


Kings and Beggars of the World

by braincloud2



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Explicit Sexual Content, M/M, Mild Language, Multi, Time Travel
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2012-12-12
Updated: 2013-06-21
Packaged: 2017-11-20 23:00:57
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 13
Words: 63,536
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/590614
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/braincloud2/pseuds/braincloud2
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Harry’s on tour and he feels on top of the world—until he wakes up one morning to find himself at the first day of the X Factor boot-camp, just sixteen years old again, and absolutely terrified that he’s just lost the last two years of his life.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hello! Currently adding this fic to ao3, it's a long one but still a wip. I starting writing it before Zerrie so they aren't mentioned, sorry. I hope you guys like it~ and all the love to you :)

 

 

‘Woo-hoo!’

‘Oh my god!’ Harry yelled as crashed through the doors to backstage after their performance.

‘Killed it!’ Louis smashed into his back and grabbed Harry’s curls. ‘We killed it out there!’

Niall and Zayn, with their arms clasping each others shoulders, howled as they lurched together along the corridor, and Liam jumped on their backs, grinning like a loon.

Louis asked, ‘Did we do good, boys, or did we do _good_?’

The others all threw back their heads cheered. The crew backstage looked on in amusement as the boys barrelled along the corridor together, jumping and dancing and yelling as they recounted the performance and how amazing the crowds had been. It had to be one their greatest performances on tour yet, and their five matching grins showed it.

**1D**

Hours later, tucked away on the top floor of their hotel for the few days they were in the State, Harry had just turned off the lamp and settled down beneath the covers of his bed, when the door slid open, rasping over the thick carpet. He opened his eyes a slither and watched a familiar figure slink into the room and come closer to the bed.

‘Harry? You still awake, mate?’ Louis whispered, and the mattress sunk as the older boy pressed his weight down onto the bed.

‘Hmm?’ Harry closed his eyes again. ‘What, Lou?’

Louis was quiet a moment, before shifting up onto the bed properly and clambering over Harry to the other side of the King-sized bed, flopping down with a sigh. ‘I just…’   

Harry opened his eyes again and rolled over. His eyes adjusted enough in the dark now to see the outline of Louis face, but not his expression. ‘You okay?’ He asked, reaching over and touching his fingers to Louis shirt.

‘Yeah, I’m great. Like, really. I can’t even express how happy am I right now, it’s ridiculous.’ Louis laughed softly, and his hand encased Harry’s pressing it tighter to his chest. ‘It’s just that I can’t help think… how does it get better than this, you know? So, what if doesn’t? What if the only place we can go now is down?’

Harry blinked in the dark, not sure what had brought this mood on in his friend.

Louis sighed again and slid down the pillows till their foreheads were almost touching. ‘I just sometimes wish… that this could go on forever, or if we could turn back time and just repeat the last two years over and over and things would be—’

Harry reached up, stopping Louis’ flow of words with the knuckles of their joined hands, and speaking slowly. ‘Stop worrying about things you can’t know. We’re right here at the moment, and that’s all that matters.’

Louis’ lips were soft against Harry’s hand before they moved. ‘Okay. Goodnight Curly.’

‘Night.’

Neither of them tried to pull their hands back, and they fell asleep side by side.

**1D**

People were talking all around him, and nearby people were singing loud enough to rouse Harry from his sleep. He was sitting slumped in an uncomfortable chair, head lolling to the side before his eyes slipped open. His foggy mind registered the people, first focusing on the shoes moving back and forth and the volume of voices around him, and still for a moment he didn’t react, not computing anything.

Then, in half an instant, he remembered where he’d fallen asleep the night before; a comfortable hotel bed with Louis by his side—and his brain short-circuited.

He stared wildly at the people around him, but no one was taking any notice of him as he seized up in his chair, trying very hard not to completely freak the fuck out. Looking down, he realised he was wearing a black shirt he hadn’t worn for nearly a year, with yellow shorts, and a cheap hat—only, last night he had gone to sleep nude like he always did. Someone had dressed him, and moved him from his hotel without waking him up or alerting his security team. Had he been drugged? Oh shit, someone had _kidnapped_ him.

Harry was on the verge of hyperventilating. He needed to get out of here. He needed to call someone. His phone!

Harry’s hand dived into his pocket, even as he thought, why would the kidnappers dress him and give him his phone? But, miracle of miracles, his fingers clamped around his phone and relief washed through him at his kidnappers’ stupidity—until he pulled the phone out.

It wasn’t his phone. Well, it was, but this was his old one, the phone he hadn’t used since X Factor…

Harry slowly raised his head and looked around again, at all the people singing and chatting in the huge waiting area, realising he recognised some of the faces. Suddenly it was clear where he was; Wemberly Area in London, where they had gone for the X Factor bootcamp. In fact, this was exactly as he remembered it the first day, waiting until ten o’clock for everyone to arrive. He remembered not knowing anyone, and so he had started talking to some of the fit looking girls, the same girls that he could see now introducing themselves and making friends with one another.

What the hell? X Factor of 2012 had just finished, but these were the people from X Factor 2010. What the bloody hell was going on?

**1D**

At quarter to ten the X Factor crew called the contestants to come up and gather on the stage. Harry shuffled along with everyone else. He felt as if he had just been side-swiped by a two-ton bus before standing up again without one physical scratch. This was insane. This couldn’t be happening; it was impossible. He saw Mary, and spotted Cher, and at one point he was pushed next to Matt, and he couldn’t say anything—they looked exactly as they had two years ago.

Stumbling out on stage and blinking in the sudden light, he looked out on the familiar rise of empty chairs. The judges weren’t here yet, but they would be arriving soon, and the other contestants were practically vibrating with nerves and excitement. Harry remembered feeling the same way back then, but right now he felt almost numb with shock. He was so freaking confused, and he kept feeling like this was a dream he would wake up from any second. But the people nudging him, the stage beneath his shoes, and the light weight of the hat on his head all felt very real.

Harry twisted around trying to pick out faces he knew, when his gaze fell on Liam.

Liam looked so young. His friend’s fringe was long and straightened, almost covering one of his eyes. He was pale, and his eyes were huge; he looked like a scared puppy in the crowd of people. The world was starting to swirl around Harry with how fast his mind was working to try and make sense of all of this.

Liam turned his head and met Harry’s gaze dead on, and Harry’s heart nearly lurched out his chest. Liam’s eyes widened further, but beyond that his face could’ve been made of stone. Harry turned away, unable to take looking at someone he thought of as a brother, and having them look back at you like you were a stranger. He was going to throw up or faint, or something. This couldn’t be real.

The crowd broke into cheers, startling Harry, and he looked up to see the doors at the top of the auditorium had opened and Simon Cowell and Louis Walsh had entered the room, in exactly the same way as they had nearly three years ago.

Simon grabbed a microphone and began addressing the contestants, the words familiar to Harry like the strangest case of déjà vu ever. Liam’s young face played in his mind and the need to see the other’s faces began burning through his stomach. He couldn’t concentrate on anything else, and Simon’s words were becoming a blur of sound. Harry looked down the line of faces, gaze skipping from person to person, until he saw Niall at the end of the row.

Niall looked so baby-faced that Harry nearly hadn’t recognised him. The other boy was shifting on the spot, as if he was unable to stay still, and from here it looked like the guy was having trouble breathing, but then Niall shifted enough that Harry got a good look at his face. He looked terrified, like he was in the midst of a claustrophobic panic attack. 

The clawing need to go over to him was almost overpowering, but Harry remained glued to his spot, instead just staring down the line of people. Niall, like Liam, somehow sensed someone looking at him, and he turned to meet Harry’s eyes. Instantly Niall face changed, relief washing over his features to the point where tears actually sprung up in his eyes. The Irish lad had always been open with his emotions, and Harry had never been more thankful for that than this moment right now. That was _his_ Niall; his reaction was way too emotional for just a stranger. God, Harry could have kissed him.

The crowd burst into cheers again over something Simon had said, but Harry was no longer paying any attention. He kept his green eyes fixed on Niall’s blue, trying to keep that string of connection, but then people began turning and moving offstage, and suddenly Harry wasn’t glued to the one spot anymore. He pushed forward, making directly for where Niall had been. He had to duck around several people, and a few made noises of surprise at his sudden movement past them, before Niall stood before him, his whole body shaking.

‘Tell me you kno’ who I am, Harry, or I t’ink I’ll just explode into a million pieces.’

Harry lunged forward and caught Niall in a strong hug, wrapping both arms around him. ‘ _Niall_.’

Niall gasped in air, and returned the hug just as strong. ‘Oh, t’ank fuck. I thought I was the only one.’

Harry pulled back. ‘The others might—Liam—’ he spun around, frantically looking around the stage for the other boys.

People were crowded near the stairs, making their way down to backstage, and he just saw the back of Liam’s head before the taller boy disappeared backstage.

‘Come on.’ Harry pulled Niall forward by his shoulder, until they were forced to let go of each other because of the crowd. Backstage the crew were calling for everyone to separate into their categories, and for all the boys to gather near their singing instructor off to the right of the area backstage. Hanging onto his hat to stop it flying off, Harry ran towards the group with Niall hot on his heels.

‘Boys, no running please.’ A lady with a microphone scowled at them, and Harry reluctantly slowed to a walk. The group of boys under twenty-five were milling aimlessly around the guy calling for them, waiting to be led off to a different room where they could learn the song as a big group. Liam was lagging at the back of the group, his chequered shirt standing out like a sore thumb amongst the mostly black and white shirts and jackets, and Harry made straight for him. He slapped his hand down on Liam’s shoulder and felt the other boy nearly jump out of his skin. Liam turned, and his face paled further on seeing Harry, before his gaze flicked to Niall and his face changed again.

‘Hey,’ Harry said, determinedly looking right into Liam’s eyes. What would he do if Liam didn’t know him? What if he just thought all this was normal?

‘Uh, hi…’ Liam just kept looking back and forth between the two of them, his expression unreadable.

Niall, unable to take the tension, pushed forward and knocked into Harry. ‘Liam, mate, ‘tis you, right?’

Liam’s mouth opened. He folded in half, his hands clasping his head tight so that hair stuck up in every direction through his fingers. ‘Oh my God. I think I just had a heart attack.’

‘Liam!’ Harry and Niall both leant forward and hugged him fiercely.

‘What on earth is going on?’ Liam sounded half-strangled. ‘Look at you two, you look so _young_.’

‘Speak for yourself, mate,’ Harry said, feeling himself tearing up. He let go and pressed his fingers into his eyes, trying to force the tears away. In all the noise and confusion of the hall, hopefully no one would notice him crying like a little girl.

‘Where’re Louis and Zayn?’ He heard Niall ask Liam.

‘I think Zayn is somewhere near the front. Are those guys the same too?’

‘No idea,’ Harry said, blinking fiercely. ‘We need to find them, and we need to figure out what the fuck is going on.’

‘Agreed.’ Niall nodded fervently.

Liam said, ‘Definitely.’

The instructor was calling for them all to move off through the double doors, into a wide corridor and down the hall to a white room with good acoustics. Harry wrapped an arm around Liam and Niall each and refused to budge as they walked at the back of the crowd—not that the other boys wanted to let go either. Harry could still feel Niall trembling, and Liam muscles were so tense he felt like rock under his clothes.

Harry’s heart was beating like a rabbit’s in his chest as he clutched his friends to him, and he was trying to not think too hard about anything but finding the others. He wasn’t sure what all this meant, but he had a bad feeling the he wouldn’t like the answers when they came.

The instructor and the assistants began handing out the lyrics to ‘Man in the Mirror’ as the camera crew began to set up their equipment to film everyone singing. Harry let go of the others boys once they reached the room, barely breathing as he pushed forward to look for Zayn and Louis. His hair whipped about his eyes as he twisted back and forth, searching the faces of the boys, and he angrily shoved the curls away from his forehead. One of the assistants waved a piece of paper in his eyes and he grabbed it to get it out of the way; the paper crumpled a little in his grip, and unlike the other under twenty-fives Harry didn’t give the lyrics a second look. He wanted to just yell out to Zayn and Louis and find out right now if they knew him, it was killing him to be so close and not know for sure.

The instructor was calling for them to go into rows and people were moving about trying to decide where to stand. There was this thrill of electricity in the room which Harry could remember being a part of years ago when everyone was so excited and nervous. Right now he wanted to just shove everyone out of the way. People were starting to organise themselves, some of them already beginning to sing the lyrics when Harry caught sight of a short-haired Zayn, looking lost near the back of the room.

Barely restraining from breaking into a run, Harry hurried forward, making directly for him. With Niall and Liam behind him, he felt more confident that Zayn would know him.

‘ _Zayn,_ ’ Harry demanded the Bradford boy’s attention, and when Zayn looked up at him, his eyes went huge.

‘Harry?’

Harry slammed into the other boy, and Zayn’s tanned arms came up and squeezed back, trapping him tight. Niall and Liam pushed in close behind Harry, until they were all huddling around Zayn.

‘What’s going on, Harry? I was just about losing my mind,’ Zayn said, pulling back from the others. His gaze couldn’t seem to settle on any one of them.

‘I have no clue.’ Harry’s thoughts were all over the place. ‘Uh, you all remember going to sleep in the hotel, right?’

He received nods all around.

‘But I was leaning agains’ a wall with me eyes closed when I came to this morning,’ Niall said. ‘I don’t know about you lads, but I’ve nev’r slept standing before, and I’ve nev’r woken up someplace I didn’t go t’ sleep.’

‘Wait a minute,’ Zayn cut in. ‘What happened to Louis?’

They fell silent, each looking around the room for the Doncaster boy. Everyone else in the room by now was going over the lyrics from the paper, and no one was paying attention to the boys at the back.

‘I don’t see him, do you?’ Liam asked in a low tone.

‘No. He’s not here.’ Harry’s throat felt too dry. ‘Has anyone else seen him this morning?’

The others shook their heads, tension clear in each of their faces—but an assistant at the front was calling for attention and everybody else in the room was going quiet, eager to get started.

It was absolute torture to stand quiet at the back and pretend to go along with whatever the instructor was saying at the front, having to go through silly voice warm-ups to loosen everyone up, when Harry was just about bursting out of his skin to go and find Louis. Even with the others by his side, this whole thing still felt impossibly surreal. They were standing in rows singing lyrics like some all boy choir, pretending like they hadn’t somehow _gone back in time_.

The camera crew came around to them at one point, zooming in on Liam’s face and then on Harry’s own as they sang. Harry’s hands shook by his sides, and he had to clench them into fists and close his eyes to stop himself from doing something stupid like screaming or bursting into tears again.

The camera eventually moved on, and fingers touched his wrist. Harry opened his eyes to meet Zayn’s serious gaze as they continued to sing ‘Man in the Mirror’. Harry unclenched his hands and turned his palm over, catching Zayn’s fingers and squeezing. They would be okay. Whatever was going on, he had to believe that they’d be okay.

They finally got a break at twelve for lunch and the four boys were some of the first people out of the room, despite being at the back. Harry rushed by the various crew members and other contestants starting to mill about, with the other three close on his tail.

‘Upstairs,’ Liam said. ‘Maybe he’s still in the waiting area.’

Harry bit his lip, his eyebrows pulling down, but it was as good as place to try as any. They rushed up the stairway; their footsteps echoing from the acoustics, and banged the door open at the top into the large waiting area.

‘Should we split up?’ Zayn asked hesitantly.

Harry tried to catch his breath. He didn’t want to, but he also knew how far reaching the complex went. An idea struck him.

‘Give me your phone numbers, and we’ll meet back here in half an hour if we can’t—’ the words stuck in his throat.

The others understood anyway, pulling out their phones and swapping numbers quickly. With one last look at everyone, Harry nodded, and turned down the corridor to his right.

He wandered down the hallway after hallway around the complex, only occasionally running into another contestant or crew member, and the further he went the more he began to doubt Louis was still in the arena. He checked his phone constantly, hoping for a call from one of the others, but the screen remained blank.

Just when he was thinking about turning around and heading back, Harry turned another corner, now looking down a long corridor next to a wall of glass to an outside courtyard— and his gaze fell on the hunched over shape sitting on the wall, and all the air whooshed out of him on a name.

‘ _Louis_.’ Harry broke into a run, battering through small door to the courtyard, causing Louis to startle and half-turn his body, before Harry flung himself on him. ‘Louis!’

He made a pained noise as Harry smashed into him, nearly knocking him from the railing, and then Louis’ arms came up and around him clutching at his clothes and hair.

‘Harry? Oh my God, Harry! _Harry_.’ Louis’ voice sounded wrecked, and his eyes were red like he’d been crying. His hands kept moving from Harry’s face, to his curls to his back.

All Harry could do was stand there and let him, relief almost palatable as it washed through him.

‘Shit, Haz, what the fuck is going on? I don’t understand anything—I just—’

Harry hugged him tighter, placing his chin on Louis’ shoulder and pressing his forehead into Louis’ bowl-cut hairstyle that he hadn’t seen in more than a year. ‘We’re going to be okay, Lou. All of us.’

‘All? You mean, the others?’

‘They’re looking for you, you idiot. Why didn’t you go into the room with everyone else? You had us all freaking out because you weren’t there.’

Louis pulled back from Harry and wiped his hand over his red eyes. ‘I just… I couldn’t go on that stage pretending like I wasn’t having a bloody meltdown. I thought I was dreaming at first, and then I realised I was really awake and everything was all— _X Factor._ Oh God, I thought I was alone. Thought I’d lost you all—’ He sounded about two seconds away from breaking into tears again.

Harry tugged at Louis’ shoulder, his gut aching at seeing his friend so miserable. ‘Come on, let’s go meet the others. We need to figure out what to do now, and they need to know you’re okay.’

‘Right. Yeah, good plan that… Excellent.’

Harry gave him a small smile, and was relieved to see it shakily returned.

**1D**

By the time they got together with the other lads, it was almost time to head back to the small room with the other under twenty-five contestants. Louis, though, hadn’t had a chance to go over the lyrics, and if the day continued to progress like it was, soon they would have to go up and sing to stay in the competition. There was no time to freak out, and wonder what the hell was going on. As Liam said, right now all they could do was just go with it and hope things started making sense soon.

Liam pulled out the lyrics sheet that he’d folded and put into his pocket at the end of the instructing session this morning, and Louis crowded in next to him to refresh his memory of the words. After more than an hour of singing the same song, Harry knew the lyrics well, but he couldn’t calm the questions making his stomach swirl. What were the chances of them all making it again? What would they do if one person didn’t get through this time?

All too soon they were being called back into the room, and Harry realised none of them had eaten any lunch in the break like most people had. He didn’t really mind since he felt too sick to eat anyway, but he looked over at the others, wondering if they were hungry and saw tight nausea reflected in each of their faces.

He couldn’t take seeing them like this. ‘Aren’t you hungry, Nialler?’

Niall blinked at him in surprise. ‘Uh, yeah, a bit?’

‘Right, sorry. I just couldn’t tell with you looking so constipated—’ Harry ducked Niall’s slap to the head.

‘Oi! I t’ink I have good reason, you ass.’

Harry grinned back at him, and some of the others lads laughed, tension visibly releasing from their shoulders.

‘We’ll run over to Maccers first chance we get,’ Liam said. ‘But to be honest, I’m not sure I could keep anything down at this point.’

Louis curled his arm over Liam’s shoulders and pulled him in. ‘Aw, Liam don’t be nervous. It’s only our entire future careers on the line.’

‘Wow. It’s amazing how much that doesn’t make me feel better. Thanks for that.’

‘I live only to please you, Liam. And you Harry, you Curly-haired wonder. Look at his baby-faced smile, why, he looks all of four years old.’

Harry shoved Louis. ‘Like you’re any better with that hair-cut.’

Louis detached himself from Liam and flung himself on Harry. ‘Already talking and insulting folk! Kids today just grow up so quickly.’

‘Oh, shut up, Lou.’ Harry laughed, more high-pitched than normal.

There was a look in Louis’ eyes that was edging on maniacal. His stress had shifted into this infectious aura of hyper energy, the kind that usually only appeared when all the boys were really tired but were still being forced to go to interviews, fuelled with sugar and energy drinks. The others could sense it too, but the assistants were once again calling for quiet, and so the five of them huddled near the back, practically vibrating with energy. The crew assistant was introducing another instructor with a name that caught all of their attention.

‘Our vocal producer and song writer: Savan Kotecha.’

Savan, still wearing that same hat they all remembered him in, entered the room and people mostly broke into polite applause.

‘Yeah!’ Louis yelled from the back, clapping overly loud.

‘Woohoo! Savan!’ Zayn and Niall hollered almost instantly.

‘Savan Kotecha! I _love_ that guy!’

Liam’s eyebrows disappeared beneath his hair as he laughed. Louis clapped a hand down on Harry’s back, rocking his whole body forward, and Harry couldn’t help the huge grin that stole over his face as people twisted around to stare at the five of them surprise.

‘Er, thanks for that, boys,’ Savan said. He looked bemused, but then carried on with the same speech he given the whole group last time.

Despite the fact that the speech was meant to calm their nerves, Harry once again felt that anxiety starting to eat away at him. By the time it came to actually go perform, he’d worked his insides into one giant knot.

Everything was a million times worse than the last time he’d gone through this, back then he hadn’t really anything to lose and everything to gain, but now he exactly how good it could get. It could all be stolen from him right now if they didn’t all get through the first hundred person cut, and even if four of them got through, it wouldn’t be the same. Harry knew he wouldn’t have the heart to continue if one of them were missing.

People were calling to one another and all too quickly they were being separated into lines. Louis and Zayn were put into a different line, and Harry had only a moment of disappointment before he found himself directed to follow Liam and Niall’s backs onto the brightly lit stage, out in front from the judging panel where Simon lounged back in his chair, surveying the boys. Next to him, Louis was hunched forward over the desk watching them all with his pale gaze before turning and saying something to Simon, who barely acknowledged him in his very Simon-esque way.

Harry knew Simon was really a friendly guy, and the man had a sense of humour like nothing else, but this Simon didn’t know them. The man could easily decide they didn’t cut it this time, and send them home before they really got to even prove themselves as a group.

Simon leaned forward. ‘All right. Under twenty-five boys, singing ‘Man in the Mirror’ by Michael Jackson. Go down the line one by one, stepping forward and singing only the chorus. Understand? Good, you first. Go.’ Simon smiled, pointing his pen at the lucky boy down the end.

Harry shifted as one by one each boy stepped forward and did his best to sing his style of ‘Man in the Mirror’ into the silence. The line progressed swiftly, Louis and Simon exchanging meaningful looks during each one—occasionally making a small note on the papers before them, their faces mostly unreadable during each rendition—like this was a game that only they knew the rules to.

Niall nudged Harry with his elbow, and arched his eyebrow high when Harry looked over at him. A rush of affection for the Irish lad went through Harry and the knot that had formed in his stomach loosened enough for him to smirk back as he realised something else. They weren’t the same kids on this stage that they’d been last time, in fact; the three of them had way more experience with performing to huge crowds than anyone else on this stage.

Harry caught Liam’s nervous eye as the singers progressed quickly towards them, and let his smirk widen. Liam paused, and then couldn’t help smiling back. The boy before Liam was stepping back into line, and Liam was called forward.

Liam brought the microphone up and let loose as he sang. He met Simon’s gaze bravely, and his body moved with a beat that wasn’t there. The urge to sing along with Liam was almost overpowering to Harry, and only Niall shifting by his side stopped him from stepping up next to his friend. All too soon Liam finished and he stepped back, but this time his face broke out into a huge, sunshine grin as he looked over to Niall.

Niall stepped forward without being called, and Harry grabbed his arm quickly to stop him.

‘Wait,’ he whispered through his laugh.

Niall’s expression turned sheepish and stepped back, waiting until Louis had stopped talking to a carefully blank-faced Simon, and Niall was finally called. He bounded forward and launched into his song with a gusto that even surprised Harry, taking the song at a higher tenor and belting it out like it was the climax of the five minute song. Harry looked across at Liam, who puffed his cheeks out briefly in a ridiculous monkey-like face, and Harry had to bite his hand to stop himself from laughing out loud. Niall finished with a flourish and bounced backwards into Harry, grinning like a madman and pushing Harry forward like he’d forgotten, again, that they were supposed to wait until they were called.

Harry snorted at the lad’s enthusiasm, nerves fluttering through his stomach as he looked over at Simon and saw a strange look on his face; the man’s eyes flicking from Niall to Harry and then back to Liam like he couldn’t decide which one to look at. Then Louis called Harry forward, and he had no more time to think.

He stepped forward, brought the microphone up to his lips and _sang._ He put his whole body into the words, stretching out a hand to the judges and bringing it back to his chest like he was trying to physically pull them in. He could feel the other lads behind him and it made him bold enough to smirk over at Simon and rock his shoulder forward into the beat in his mind—before throwing back his head and finishing on a crescendo. He whipped the microphone away and feeling his dimples digging into his cheeks as Liam and Niall made noises of appreciation even if no one else was clapping.

‘Rocked it, buddy,’ Niall said as Harry stepped back, Liam reaching over and pushing Harry’s hat back and forth over his curls.

 Simon’s expression had changed again when Harry looked over at him. His eyes had narrowed on them, but Harry could tell his thoughts were far away, considering something, but the man was still giving away nothing of their nature. Louis called the next boy forward, and Harry settled down. They’d done all they could, now all they could do was wait for the result.

 

 

[me](http://braincloud2.tumblr.com/)


	2. 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Harry’s on tour and he feels on top of the world—until he wakes up one morning to find himself at the first day of the X Factor boot-camp, just sixteen years old again, and absolutely terrified that he’s just lost the last two years of his life.

 

 

Harry didn’t get to see Louis and Zayn do their turn, but he hugged them after when they came backstage; Zayn with his eyes still too wide like maybe he’s freaking out again, and Louis who clutched at Harry’s shoulder like he needed an anchor.

There was a whole lot of waiting around while the under twenty-five girls queued up and to have their turn in front of the judges, so the five boys went to do the only thing they could under the circumstances. They went to get some food.

‘Maybe we fell into a time-slip in the dimensional stream,’ Liam said, ten minutes later as he stared down at the burger in his hands.

‘Maybe you read too many comic books,’ Harry said.

‘Or maybe I don’t read enough, since otherwise I’d have a more coherent explanation for this whole thing, and also a solution for how to turn everything normal again.’

‘Do you think it will?’ Louis asked, popping chip after chip into his mouth. ‘Go normal, I mean. Like, will we go to sleep tonight and wake up and we’re back where we’re supposed to be?’

‘It could happen,’ Liam frowned.

‘But you don’t think it will,’ Zayn spoke up.

Liam’s brows furrowed further. He took a bite of his burger and didn’t answer.

**1D**

Waiting to know whether they had gotten through was strange. It some ways it was exactly like Harry remembered from the first time, the same people wandering about and getting upset over their performance, and the same agonising wait in that room with all the other under twenty-five boys for someone to come in and tell them whether or not they’d made it—but it was also completely different. The five of them huddled close everywhere they went, pulling their chairs in close in a circle till their knees were knocking into each other, and keeping their conversations hushed in the group, instead of acting out like they had they first time.

Harry felt on edge, half expecting for people to crowd in on them like they were all so used to, with the girls screaming and trying to touch them and everyone taking photos—but now no one was taking much notice of them. It was all very strange, the sudden lack of attention. Harry hadn’t even realised until now how much he’d grown used to the lime-light every time they were in a public place, however nobody knew _One Direction_ here. The idea that their band didn’t exist yet was starting to sink in, numbing his whole body.

‘You all right, Hazza?’ Louis curled an arm around Harry.

He slouched into the embrace, grateful. ‘Yeah. Basically sorting stuff out in my head.’

Louis opened his mouth, probably to give some kind of clever remark, but then he changed his mind and just nodded instead, features going serious. They sat in silence, waiting for their fate to be announced.

**1D**

‘Harry Styles.’

Half an hour later, Harry’s name was called by the crew assistant member reading names off a piece of paper. Louis’ hand tightened once on Harry’s shoulder, before pushing him forward, causing him to stumble towards the door.

He joined Liam and Niall on the stairs outside the room, both of them welcoming him eagerly, before turning back to watch the door. They were hanging back from descending the stairs, letting everyone else pass them to go down to the backstage entrance. Harry recognised Aiden and a few other boys passing them, and he knew their group was the one going through, that everyone left to go in the other half would be the ones told they were going home. They waited, and waited.

Then finally Zayn came out the door—blinking like he’d been in a dark room and was stepping out into the light. Harry pulled him into a strong one armed hug, before stepping back and willing Louis to be the next one to step through the door.

Person after person continued to exit, each giving the four of them a weird look because they were still hovering at the top of the stairs, instead of descending. Harry’s heart was starting to creep up into his throat as Louis still didn’t show. He hadn’t even been counting how many people had come through the door, but he knew only twenty-five boys were going through and they had to be getting close to the end now.

‘Where’s he?’ Niall muttered. He turned to Zayn, beginning to look pissed off. ‘He did alright in his solo, didn’t he?’

‘Yeah.’ Zayn nodded straight away. ‘I mean, I thought it was one of the best he’d ever done. I don’t know why…’

The door opened another unfamiliar boy came out, letting it shut behind him. The door stayed closed with a sort of finality.

‘No.’ Harry stared. ‘It can’t—’

That was it, then. He couldn’t do this without Louis. Did that mean he’d have to go home? That there would be no band, no fame, no touring, that everything they’d done over the last few years was gone? It couldn’t be possible. Reality couldn’t screw them over like that—it wasn’t fair. How the hell could this happen?

The silver door clicked open.

‘Looks like we’re still in this together, lads,’ Louis said, smiling.

Harry released a wordless sound, and rushed forward with the others. They swamped Louis, cheering as they patted him on the head, chest and back. Anyone watching them would think they had just been told they were going through to the finals.

‘Can’t get rid of me that easy,’ Louis said, as they made their way down the stairs. ‘Though, why they felt the need to leave me till last is beyond me.’

Harry could only try and breathe in response.

**1D**

Late that night, the boys snuck out from their boot-camp rooms at the hotel to the one Liam and Niall were sharing. Niall let them in without a word, and they all crowded into the small rooms, finding a place on one of the twin beds or on the floor between them.

‘Maybe it was a fan,’ Zayn was saying. ‘Like, maybe they cursed us into coming back here because they want us to win X Factor.’

‘Or maybe it wasn’t a fan, but someone who wants us to fail and never make it in the industry,’ Liam countered.

‘Oh my God!’ Louis suddenly said, eyes going wide. ‘It’s all my fault. Remember Harry, I made that stupid wish about wanting to go back and do X factor again? Oh, Christ.’

‘Don’t be stupid,’ Harry said. ‘How could this be your fault?’

‘I don’t know, a Genie or something must have heard my wish, and now we’re all stuck back here ‘cause of me.’

Niall said flatly, ‘Louis, I dunno how to break t’is to you, but Genies don’t exist.’

‘Yeah, well neither does time-travel!’

None of them really knew what to say that, and the magnitude of everything filled the room.

Harry looked from face to face in the silence and he felt his affection for all of them growing, as if a golden ball was spinning larger inside him, taking up all available space. ‘I’m glad,’ Harry said, his voice thick. ‘I’m glad it wasn’t just me that came back here. I glad to have you all with me.’

Zayn’s arm went around him from where they sat on the bed. ‘Me too. I wouldn’t have been able to deal with it, if it had just been me, and none of you knew who I was.’

The others agreed quietly, and Harry could tell by their solemn expressions that each was imagining what it might have been like by themselves. In this room, it almost felt like nothing had changed. Despite their younger appearances, they were just the same four lads Harry had spent the last few years of his life with, and that made him feel slightly calmer about the whole thing—like no matter what happened to the world he thought he knew, as long as they were all together, they could be okay. 

‘Can we just stay here tonight?’ Harry asked eventually. ‘I don’t really want to go back to separate rooms right now.’

‘Seconded.’ Louis raised his hand, looking like a school kid from where he sat cross-legged on the floor.

Liam frowned though. ‘I don’t know. We may have to go through boot-camp all over again. I don’t want to risk our chances just because we’re feeling off from a bad night’s sleep…’

Zayn rubbed his eyes. ‘If I go back to my room alone tonight, I’m not sure I’ll sleep anyway. At least in here, I’ll know—’

‘That we’re still one happy, bromantic family,’ Louis said. He leapt up from the floor and tackling a squawking Zayn backwards onto the bed.

‘Oh, fine.’ Liam gave in easily. ‘I do kind of want you all here too.’

‘A slumber party ‘tis then,’ Niall grinned, looking relieved.

They dragged the small bedside table out of the way and pushed the two twin beds together, pulling off all the blankets and setting it up so they could all sleep longways across it, even though that meant their feet were hanging off the end. Harry curled up in the middle between Louis and Zayn, tucking his bare-feet between Zayn’s socks as Louis flung an arm over him. In a muddle of limbs and huddled heat, any thoughts they had of timelines and ‘what if’s’ disappeared as, one by one, sleep stole over them.

**1D**

The alarm went off the next morning and Harry groaned, shifting forward into the warmth of the body next to him. Another voice mumbled something unintelligible next to his ear, but it wasn’t until Harry felt a second warm body curling around him from behind him that he opened his eyes in surprise.

It wasn’t often that he had more than one person in his bed, but in an instant after seeing Louis’ young face and Zayn’s hand gripping his waist that all the strange events of the day came rushing back.

‘Shit,’ Harry breathed. The world hadn’t returned to normal.

**1D**

Louis began to treat the whole situation as some sort of awesome cosmic joke, and while Harry had a sickening gut feeling that this was way more serious than they knew, it was so much easier to deal with if he just followed Louis’ lead. It also didn’t help that the next morning was the un-judged dance portion of the boot-camp, where they were encouraged to be themselves.

‘I feel so untouched, right now! Need you so much, somehow!’  Louis shouted along with the lyrics of the song, pulling moves that was about one in five correct with the choreography. ‘I can’t forget you. Go crazy from the moment I met you!’

The five boys had bunched together near the front but off to the side, and since it was well established amongst them that none of them were naturally talented dancers, they were hardly even trying to follow the moves properly.

‘I feel so untouched, and I! Want you so much that I! Just can’t resist you!’ Zayn and Liam had joined in with Louis, all more shouting the words than singing and dancing so spectacularly bad, as they wiggled to the beat and pulled exaggerated poses that vaguely resembled the choreography.

An arm wrapped around Harry’s neck and Niall wrenched him forward suddenly, laughing as Harry nearly fell over as he pulled him up to the other three. 

‘Show us your sexy moves, Styles,’ Louis said when Harry found himself at the front next to him.

Harry grinned back at him, the reckless mood infecting him too. Today he’d foregone his beanie, deciding to let his hair be a wild as it wanted to be, something he was thankful for right now.

The beat kicked up again, and Harry threw himself into it, head-banging hard enough to make his hair bounce in every direction, and punching the air in front of him as his shoes slid along the stage in a flailing parody of the running man. The lads cackled gleefully behind him and all of them started dancing in their own special way, and Harry didn’t even care if they were making complete arses of themselves—like anything like that made sense anymore. The chorus started again and all five of them couldn’t help but belt out the lyrics together.

‘ _I feel so untouched, and I! Want you so much that I! Just can’t resist you! It’s not enough to say that I miss you!’_

They had caught Brian Friedman’s attention by now, and the man stood near the edge of the stage in that freaking leprechaun suit with his arms crossed, just watching them.

‘And one!’ Louis shouted, moving to the first choreographed pose.

Harry and the other boys copied him easily, and when Louis called the next movement, they all moved in sync—all still dancing stupidly but at least their ridiculousness was in tune with each other.

‘And freestyle!’ Louis hollered, almost instantly switching to his famous ‘pat the dog, screw the light-bulb’ move. Harry laughed, not able to do anything but try to stay upright, until the song wound itself up.

‘You boys have great group stage presence, but at least try to get some of the moves right, okay?’ Brian Friedman said, suddenly standing right in front of them.

The five of them looked at each other, and Harry had to choke back on his laughter.

‘Uh, we’re not actually a group Mr Friedman,’ Liam said, but his eyes were sparkling with a mischief that rivalled Louis.

Niall coughed ‘Not yet anyway,’ he said under his breath.

Brian actually looked confused. ‘You’re not?’

‘Nope, flying solo the lot of us,’ Louis said, almost catching Liam in a headlock, but the boy ducked out of it quickly, not wanting a noogie on stage.

‘Oh. Huh.’ Brian kept looking at them for a few seconds, like he was wondering if they were having him on, but then he turned away, moving down the line.

Several times after that Harry caught Brian looking over at them as the five of them messed about with the choreography, changing it up every time a new song came on. When Brian moved back down to the judges’ panel to speak to Simon and Louis, Harry saw him pointing at their group and Simon looking over with interest.

**1D**

‘Now Zayn, no disappearing out the back this time,’ Louis said as everyone cleared the centre of the stage. ‘Just because you can’t dance for shit and everyone’s gonna laugh at you, doesn’t mean you should feel embarrassed.’ Louis smiled and slid a hand down Zayn’s face.

‘I’m going to get you when you least expect it, Tomlinson,’ Zayn said lowly.

‘Okay, and now the other half of the boys please. Remember, give each other plenty of room,’ Brian called out.

The first half of the twenty-five boys, with both Liam and Niall dancing had already preformed, and now it was Zayn, Louis and Harry’s turn to take the floor with ten other boys. Last time Harry had kept himself near the back, not wanting to embarrass himself with his lame dancing—but this time he knew not to take it that seriously. It was more about stage presence and looking confident than actual skill in dancing. 

Harry placed himself between Louis and Zayn in front of him as the music started up. The lights were bright on their heads with everyone watching around them, but that was certainly nothing new to them, and all three of them kept their heads up as they tried their best to actually follow the choreography this time. Harry still felt silly trying to do the moves, but this time he didn’t care about making it look cool, and just smiled like a dork throughout the whole thing.

Brian called from the audience, ‘Freestyle.’

‘Inbetweeners Dance, go!’ Louis yelled almost instantly.

Despite not expecting it, Harry didn’t miss a beat, stepping to the side and raising his elbow in tandem with Zayn and Louis. He heard Liam and Niall start laughing from the sidelines as the three of them shuffled back and forth on stage. Everyone else started smiling too, looking at the judges to see their reaction and back to the boys. Simon’s eyebrows had raised but he was actually smiling too and Harry’s heart leapt—finally seeing the Simon he had come to know.

‘Hip thrust!’ Louis shouted.

Harry struggled to keep a straight face as they obediently did their trade-mark slow thrusts to both side, still in sync, and the contestant girls on the sidelines began to cheering and hooting with laughter.

‘All right, thanks boys,’ Simon said, lifting his hand to make the music stop. ‘Glad to see you’re not taking this as seriously as everyone else. Take a seat.’

That wiped the smile off Harry’s face pretty quick. Even when Louis and Zayn turned around to jump on him and push him back to the sidelines, he couldn’t bring himself to smile again.

He kept forgetting that this Simon didn’t know them, didn’t know how hard working they were. What if he thought they were just a bunch of schoolboys having a lark and not ready for the big stage yet? Just when Harry thought he could handle this—that he was doing okay because he’d already experienced X Factor and knew what was going on—this happens to kick up that storm of ‘what if’ questions up again.

He wasn’t sure how much more of this he could take.

**1D**

Once again that night they found themselves in piled in to Liam and Niall’s room, this time with take-away McDonalds bags and wrappers strewn everywhere. Harry finished off the last of his drink as he looked over the list of forty songs they were each supposed to choose one from.

Zayn sighed, and threw away his list. ‘I don’t want to do this.’

Harry looked over at him. ‘What do you mean?’

‘I mean, this is stupid. It’s a giant risk, going up there and performing solo again,’ Zayn said.

‘Why?’ Louis asked, genuinely confused. ‘We already know how it’s going to go. We sing, they tell us no, and then we’re put into a group, perform on the show… and check my flow which rhymes also!’

‘You’re a poet and you didn’t know it,’ Liam said.

‘No, I’m a singer Liam, get it right for once.’

‘You guys, I’m serious.’ Zayn scowled. ‘I’m not worried about getting sent home, I’m worried that some of us might get through now. As solo artists?’ he added when everyone looked at him blankly.

‘Oh,’ Harry said. ‘I hadn’t thought of that.’

‘That is actually a fair point. We’re not t’e same we used to be, you know?’ Niall said. ‘What if you get through Harry, and t’e rest of us get put in group?’

Harry stared at him, unable to think of anything much worse.

‘Stop it, Niall, you’re scaring the poor boy.’ Louis grabbed Harry and pulled him in for a hug. ‘Look, it’s a situation that can be easy fixed.’

‘How so?’ Liam frowned.

Louis leaned forward, his eyes glinting as he whispered, ‘Because I have a plan. We’re going to—’

A catchy ring-tone cut him off.

After a moment of surprise, Louis dug through his pocket to find his phone. He pulled it out, took one look at it, and his face swiftly drained of colour.

‘Louis?’ Harry asked, alarmed. ‘What’s wrong?’

Louis didn’t answer. He turned his phone around so everyone else could see the caller I.D, his eyes gone despondent.

Harry breathed in sharply. ‘Oh.’

_Hannah Walker_ blinked a few more times as the ring-tone played out, all of the boys staring at the phone until it went silent once more.

‘That’s fucked up.’

‘Niall, don’t.’ Liam shushed him. ‘Louis? Are you okay?’

‘I… honestly don’t know. What should I do?’ Louis asked quietly, looking up at the others, and once again Harry was struck by how bloody young Louis looked.

‘Are you going to call her back?’ Zayn asked.

‘I don’t know. I haven’t talked to her properly for ages.’

‘She’ll probably call again in a few minutes if you don’t,’ Zayn pointed out.

Louis just looked more upset. ‘But, what about El? Does she—I mean, is all that gone now? Erased, just like _that?_ ’ his voice cracked.

Harry pushed himself forward at the same time as everyone else, all of them trying to wrap Louis up within their huddle. Harry ended up half sprawled over Louis’ lap, his head tucked in under the older boy’s chin.

‘You’re not alone,’ Liam mumbled into Louis’ hair. ‘I’ve been trying to think about Danielle, but it’s hard. What if this doesn’t switch back and everything we’ve been through is gone? I love her so much. She’s such a huge part of me, and right now she doesn’t know I exist.’

‘Liam, mate. Why didn’t you say something?’ Zayn looked torn, and he grabbed Liam’s head without letting go of Louis.

‘Thought we all had enough problems, so I kept it to myself,’ Liam said.

‘Well, don’t next time,’ Niall said, gripping Liam’s shoulder. ‘No matter what, we’re your mates, and we’re gonna stick through t’is together.’

‘Literally,’ Harry added, squeezing tighter.

‘Look at us. We’ve turned into a bunch of sops.’ Louis smiled down at Harry, his eyes only a little wet as he tugged at Harry’s curls.

‘Don’t lie. You’ve always been soppy, Louis,’ Harry replied, but none of them moved for a while anyway.     

**1D**

‘This isn’t going to work,’ Zayn said.

‘It _will_.’

‘Louis, what if we’re ruining our chances though?’ Harry asked.

‘Bit late for second thoughts now,’ Liam said.

‘Well, I t’ink it’s a great idea.’

‘Thank you, Niall.’ Louis smiled.

‘Though, t’e lads are right. If it goes wrong, we’re gonna look like bloody idiots.’

Louis’ smile fell. ‘And I thought you were my friend.’

The judges had begun calling the boys one by one onto the stage to sing their choice of song, while everyone else sat in the audience and watched. Backstage, the five of them waited in line with all the other anxious boys. The atmosphere was incredibly tense and barely anyone else was talking, all preferring to stay in their own heads going over their chosen song. The crew members were rushing back and forth, and the assistant at the front of the line had he hand glued to his ear piece. Then finally, he turned and called one of the five of them.

‘Harry Styles, you’re next. Harry Styles.’

Harry took a deep breath, exchanged a look with others, and stepped forward.

The assistant wasn’t paying much attention to Harry, instead looking at the floor and listening carefully to someone speaking through his ear piece. But then he turned to beckon Harry towards the stage—before stopping short.

‘Yes?’ the assistant frowned down at Harry and the four boys at his back.

‘We’d like to go on together, please,’ Harry said.

The assistant’s frown deepened. ‘What? This is the solo performance. Groups aren’t till later. Please boys, I don’t have time for this. I need Harry Styles to come forward,’ he called back down the line of boys.

Harry smiled a little. ‘I’m Harry, and we’re all solo artists, but we want to go up there together.’

Now the man just looked confused. The other under twenty-five boys were starting to look over at the five of them curiously.

The man touched his ear piece again, listening and frowning. ‘Look, you have to go up there; they’re waiting for you now. It’s supposed to be one at a time.’

‘It’s alright, buddy, we know what we’re doing,’ Louis said, patting the man solidly on the arm before moving up the stairs.

Harry and the others quickly followed him before the assistant could stop them, and then they were all out on the stage. A hush fell over the audience as the five of them walked towards the front of the stage. Simon’s brows furrowed from where he was lounging in his judges chair, and next to him, Nicole whispered a question to Louis Walsh, who just looked perplexed.

‘Hello boys,’ Simon’s expression was still wary. ‘What’s the problem?’

‘Erm,’ Harry looked at the others. They hadn’t actually prepared a speech for Simon, and Harry felt a smile creeping up over his face at the fact that they hadn’t put any thought into what they’d actually say. ‘Basically, we know we entered as solo artists, but the five of us have talked it over, and we’ve decided we want to form a group?’

Simon’s eyebrow arched high, and the audience murmured around him. ‘A group,’ Simon repeated.

‘Yeah.’ Liam said, and Harry pushed the microphone close to the other boy. ‘This isn’t just something that we’ve decided rashly, we know how important these decisions are.’

‘But we really do think we’d do better as a band, than as solo performers,’ Louis finished off.

Harry nodded when Louis looked down at him, and he turned back to face Simon, smiling. ‘So basically, we just wanted to know if it was possible to continue as a group from now on.’

Simon didn’t look convinced. ‘Did you boys know each other before coming here?’

‘Er,’ Harry looked at the others.

Niall leaned forward to the mic. ‘We all met ‘ere at boot-camp, but we’ve all become really great friends in t’e time since we’ve known each ot’er. We’re all fun, but hard-working lads, and I t’ink we’ll go farther toget’er.’

‘So, you’ve known each other for two days, and you think you can make a band,’ Simon said bluntly, and the audience laughed a bit behind him.

Nerves fluttered in Harry’s stomach, he could feel they were losing the audience. Louis’ hand clenched tight on his back.

‘Regardless,’ Zayn said now, ‘we want to continue on as a group, and we’re just asking for a chance to prove ourselves.’

Simon pulled in a huge breath, and let it whoosh out. He waved his hand in surrender. ‘Have you got a name then?’

They answered together, without pausing. ‘ _One Direction.’_

**1D**

Harry looked across at the other boys as the first beats of Coldplay began to play through the speakers. Louis caught his eye and smiled at him, and with the lights on them and the audience before them, Harry finally felt at home.

‘I used to rule… the world,’ Liam sang from his heart, staring out into the audience. ‘Seas would rise when I gave the word. Now in the morning I sleep… alone. Sweep the streets I used to own.’

The beat kicked in and together they all walked forward to the front of the stage as Zayn took over, his voice rising above their background harmony. Niall jumped in easy at his turn, his eyes as clear and vibrant as his voice. Harry moved with the beat, the song taking over his body as it geared up to the chorus, and he caught Louis’ eye again just before the drums kicked in.

They all moved forward at the same time, punching towards the audience all in sync through the sheer amount of time they’d spent on stage together, and launched into the chorus.

They had changed it up with Zayn and Liam singing the higher harmonies through the chorus, while Harry, Louis and Niall sang the words—

‘I hear, Jerusalem bells are ringing! Roman Cavalry choirs, are singing. Be my mirror, my sword and shield! My missionaries in a foreign field. For some reason, I can’t explain! Once you go there was never, never an honest… word. That was when I ruled the world.’

He saw Simon’s surprised face at one point. He saw the man exchange an incredulous look with Nicole next to him, and they both laughed as if someone had just handed them a basket of golden eggs.

The boys broke into the bridge of ‘Oohs’ and Harry threw back his head, giving it his all. The others spread out across the stage, stretching their hands out to the captive audience as their combined voices washed through the auditorium. Harry felt alive on the music, like the lyrics were reverberating through his soul.

‘For some reason, I can’t explain! I know Saint Peter will call my name.’

They all came back together for the final lines, Louis’ hand instantly finding a place on Harry’s back as Liam turned the last words into honey.

‘ _Never an honest word… but that was when I ruled the world_.’

 

[me](http://braincloud2.tumblr.com/)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you! More soon, but the power keeps cutting out from the storm D:


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Harry’s on tour and he feels on top of the world—until he wakes up one morning to find himself at the first day of the X Factor boot-camp, just sixteen years old again, and absolutely terrified that he’s just lost the last two years of his life.

 

‘Boys! Boys, we want to ask you some questions over here.’ One of the X Factor camera crews ambushed them as soon as they came down backstage.

‘They want to ask us questions, Zayn!’ Louis grabbed Zayn and pulled him in. ‘It’s like we’re famous!’

‘Whoo!’ Zayn raised both arms into the air.

‘Of course you can.’ Liam beamed at the camera man.

‘How could we ever refuse you?’ Harry added, feeling high on the performance.

The crew set up their camera and microphone swiftly, eager to start filming. ‘Okay, boys, first of all can everyone introduce themselves please, and then we’ll get to the questions,’ the camera man said.

They slung their arms around each other’s shoulders and waists easily; Harry in the centre with Liam and Louis either side.

‘Well, I’m Liam,’

‘I’m Zayn,’

‘I’m Niall,’

‘I’m Louis!’

‘I’m Harry, and we’re _One Direction_.’

‘Yay,’ Louis hollered, yanking back on Harry and Zayn, nearly causing the whole line of them to fall over as all them cheered along with him.

The camera man looked taken aback. ‘Uh, that was great. So… what made you boys decide to change from being solo contestants to a group? Remember to repeat the question, please, so we can edit this out later.’

Harry looked at the others. ‘Erm. Well, while being a solo singer is amazing and all, we decided to become a group because we thought we’d have a better chance at being successful together than by ourselves.’

The camera man’s brows furrowed. ‘But you, Liam, you’ve gotten pretty far before as a solo contestant. Aren’t you nervous to be making such a huge change in your career?’

‘I have entered this show before and got to the judges houses, but I don’t think I was quite ready for it back then,’ Liam said. ‘I’m not really nervous about this decision. I absolutely believe it’s the right choice. I mean, all these lads are brilliant and we get on really well.’

‘Aw Liam!’ Zayn cried, reaching across the group to grab Liam’s chin. ‘He says the cheesiest things.’

Louis added, ‘He’s the Cheese-Meister, our Liam is.’

‘Mozzarella cheese,’ Liam said.

The camera man blustered. ‘But—you boys haven’t known each other very long, why would you think this was a good idea?’

‘We may have only met two days ago, but I ‘onestly wouldn’t want to go on ‘ithout them,’ Niall said. ‘I t’ink we’d all agree that we’d have loads more fun on stage with four mates, than by ourselves.’

‘It might not make much sense to the people at home,’ Harry said. ‘They might think it’s a bit strange for us to form a band, because to them, it must seem like a very random decision.’

‘We seriously all just clicked right from the start,’ Zayn said. ‘And while this is all, um, new to us…’

Niall laughed and ducked his head against Liam’s shoulder.

‘We’re going to do the best we can,’ Zayn finished, and he smiled into right into lens and wiggled his eyebrows.

‘That’s right. This is a brand new experience, unlike anything we’ve ever been through before,’ Louis said, before pausing. ‘Well, except for that one time—’

Harry freed his arm and slapped down at Louis’s crotch, making the older boy cut off and shield himself, grinning widely as Niall laughed out loud.

‘And there you have it, X Factor,’ Liam said.

‘That’s ‘vas happening!’ Zayn spread his arms wide.

Harry snorted as Louis cheered and clapped Zayn on the back as if he’d just won an award. Liam and Niall joined in, pushing by Harry to jump on Zayn as well.

The camera crew looked at each other like they weren’t quite sure what had just happened, but Harry couldn’t care less.

**1D**

The rest of their time at the boot-camp was different. Suddenly everyone seemed to be looking at them everywhere they went. The other contestants would look over as Zayn and Louis messed about in the waiting room, falling on the ground and pinning each other, trying to slap the other’s faces.

Harry caught heard one contestant say to another in an undertone, ‘That’s them, those boys there. They’re the ones who formed a group.’ He knew it was probably weird of him, but Harry felt more relaxed under the attention, like things were normal again.

The whole afternoon and next morning camera crews were constantly seeking them out, pulling them aside to ask more questions or just filming them being stupid. Finally it was time for the final results where the judges would announce who would be going on to their houses in the next stage of the competition, and everyone was lined up on stage. This time the five of them were standing with the other groups though instead of the under twenty-five boys. 

One by one the judges called out the groups going through; and the boys stood to the side as _Twen_ , _The Reason_ , _Diva Fever_ , _F.Y.I, Prince and Rogues,_ and _Hustle_ , all broke into loud screams as their names were called, and left the stage. Zayn’s hand tightened on Harry’s shoulder as Simon paused with the microphone next to his lips, all of their eyes fixed upon him.

‘And the last group going through… _One Direction_.’

‘YES!’

They all turned into a tight huddle, Harry getting squashed between Zayn and Liam, Louis and Niall’s yells splitting his ears. They’d made it.

**1D**

Leaving the others at the Wembley Arena was a special kind of torture all by itself. Even though he knew it would only be a week until they all got back together at his step-dad’s bungalow, it felt like stepping out alone into an abyss without them. Finally getting home wasn’t much better either. Harry felt like a fraud when he told his Mum the news they were through, trying to stutter through her questions about why they decided to form a band.

‘You could’ve made it solo, though. You had as good as chance as anybody else, why didn’t you try?’ she said once he was home and had hugged her.

‘I know I can do well in a band. You’d like them, Mum, I promise.’

‘But you tried the band-thing with _White Eskimo_ , and that fell apart because you boys all decided to do different things as you grew up. That could happen again with this new group—what did you call yourselves? One Deflection?’

‘ _Direction_ ,’ Harry rolled his eyes. ‘Come on, Mum. Just trust me, we’ll be fine.’

‘I do trust you, baby,’ she said, hugging him again, but her expression was still uneasy.

Sitting around in quiet Holmes Chapel was strange for Harry, and throughout the whole next day he felt like he was itching out of his skin to do something. He was so used to being so on-the-go everyday now; getting up at six or seven, going straight into interviews, or sound-checks for a gig that night, or being hustled onto a plane, that it was killing him to just sit at home playing FIFA with his sister nattering away on the phone next to him.

He’d already organised everything with his step-dad for everyone to arrive at some point at the bungalow the next week, and now he had literally nothing to do but eat. He was currently on his third biscuit when a knock came at the door in several quick taps, like the person was in a hurry.

Frowning, Harry put the biscuit down and went over to the front door, making out a blurred shape through the long window-pane alongside the door. He opened the door, and stared as the person outside turned around.

‘Louis?’

Louis looked like a frozen tortoise with a big puffy parker that covered his neck, his eyes standing out like ice chips beneath his beanie. Louis flashed him a sharp smile. ‘Heya, Hazza. Thought I’d drop by.’

Harry frowned. ‘What? From Doncaster?’

Louis just looked at him.

‘Okay then,’ Harry said slowly, moving back and letting him in to the warmth of the house.

Louis stripped off his coat and hung it on the rack by the door, kicking off his wet shoes without being asked.

‘Harry?’ Harry’s mum called, coming out of the kitchen. ‘Was someone at the door? I thought I heard—’

She stopped on spotting Louis, looking from him to Harry and back again. ‘Oh, hallo, who’s this?’

‘Mum, this is Louis. One of the boys I met at the X Factor boot-camp.’

Louis gave an automatic smile that didn’t quite reach his eyes, and Harry paused, looking at him.

His Mum began firing questions for the next ten minutes, and Harry watched Louis closely the whole time. Louis looked tired, and while he was trying to make an effort at being his usual exuberant self, Harry knew him well enough to tell there was something off beneath that. So when his Mum offered Louis a cup of tea, Harry cut in saying they have some later, and pulled on Louis shirt to tug him to his room. Louis’ shoulders relaxed a little, and Harry felt a little guilty as he realised it must have been hard for Louis to pretend he’d never met Harry’s Mum before.

Harry wrapped an arm around Louis waist once down the hallway out of sight of the kitchen, and pushed him inside his bedroom, turning to close the door quietly behind them. Once inside, Louis stood still in the middle of his room, just looking out the window at the grey daylight outside and not making an effort to move.

‘Lou.’ Harry came up behind him and placed a hand on his back.

Louis glanced over his shoulder; the corners of his mouth were turned down. ‘How do you do it so easy?’

‘Do what?’ Harry frowned, rubbing Louis’ back.

‘Act as if everything’s normal with your family. I couldn’t—’ Louis shook his head, and sunk down next to Harry’s bed with a sigh, bringing his knees up to his chest.

Harry pulled his desk chair forward, sitting down and leaning over Louis. ‘I’m not doing it easy. It’s like, I feel sick inside, every time I have to lie or whenever I think... am I doing this right? Is this how I would be back then? I don’t know. I keep thinking they’ll figure it out, that they’ll know I’m not the same.’

Louis looked up at him, strands of hair that had escaped from under his beanie falling into his eyes. ‘The twins look like little girls. They’re so small—it kind of feels like it’s not them.’ Louis smiled as if to say how ridiculous he thought that was.

Harry saw the hurt he was trying to cover up though, and he placed his hand on Louis knee, grabbing the back of Louis neck with the other, and bending forward to touch their foreheads together.

Louis made a small sound. ‘God. Such a stupid thing to wish for, to come back here.’

Anger sparked in Harry and he dropped a kiss on Louis’ cheek, and then his jaw, speaking between them. ‘It’s not—your fault.’

He yanked sharply on Louis’ hair poking out from under the beanie, making Louis whine.

‘ _Harry,_ ’ Louis whispered, pushing closer and closing his mouth on Harry’s neck, biting down hard into the skin.

Harry’s whole body tensed at the pain, the instinct to get away shuddering through him, but he clung to Louis and didn’t move. His hand clenched tight on Louis’ knee and he hugged Louis harder, holding his breath, until finally Louis released him with a soft gasp.

They sat quiet for a minute. The wet skin on Harry’s neck tingled every time Louis blew out air.

‘Stay here tonight,’ Harry said into Louis shoulder. He felt Louis close his eyes when his eyelashes brushed Harry’s cheek.

‘…okay.’

**1D**

Harry made Louis call his family so they wouldn’t worry at his sudden disappearance, and Louis stayed the night, sleeping on the spare mattress. Harry convinced him to return home the next day, with the promise that he’d call Harry as soon as he did. Harry kept close contact with all the boys for the next week, but he still missed them terribly, and he used up almost all his phone credit that week texting everyone so much. Finally the day came when they all arranged too meet up again at Harry’s house and stress, that Harry hadn’t even realised he had, alleviated as one by one they arrived.

‘Niall’s here!’ Liam called, looking through the front curtains.

Zayn leapt up from where he’d been sprawled in front of the television. ‘Niall!’

Harry and Louis dropped the controllers of the game they were playing, and they leapt over the couch for the front door. Harry rushed out of the house to where Niall was pulling his bag from the boot of the taxi, and smashed into him.

Niall laughed and hugged him back. He was the last to arrive since he’d had to fly over from Dublin, but now finally they were all back together. The others crowded in around them making such a loud noise that it caused Harry’s neighbours to look over, wondering what was going on. Behind them, Harry could hear his Mum and step-dad laughing from the door-step as the boys jumped around in a huddle of clutching arms, shouting their heads off.

Harry looked up, flipping his hair out of his face and grinning over at his Mum, like _see, it’s fine._

**1D**

‘Oh, I’ve missed this place,’ Louis said, chucking his bag unceremoniously onto the floor of the bungalow at the bottom of the Harry’s garden. He flopped onto the couch, rubbing his hands over the armrest. ‘Hello there, comfy cushions.’

Liam laughed as he set his bag down more carefully. ‘Should we be leaving you and the couch alone?’

‘Yes please. Thanks, Liam, for understanding our need to be together.’

‘You’re a weirdo, Louis,’ Niall said.

‘And you’re only just realising this, now?’ Zayn said, grinning. ‘Where have you been the last two years?’

‘Nah-ah,’ Louis shot up, pointing at Zayn. ‘We’ve technically only known each other less than two weeks, so Niall is perfectly reasonable in his idiocy.’

‘You’re the idiot!’ Niall jumped on him, crashing his weight down on Louis’ legs and trying to squash him into the cushions.

Harry ignored Louis’ calls for help, and wandered into the small kitchen area. His parents had left them to their own devices once more, giving them free range of the bungalow with plenty of food stocked in the mini-fridge. This time the boys were going to stay for three weeks instead of two, leaving them one week back home again before they had to leave for the Simon’s house. It seemed so far away, but Harry knew the time would pass quickly now that the boys were here.

He opened the fridge and stared at the contents inside, not really seeing any of it. He could hear Louis and Niall in the other room still squawking and laughing, but he was remembering the last time they’d all come here for the first time; how nervous and eager they’d all been, wanting so bad to make this work and unsure if it could. This time there was none of that, and it was like those memories had never happened. They were rewriting their own memories in history, and for a moment Harry felt suspended between what was real now and what he thought was real.

A hand fell on his shoulder and he jumped.

‘Liam.’

‘Hey,’ Liam gave him a strange look. ‘Are you freaking out?’

‘What?’ Harry scowled.

‘Hey, it’s okay if you are, you know. You don’t have to pretend with us.’

Harry relaxed again, letting his lips spread into a smile. ‘And you don’t always have to be so smart, but there’s no helping that.’

Liam grinned back. ‘It’s both a gift and a curse,’ he said, letting his hand fall from Harry’s back as he bent closer to the fridge.

Harry shuffled aside and let him look, his heart a little lighter. Liam was good like that.

**1D**

The next week went by quickly like Harry thought it would. Last time they’d been here though, all they’d done was laze around playing games and swimming, occasionally singing, but mostly eating and sleeping. This time, none of them could sit still for very long.

Harry’s mind was almost constantly buzzing, and he had way too much energy and the others were the same. If one of the boys wanted to go somewhere, for a run or go bowling or just to the park to kick a ball around, the others were usually all up for it. The didn’t go to the cinemas much because they’d already seen all the ‘new’ movies worth watching, and Liam bemoaned that it going to be that way for the next two, nearly three, years.

Harry’s parents were surprised at how active they were all being, but the bungalow was far enough from the main house that the noise couldn’t be heard whenever the boys got really restless and loud. Harry didn’t mind because he was feeling the exact same impatience, and it was nice to have company whenever he wanted to work off some of his energy through a quick workout regimen. They sang a lot more as well, rehearsing the songs they’d done over the whole live shows, talking about things they’d do differently if they had to perform them again.

Each day they pushed themselves until they were exhausted, and it was after one such day that they found themselves in the living room of the bungalow. Harry was sprawled on the foam mattress they’d hauled in here, with Zayn near him, idly pressing buttons on his phone. Liam was curled up on the corner of the couch in a hoodie, and Niall was squashed in next to him with a thick woollen blanket tucked around his lap. Louis was lounging in a chair on Harry’s other side, wiggling a finger in his cup of tea, and making the liquid ripple.

‘Do you really think that we’re gonna have to do this all again?’ Zayn asked suddenly.

Harry tilted his head back, looking at Zayn from upside down. ‘What?’

‘Like twitter and everything. Getting millions of followers again, doing all the same interviews with the same questions…’

Louis scoffed. ‘Like the questions were ever going to change much anyway.’ His voice went high-pitched, and he parroted, ‘what’s your celebrity crush? What do you think makes a girl beautiful? What makes each other beauti—?’

‘Okay, we get it, Lou. Shut up,’ Zayn said, throwing his phone at Louis crotch and missing.

‘The point is, my friend, that yes we do.’

Zayn bit his lip and turned away from Louis, and suddenly Harry just wanted to be closer to him.

Harry pushed up and crawled half over Zayn’s body, who _oofed_ as Harry settled down on top of him. He tucked his head under Zayn’s chin as the other boy’s arms came up around him.

‘Harry,’ Zayn sighed, dragging his thumb over Harry’s shoulder. ‘Look, I’m fine. I don’t care that we may have to do all of this again. These were some of the best years of my life, I can deal.’

‘Well, that’s a very mature attitude to have,’ Louis said, lolling backwards in his chair, expression carefully blank as he watched Harry cuddle closer to Zayn.

Zayn just gave Louis a lazy middle finger in reply.

‘To be honest, I think it’s actually been good in a way,’ Liam said.

Niall rolled over, his eyes squinting at Liam in disbelief. ‘How can you o’ all people say that?’  

‘I just… the whole time we’ve been here, it’s like we’re separate from everyone else. I mean before we were all pretty close, but this time it’s different. I know it’s kind of corny, but it’s like—us against the world. Or is that just me?’

Harry leaned his head to peer over at Liam. ‘Do you really think so?’

‘I t’ink it would’ve been impossible for us not to be different,’ Niall said.

‘Yeah,’ Zayn said, absently running his hand up and down Harry’s arm. ‘It could have easily gone the opposite way, though, and driven us apart.’

Niall frowned.

‘Since the change is so massive,’ Zayn continued, on seeing the others’ expressions. ‘From going like we were, back to practically nothing, but no longer being the same people we were then. I think mentally, it would put a lot of pressure on anyone, and it’s pretty amazing that we’ve managed to stay together throughout it.’

‘Yeah, but without _this_ ,’ Liam said, gesturing to all of them, ‘I wouldn’t be dealing with the reality of the situation so well. It was such a beyond strange thing to happen, but I think it was good because it brought us that much closer.’

Harry hummed. ‘For me, I always thought of you as my brothers before, but that word isn’t enough to describe it now because it feels more than just that. It’s more like… the five of us are in this bubble and the rest of the world are outside it.’

‘I’ve always felt like that though,’ Louis said, biting his thumb and shrugging. ‘When it’s all five of us in the same room, it’s like we’re all that matters in the world. I’m not saying I don’t love my family and all, but.’

‘It’s different. Things are different when it’s just us,’ Harry said, eyes on Louis even as Zayn pulled him closer.

Louis smirk was small. ‘You got it, Curly,’ he said softly.

**1D**

A week later, it was getting closer to the time when everyone would go back home.

All the boys were starting to get really antsy after staying in the same place for so long, and everyday they had to find new things to entertain themselves. Harry, though, was having a problem of a different kind. He was lying back on his bed, flipping through pictures of the hottest birds he could find on the internet.

The rest of the boys were messing about outside, but he’d waved them off, really needing just some quality time. He paused on one interesting blonde girl, her large boobs falling forward towards the screen as she held a black pair of handcuffs with one finger, and he reached down to dip his fingers under his waistband as he felt that familiar warmth pooling in his belly.

The door banged open. ‘Hazza!’

‘Gah—’ Harry jumped, and his phone slipped from his fingers to thump to the floor as he whipped his fingers out from under his pants.

Louis dived forward onto the bed, kneeing Harry painfully in the gut. Harry coughed and wheezed for air, and Louis laughed at him, grabbing at Harry’s wrists.

‘Wh—what are you _doing?_ ’ Harry said as Louis yanked his hands up to the headboard.

Harry squirmed desperately, knowing that whatever Louis had planned wouldn’t be pleasant. His fears were justified when Louis leant forward, pulling at something black in his hand, and the loud sound of ripping duct tape tore through the air.

‘Lou! No!’ Harry renewed his efforts, trying to buck the other boy off his lap and tug his arms away, but Louis grip was like steel.

The duct tape was wrapped around his wrists and a section of the headboard, swiftly going around and over and under. Harry groaned and gave up fighting, letting his body go limp, and rolling his eyes to the ceiling as he just waited for Louis to finish.

‘Are you happy now?’ he asked, when Louis finally sat back to admire his work.

‘Very much so.’ Louis eyes twinkled down at him, and he poked Harry’s nose. ‘Don’t go anywhere now, Curly. I might come back in an hour or two if you’re lucky.’

With that, Louis slid off his lap and ran sniggering out of the room, leaving Harry staring after him.

‘You prick, come back! You can’t just leave me here.’

There was no response and the doorway remained empty.

Harry groaned, pushing his head back into the pillow and tugging fruitless at the ball of tape trapping his hands. They were truly stuck, and probably the only way to free them would be to cut the tape off. He raised his head to search the top of the chest of drawers on the other side of the room, spotting a pair of blue scissors sitting next to a cut open packet of batteries. Harry groaned again and shifted on the bed.

The worst thing was that he still had a semi from that picture of that girl, only now he couldn’t do anything about it. Harry ground his teeth together, trying to think of anything else to will his dick to calm down; however the girl with the handcuffs kept coming back. Thoughts like; what if it was her handcuffs trapping him to the bed right now, invaded his mind. What if she was leaning over him, her back arched and her arse in the air as she ran her fingers down his chest? What if those fingers reached into his pants as she whispered dirty things in his ear—?

‘Damn it.’ His pants were now uncomfortably tight and straining. He closed his eyes, willing it away and trying to distract himself with thinking how annoying Louis could be: holding his wrists down so easy, pinning Harry to the bed with his body weight, and shifting back and staring down at him. Licking his lips and telling Harry how good he was, sliding backwards down his body and dragging his finger-nails down Harry’s chest, settling them on the dip of Harry’s hips.

Louis’ mouth hovering over his pants, a wicked gleam in his eyes as he quirked his eyebrows like, _do you dare me_ —?

Harry sucked in a breath, eyes flying open. Okay. Don’t think of Louis. Think of that girl with the giant boobs who would have leant forward, chest bouncing into his face as she curled over his lap and—oh God, he was actually going to die if he didn’t touch himself soon.

‘Louis! Come back, you tosser!’

There was silence.

Harry let out a frustrated sound. ‘I have a boner!’

Louis’ delighted cackle came from the other room.

The door burst open again a second later. ‘Do you really? Oh my goodness, Harry, you dirty boy.’

‘I know, now let me go. Please.’

Louis looked far too gleeful as he came over to the bed, and Harry kind of wanted to punch him.

‘Do you have a bondage kink you’ve been hiding from me all this time? Does this turn you on?’ He leant over Harry, reaching up to put his hand on the ball of duct tape. His hair was falling into his laughing eyes, and his torso was a long line of muscle above Harry, his biceps flexing as he put weight on Harry’s trapped hands.

Harry had to speak through gritted teeth. ‘Lou, I’m sixteen again. Everything turns me on, all the time.’

Louis’ eyebrows went up and he grinned at Harry. ‘Jesus, you must be really hard up, huh?’ and suddenly his other hand squeezed Harry’s crotch.

Harry’s body clenched up, his hips instantly thrusting up as a strangled whine escaped him. ‘— _Lou_ , I’m not kidding!’ he gasped.

Louis laughed, releasing him but not backing off. ‘I guess it is really _hard_ not having all those girls throwing themselves at your feet.’

Harry glared at him, breathing heavy.

Louis leaned closer and whispered, like it was a secret. ‘Welcome back to the real world, Hazza, where your best friend… is your right hand,’ he wiggled his fingers in front of Harry’s nose. ‘Unless of course, you’re all tied up, in which case, you’ll have to make do with me instead.’

Louis’ hand disappeared down and sharply squeezed Harry’s cock through his pants again—and that was it—Harry’s head rolled back and he closed his eyes tight, his cheeks flushing red and his mouth opening on a wet moan as his body went taut. He tried to pull his hands free but the duct tape held them fast, and Harry’s balls were full and tight, and his hips just jerked away releasing it all as he pushed up into Louis’ hand.

Harry came down gasping, chest heaving as his arms were still stuck in the same position. He slowly opened his eyes to Louis stunned expression, staring down at Harry panting and flushed beneath him.

‘Oh, fuck. I didn’t— _fuck,_ ’ Louis whispered, his voice cracking. He yanked his hand back from Harry’s crotch like he’d touched something burning hot, holding it next to his own stomach instead, but still he didn’t move off Harry. His whole body had gone tense, but his eyes flicked from Harry’s eyes, to his lips, to his heaving chest and back again.

‘I tried to warn you, I wasn’t kidding,’ Harry said, his voice slower. He shifted, and sighed. ‘Could you let my arms go now? They’re getting sore.’

Louis continued to stare.

Harry whined. ‘ _Lou_ , please?’

‘Uh, right,’ Louis agreed, sounding faint. ‘Right.’

He pushed off Harry and stood up, turning around and staring at the room. Harry watched him for a second, waiting for him to move.

‘On the dresser,’ Harry prompted, unapologetically. ‘There’s scissors.’

‘Right,’ Louis said again, like it was the only word he remembered.

He moved for the scissors, snatching them from the dresser and hurrying back, only to stumble over a lone shoe on the carpet and trip forward, catching himself on the headboard. Louis huffed out a breath, avoiding Harry’s gaze, and keeping his eyes steadfast on the ball of duct tape as he leant over to snip between Harry’s wrists. His hands shaking a little and it took him several goes at cut through the thick tape.

Finally the tape broke through, and Harry groaned as his arms were freed from the stiff position, letting them fall limply to the pillow.

Louis stepped back, licking his lips. ‘Okay, so,’ his voice sounded strained.

Harry rolled his head, languidly lifting his eyes to meet Louis’s.

Louis stepped back again, wrenching his eyes away and rubbing a hand over his mouth as he swallowed. ‘I’ll leave you to it then,’ he said, and was out the door quicker than Harry could blink.

‘Huh,’ Harry said into the silence. So that just happened.

 

 

[me](http://braincloud2.tumblr.com/)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Cheers, hope you liked it! All the love X


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Harry’s on tour and he feels on top of the world—until he wakes up one morning to find himself at the first day of the X Factor boot-camp, just sixteen years old again, and absolutely terrified that he’s just lost the last two years of his life.

Harry eventually sat up and shuffled down the corridor to the bathroom to clean up. For the next few hours, he stuck to his room and played games on his phone. When the words ‘Game Over’ flashed at him for the millionth time, he threw his phone away and fell backwards onto the bed, staring up at the ceiling.

He felt completely blank. He’d always known Louis was attractive, in an objective-third-party kind of way. Was he really just that horny that his body was getting turned on by anything that looked good?

Harry thought for a second. Yes, he had to concede, he really was.

Putting it down as a one-time-thing, Harry rolled from the bed, pushed his hair out of his eyes, and went back into the main room of the house. The smell of hot pizza was wafting through the air, and Harry’s stomach rumbled as he realised how hungry he was.

Liam and Niall were sitting at the cheap plastic table already eating, and Zayn was knocking around in the fridge. Louis was standing over by the counter, pulling pieces of pizza onto his plate, while chomping on another piece. Harry hesitated, and then shrugged off his thoughts, moving to Louis’ side and reaching up to the cupboard to grab a plate. Louis turned mid-bite and stilled as he caught Harry’s eye—before his gaze flitted away back to his plate, and pink colour crawled up his neck and over his cheeks.

Harry’s shoulder hunched a bit more as guilt wormed through him. The sounds of plates clinking and Zayn pouring juice into a glass were glaringly loud next to Louis’ silence.

The older boy turned away from the counter and went to sit on the couch with his plate, not saying anything about his flushed cheeks. Harry frowned at the pizza as he picked his pieces, trying to decide if he should talk to the other boy about this or not.

‘Harry, I know you like to move at a glacier pace, but I’m hungry, man,’ Zayn said, bumping Harry out of the way to get to the pizza.

‘Sorry.’ Harry moved back, and went to sit down next to Niall to eat.   

Afterwards, once the other boys had finished and moved off, Harry quietly put his plate in the sink, eyeing Louis, now lying longways along the sofa and staring impassively at the television. Harry came up behind the couch, placing his hands on the armrest and leaning forward till he was looking at Louis upside down. The older boy’s gaze was drawn to him automatically—his expression not changing except for a slight raise to his eyebrow.

‘Are we okay?’ Harry asked.

Louis stared at him a second before he smiled sharply. ‘Why wouldn’t we be?’

Harry bit his lip, letting it slide slowly from his teeth. ‘…you seemed kind of bothered about earlier.’

‘Well, I’m not.’

Harry blinked at him, not sure what to say.

‘ _What?_ Why are you looking at me like that?’ Louis scowled, and shifted on the couch. ‘Fuck, you’re irritating sometimes.’

Harry didn’t react. ‘I just want you to know that I’m not embarrassed about it.’

Louis just rolled his eyes. ‘Ugh, of course you’re not. When do you ever get actually embarrassed about anything? You’re shameless, is what you are.’

‘There’s nothing to be ashamed about. It’s just natural.’

‘Really? So accidently getting a mate off is completely natural for you, is it?’ Louis sat up suddenly, higher than Harry.

‘Uh, no.’ Harry stared up at him, not moving from where he was bent over leaning on the armrest.

‘This is giving me a headache,’ Louis sighed. ‘Can we just leave it alone, now?’ Louis waved his hand, brushing him off, and Harry’s mouth set in a line.

‘Fine.’ He pushed forward, his lanky form tumbling over the armrest and straight into Louis’ lap.

Louis small sound of surprise quickly changed to a shriek as Harry finger’s found his side and dug in. Louis twisted and yelled trying to escape Harry’s prodding fingers, his hands coming up as he tried to shove Harry off his lap, but Harry held on tight, burrowing his fingers deeper beneath Louis’ ribs and making the other boy gasp and laugh as he curled in to save himself.

‘You—cheeky bastard, that’s cheating!’ Louis laughed, and finally managed to roll them both of them couch.

Harry hit the floor, grinning even as Louis tried to get his revenge with fingers far more devious than his own, but Harry didn’t really mind.

**1D**

‘You need to get a hair cut.’

‘It’s fine, Mum.’

‘It’s turning into a wild mane—how do you manage it like that? You’re constantly having to push it out of your face. Just get a hair cut tomorrow morning, I can book you in easy.’

‘I like it this way.’

‘Do you want this shirt? Remember you’re going to be on telly, and really, what will Simon think if you go up there like a mangy cat from the streets? Think of what all the girls will say.’

‘…the girls love my curls.’

‘Do you want the white shoes, or the brown ones? Sorry, what did you say?’

‘Nothing. Look, I’ll put some wax or something in it so it doesn’t blow everywhere, but I’m not about to cut it short again.’

‘I’ll put the white shoes in.’

‘ _Mum._ I can pack my own bag, you know.’

‘I’m just making sure you’ve got everything. After all, my baby boy is flying to another country, so far away by himself…’

‘I’m not by myself, the others are with me.’

‘Oh, because you’re all _so_ responsible and mature now.’

‘We are though. Sometimes.’

**1D**

‘Niall farted! Everyone, Niall—’ Niall slapped a hand over Louis’ mouth to stop him shouting on the plane. The older boy struggled, before giving his hand a slobbery lick.

Niall pulled a face, letting go and wiping his wet hand on Louis shirt. ‘That’s jus’ gross, buddy.’

‘Why, thank you. I do try.’

All the groups were excited on the plane, people were talking loudly and smiling too wide, only a few of them staying quiet and stewing in nerves. Harry kind of felt sorry for some of them; their thrilled faces were hard to see, since he knew which groups had gone home last time. Although, there was a chance the three chosen finalists could be different this time round.

The other boys didn’t seem as bothered by this. Louis and Liam were both running on a high, Zayn was listening to music, and Niall kept getting up and moving from group to group talking to everyone who would hold a conversation with him.

All the days in the sun running around had done them all good. Harry himself, certainly had way more muscle definition than he remembered having last time. Also, they’d all tried to grow their hair back the way they liked it over the five week break; Niall keeping his blonde and shorter than last time, Louis had cut his into a slightly less professional version of the hair cut he’d had on their world tour, while Liam had tamed his, and Zayn had let his hair grow longer to gel it up.

Fingers came into Harry’s view, and flicked him on the nose. Harry wrinkled his nose, turning to see Liam leaning on the back on his chair.

‘Want a lolly?’ Liam asked pushing a plastic bag in Harry’s face.

‘Oh. Where did you get those?’ Harry picked one out and examined the sugar-coated candy.

‘Niall’s bag. Shh, he doesn’t know.’

Harry popped it in his mouth. ‘S’chewy.’

‘Sure is.’ Liam grinned.

He moved off to the other side of the plane where Zayn had stuffed himself next to the window, and offered him the bag. Zayn frowned, shaking his head, and turning back to the window, and Liam’s smile dropped a notch.

‘Oi!’ Niall yelled, finally realising what was going on.

Liam’s grin returned to full force as he dodged Niall’s grab. He ran away down the isle, holding the bag out of Niall’s reach.

‘Hazza, Zayn’s being boring and won’t talk to me.’ Louis appeared next to Harry’s seat a moment later. Without waiting for a reply, he climbed over Harry and plopped himself in the seat next to him.

Harry chewed. ‘Uh. Ime eehing.’

Louis mouth twitched. ‘What did you say?’

‘Um.’ Harry twisted his lips, the lolly having stuck his teeth together. ‘Liham gahe me ah lawlly.’

‘What?’ Louis laughed, sitting up and half kneeling in his chair. ‘Let me see.’

He captured Harry’s jaw, pulling his head up at an awkward angle as he manoeuvred Harry’s face.

‘Loowi,’ Harry protested.

‘Come on, open.’ Louis eyes were bright with mischief, and he pressed his thumbs hard at Harry’s lips, trying to force him to move them.

Harry struggled to keep them closed for a moment, but he forgot to breathe through his nose, and choked on the candy. His mouth opened instinctively, and Louis’ thumbs intruded, filling his mouth and finding the sweet lump at the back of his teeth.

He choked again and slapped away Louis’ hands, pulling his face away as Louis snorted with laughter.

Harry’s eyes widened as he realised the lolly was gone from his mouth, and he turned around just in time to see Louis remove his thumb from his own mouth, and smirk as he chewed the stolen candy.

Harry gaped at him. ‘You—that’s disgusting!’

Louis swallowed in a satisfied manner before replying, ‘Now Harry, you shouldn’t talk about yourself that way.’

‘But—you…’

Louis’ hand found its way into his curls, but his eyes sunk down to Harry’s sticky lips. Harry noticed, and he licked them without thinking.

The hand in his hair paused against his neck, and Louis’ gaze snapped back up to meet Harry’s.

‘Okay. I don’t mind,’ Harry stuttered, staring into his friend’s darkened eyes, and really Harry didn’t even known what he was saying because his heart was beating too hard to think properly, and Louis had gone statue still next to him.

‘Ow, ow!’ Liam barrelled into Harry’s seat, startling them both as he tried to fend off Niall hitting him with a rolled up safety guide.

‘Niall. You shouldn’t hit Liam like that,’ Louis said, abandoning Harry and standing up to snatch Niall’s weapon away from him. ‘You should hit him like this.’

He cracked the guide down on Liam’s arse, making the boy yelp and dive away by two of the girls from _Hustle_. Niall gave chase and Louis clambered after them, leaving Harry to settle back in his seat. His mouth still tingled where Louis’ thumbs had pressed.

**1D**

Later that night, everyone settled into their rooms. Some of the older contestants had decided to have rival group bonding session over drinks, but since all of the boys were underage now, apart from Louis, they were staying in.

Harry brushed his teeth in the small vanity bathroom, pressing the towel to his face as he made his way out—and was just in time to see the hotel door shut behind someone disappearing outside.

Harry stopped and frowned. A quick check of the room told him Louis and Niall were giggling over something on Niall’s phone, and Liam was making a cup of tea at the little kettle of the kitchenette, which meant—Zayn. Harry chucked the towel back in the direction of the bathroom, before slipping by the main room and out the door after the Bradford boy.

 Harry found Zayn right where he thought he’d be; out the back of the fire-escape, caught between the cold bricks of the wall at his back and the sight of the stars above his head. The little red glow of a cigarette flared and the smell of smoke hit Harry the second he stepped outside into the warm night.

‘Zayn?’

Zayn didn’t looking happy to see him. ‘What? Can’t I just have a moment to myself?’

‘You smoking again?’ Harry stepped closer.

Zayn raised his eyes to the sky. ‘Yes, obviously.’

Harry stared at him. ‘You quit though. Right?’

‘Yeah, but I came back to a body that was still addicted, didn’t I?’

‘Have you been smoking the whole time we’ve been back? I never saw you at it, even at the bungalow…’

‘I’ve been trying to cut down and whatever, but I just can’t do that anymore, okay? Go back inside already, before the others start wondering where we are.’

Harry frowned. ‘Why?’

‘What?’

‘Why can’t you do it anymore? What’s going on?’

Zayn groaned and twisted away. Harry noticed the veins were all standing out in the boy’s arms and neck.

‘What’s the matter?’

‘It’s nothing.’

‘Tell me.’

‘Harry.’

‘Tell me.’

‘Fuck! It’s my Grandfather, alright?’ Zayn turned furious eyes on Harry. ‘He came with the rest of the family to see me off before we all left for the airport, and seeing him again was like—you don’t even know.’

‘Zayn…’

‘No.’ Zayn tried to breathe. ‘Just—let me. Please.’

Harry’s chest was tight. ‘But you shouldn’t… don’t like, hold it inside, because you know we’re right here, don’t you?’

‘Harry, just—!’ Zayn grabbed Harry’s shoulder and pushed him back in the direction of the door. ‘None of you have to deal with something like this. You don’t know what it’s like to see someone you love, and know that they’ll be—’

‘Zayn,’ Harry grabbed at the other boy’s arm as he nearly overbalanced. ‘Zayn—’

‘Just go, will you? _’_ Zayn shoved Harry hard off of him.

Harry sprawled backwards onto the concrete with a low cry, his elbows burning as the skin tore. He inhaled quickly and sat up, flipping away his hair to stare up at Zayn, breathing hard from the burst of adrenaline. Zayn stared back; expression twisted somewhere between upset and pissed-off. He turned his back on Harry, and threw the end of his cigarette away, before shoving his hands into his pockets and moving away.

A bubbling force of emotion rapidly exploded in Harry, and he was up on his feet and launching himself at Zayn, yelling at him, ‘You can’t turn your back on me and bloody tell me to leave. It doesn’t work like that!’

Harry smashed into Zayn’s back and latched onto his neck. Zayn buckled, before loosing a wordless roar and spinning to grab at Harry. He yanked at the arm Harry had around his neck, and elbowed Harry’s side—quickly detaching him. Zayn pushed him right back, until Harry’s back slammed into the wall, winding him.

Zayn shoved him harder into the bricks. ‘Why can’t you just fucking let it go? Why do you have to push and push until you break something?’

Harry gasped for words, the pain only fuelling his rage. ‘You think—I’m the kind of person to just leave my friends, because they tell me to?’

Zayn’s eyes narrowed, but Harry didn’t give him a chance to say anything.

‘Well, too freaking bad, Zayn! You’ve got me now, and you’ve got the others, and if you think for one second—that we’d just let you just hurt by yourself, you’re bloody wrong! I care about you, and you can punch me for saying it if it makes you feel better, but you’re an idiot if you think it will make me leave!’

The words hung suspended in the air.

Slowly, Zayn’s grip on Harry’s shirt lessened, and he stopped trying to grind Harry into the wall.

Finally, Zayn stepped back from him, his mouth stretching into a strained line. ‘I don’t know what to do. There’s nothing I can do to stop it or fix it.’

‘Then don’t think about it,’ Harry said, stepping forward and grabbing the back of Zayn’s neck. ‘Just let us all be there, alright?’

Zayn’s hand came up and dug into Harry’s curls, returning the hug as he sighed. ‘I’m sorry, I didn’t... You’re okay, aren’t you?’

‘Yeah.’ His breathing had calmed down again. ‘We’re both okay, Zayn.’

‘I swear, sometimes… it’s like you’re all that’s stopping us from falling apart.’

‘Nah,’ Harry said quietly, ‘that’s Liam’s job.’

A sound that was half sob and half laugh escaped Zayn, and a moment later Harry felt warm lips kiss the side of his head. The mumbled, ‘Thank you,’ was lost in his hair.

**1D**

They were up early the next morning and were one of the first groups ready, something which raised a few eyebrows from the X Factor staff who’d probably fully expected the boys to be the last to roll out of bed. _Belle Amie_ , the girl group who Simon had decided should be made to even out the numbers, was the last group to step into the hotel lobby, having taken the longest doing their hair and make-up.

The eight groups were led by the X Factor crew to Simon’s villa nearby, where the others debated about who their mentor could be, and the five boys hung at the back.

Soon enough, Simon welcomed them officially to his home for the cameras, before telling them how the process would go down. They would all be expected to give interviews and photo-shoots when asked, to follow camera directions for the video, and several other instructions that the _One Direction_ boys were well used to following. Finally they were told to do a sound-check with the two man band, who’d previously received the songs each group was performing, and after that they had the morning to themselves.

**1D**

Liam scooped up the ball and threw it with a powerful over-arm.

Harry rushed forward with the others, Zayn grabbing him and trying to hold him back as Niall and Louis jostled each other, each of them keeping their eyes on the chequered football soaring through the air above their heads. Clustering together with the group, Harry tried to jump to head the ball, but Louis had them all beat like usual, jumping almost a head higher than even Niall, and sending the ball flying back to Liam in the makeshift goals. Liam lunged—but the ball bounced off a bumpy patch of sand and went on a wonky trajectory through the goal marks—so he hit the sand instead.

‘Yeah!’ Louis crowed, jumping again and holding his hands up. ‘The Tommo rules!’

The _Belle Amie_ girls laughed at them from where they were sunbathing, and when Harry looked over he saw all of them were in their bikinis and sunglasses, watching the five shirtless boys playing.

All of the groups had gone down to the beach as they waited their turns to be called up by the X Factor crew. Some contestants had gone swimming but most, including the boys, had decided to stay dry as they waited for their turn. The five of them didn’t want to risk another fiasco like last time with Louis getting stung by a poisonous sea urchin, and Louis definitely did not want to go through that pain again, so instead they had bought a football from a nearby store and started a game.

Liam picked up the ball and kicked it away to Zayn at the back. Zayn caught it with his knee and swiftly passed it away to Niall, who raced away with Louis fast on his heels. Niall rolled the ball between his feet as he spun around to keep Louis from touching it. He walloped the ball with a giant kick just before Louis tackled him to the sand, but Liam punched the ball away from the goals with a move more like a champion boxer than football player, and Harry couldn’t help laughing at the pleased look on Liam’s face.

A tanned arm caught around Harry’s neck, and he turned to meet Zayn’s smile—smaller than usual but still there—and his own smile spread wider into his cheeks in response. He put his arm on Zayn’s bare back and patted his side, before turning back to the game.

Louis had picked up the ball and was trying to see how many times he could bounce it on his knee as Niall tried to kick it away from him. Finally he booted it high enough that Niall leapt and kicked out like a bloody kangaroo—and the ball went soaring straight by a laughing Liam through the goals.

Both Niall and Louis threw up their arms and cheered, beginning to dance in the bright sunlight and sand.

‘When I walk, in the spot, this is what I see!’ Louis shouted, rolling his hips.

‘Yeah!’ Niall laughed, joining him.

‘Everybody stops and they staring at me!’

‘Okay,’

They sang together. ‘I got passion in my pants, and I ain’t afraid to show it! Show it! Show it! _I’m sexy and I know it._ ’

Niall ran his hands down his torso slowly, body writhing, and Louis pushed up close to him, his muscles rippling and his arse stretching the material of his shorts with every seductive roll of his hips.

‘Wiggle, wiggle, wiggle, wiggle—yeah! Wiggle, wiggle, wiggle, wiggle—yeah!’ They both started doing some weird chicken movement with their arms and shaking their butts, and Harry could hear the girls catcalling and laughing from off to the side.

He looked over at them, but the glint of an X Factor camera from the ridge above caught his eye instead. Harry grinned, thinking that this would definitely find its way onto the internet.

Louis and Niall’s song cut off suddenly. Harry turned back around to see Liam grabbing the other two boys, his expression deadly serious as he whispered something to them both.

‘What’s going on?’ Harry asked Zayn.

Zayn just shrugged in answer, and they moved closer to the other three. Harry repeated his question there, looking from Liam’s peeved face to Louis and Niall’s sheepish ones.

‘That song isn’t out yet,’ Liam said, scowling. ‘We have to be careful, or people will start asking awkward questions.’

‘Oh,’ Harry blinked. ‘That’s not good.’

He turned around to check on the X Factor camera, which was now panning across the landscape.

‘You know,’ Harry said slowly. ‘I hadn’t thought about it much before, but if we got to the X Factor house again, we’d have to watch what we talk about all the time. The cameras would be on us from when we wake up till late almost everyday.’

Niall groaned. ‘I jus’ kno’ I’m gonna be terrible at that.’

‘Yeah,’ Louis slumped on Liam, pulling a face. ‘We’ll have to remember what’s out and what’s not, and censor every conversation about movies, television shows, games, songs, news—Christ, the list goes on and on.’

‘Well, we can only try our best,’ Liam said, biting his lip.

‘Yeah, but there’s only so many times we can slip up before someone picks up something’s off,’ Zayn said.

Louis nodded. ‘It’s inevitable, really. We’re doomed.’ He winked at Harry—and a fluttery rush went through his belly.

‘Yep,’ Harry said. ‘Definitely doomed.’

**1D**

He both loved, and couldn’t stand, the wait before a huge performance. Even though they’d just be singing in front of a few people instead of thousands, the fizzing storm of energy and nerves in his stomach was exactly the same. He could see in the others eyes that they were similarly caught up in the feeling.

This song was such a huge part of them now. They had sung it all over the world to overall hundreds of thousands of people, and even though it was a cover song, it held such a large part of his heart, that he felt like it was theirs. 

‘Okay boys, you can go ahead,’ the crew member listening to their earpiece said, waving them on.

Harry took a deep breath to steady himself and followed after Niall, who was barely restraining from bouncing along the walkway to the pool area. Louis hand squeezed Harry’s shoulder, and when he looked back, the older boy flashed him an excited smile. 

Simon and Sinitta came into view, relaxing by the pool side; Simon with his large reflective sunglasses, and Sinitta with her chocolate skinned legs that went on forever.

‘Hallo!’ Niall said cheerfully as he reached the terrace first. He nodded at the two band members. ‘How’s it going?’

The guys on the keyboard and guitar amusedly returned the greetings, making Harry wonder if any of the other groups had even acknowledged the instrument players. Then he was stepping in front of Simon and had no more time to think about anything else.

‘Hello boys. How are we doing today?’ Simon asked.

Harry looked at the others, seeing that zing of déjà vu reflected in each of their faces.

‘Great.’ Louis beamed. ‘We’re just great.’

‘Are you feeling confident?’

‘Yeah, raring for it,’ Niall said, hopping a little on the spot and bumping Harry into Zayn.

‘Okay. Well, good luck then,’ Simon said smiling, and he motioned for the band to begin.

The familiar notes started, and Liam stepped forward, his smooth voice floating through the air. ‘I thought I saw a girl, brought to life…’

Harry could see in his mind’s eyes the enormous crowds they’d preformed this song to; the huge arenas spread out before them, packed full with screaming people and flashing cameras. He loved that feeling so much, and he wanted it back so badly, he felt like the emotion was just going to burst straight from his chest.

He stepped forward boldly at his turn, eyes wide open and ablaze with how much he wanted this, and his words came deep with raw feeling from his throat. ‘There’s nothing left! I used to cry! My conversation has run dry! That’s what’s going on. Nothing’s fine, I’m _torn._ ’

The others came forward, each of them loud and clear and singing from the heart of their being.

‘I’m all out of faith! This is how I feel…’ Harry spread his arms out, laying the truth into his words. ‘Cold and I am shamed, and lying naked on the floor.’

A warm hand, Harry wasn’t sure whose, touched the small of his back—as if they could feel how he was pushing his soul into the words until it was flayed, and they wanted keep him balanced and secure.

‘Illusion never changed! Into something real… I’m wide awake, and I can see, the perfect sky is torn!’

Harry moved his body with the song and he could feel the others moving with him. With Niall thrumming with energy, Zayn closing his eyes as he sang high and rich, Liam strong and confident at Harry’s side, and Louis at the end, leaning forward into the song, before rocking backwards and throwing his head back without a timid cell in his body as they all sang together.

‘ _You’re a little late, I’m already torn!’_

‘I’m already, I’m already torn…’ Zayn sang in a silken echo.

‘ _Torn… Oh, torn…’_

[me]()

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, thanks for reading and Happy Christmas.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Harry’s on tour and he feels on top of the world—until he wakes up one morning to find himself at the first day of the X Factor boot-camp, just sixteen years old again, and absolutely terrified that he’s just lost the last two years of his life

 

Simon had curled his hand over his smile at the end of their performance, but he didn’t say anything to give away his reaction beyond that, and it drove Harry bonkers not knowing what the man really thought about them.

Now though, it was dinnertime and all the groups had come together for a huge banquet outside with different Spanish foods and dishes. The boys had straight away found their old favourites, with Niall grabbing a bit of everything and piling his plate up. Konnie from the Xtra Factor, had followed the groups to the meal and was making her way down the long table with a small camera crew, trying to get a short statement from each group. Some of the contestants looked a little taken back as the camera and microphone loomed over the table, and the more nervous ones barely touched their plates, not wanting to be filmed eating.

‘Oh, God, I’ve missed t’is,’ Niall said around his mouthful, closing his eyes in bliss. ‘T’at is good stuff.’

‘Is it?’ Harry leant forward and stabbed his fork into a piece of Niall’s chicken.

Niall yelped and he attacked Harry’s fork with his own, sending the meat flying and disappearing somewhere down the table. ‘Get your own food!’

Harry gave him a wounded look. ‘I just wanted a little bit.’

‘Come off it, you ne’er take jus’ a bit.’

Zayn snorted into his plate. ‘Harry takes it all.’

Harry shot him a look, before reaching over and slapping at Zayn with his sauce-coated fork, but Zayn deftly avoided it. Harry’s fork caught Liam’s face instead, painting sauce over his cheek. Harry choked on his laughter, even as Liam fixed him with a look that promised revenge. Right at that moment, however, Konnie and the camera crew arrived at their end of the table.

‘Boys of _One Direction_ ,’ Konnie started, and the camera focused in on them. ‘So, who’s going to be the pin up of the band? Who’s going to be on the front page of the calendar?’

‘Um,’ Harry tried to stop laughing.

Louis clapped his hand down on Harry’s shoulder. ‘It’ll be young Harry, here.’

‘Yeah, definitely.’ Zayn sniggered, poking Harry in the face. ‘It’s those little dimples.’

‘And t’e curls,’ Niall added

‘The curliest of curls!’

Three hands grabbed his head and rubbed it back and forth.

Konnie glanced between them and the camera to make sure they were filming that. ‘Are you comfortable, Harry, with becoming the new pin-up boy?’

‘That is such an objectifying term, Konnie,’ Harry said.

‘Cheeky,’ Louis scolded, and Harry smiled up at him.

‘Harry’s only going to do naked photo-shoots anyway,’ Liam said, having wiped his face clean with a serviette.

Harry nodded. ‘It’s true.’

And Konnie leant forward to ask another question, but the cameraman behind her pulled away, and she stopped reluctantly. ‘Oh, right, the next group... Okay, well thanks, boys!’

‘No, thank you, Konnie,’ Louis said, and she smiled back, completely charmed.

**1D**

Once back in their room that night none of them felt much like sleeping. Niall and Louis brought a twenty-pack of soft drink cans. Harry was sculling his third can, when Liam smacked him hard in the back, making him cough and spray half of it down his shirt.

‘Revenge!’ Liam said, dancing away from Harry’s retaliating swipe and hiding behind Niall.

‘Ugh. Thanks Liam. Yuck.’ Harry pulled the wet shirt off over his head.

A hand grabbed and twisted his nipple sharply as he dropped the shirt, and Harry yelped as Louis tackled him. Louis pushed him to the carpet and climbed on top of him, his knee digging into Harry’s crotch.

‘Ow! Watch it—’ Harry drove his body up, succeeding in slamming Louis down and rolling onto him.

Louis pushed back, laughing as he got his elbow up into Harry’s neck and forced his chin back, as his other hand clutched at Harry’s side, groping up until he got Harry’s nipple again. Harry tried to protect himself, but his distraction gave Louis the chance to shove him back, trapping him against one of the wooden legs of the bed frame.

‘Looks like I’ve got the upper hand, Styles,’ Louis whispered in his ear.

Harry jerked in surprise, his eyes shooting to meet Louis’ unwavering ones. Louis raised an eyebrow, and Harry panicked a little, right before Louis leant forward a _licked_ right across Harry’s mouth.

Harry spluttered and Louis rolled away cackling, bouncing away to hooking Zayn and Niall under each of his arms. Harry pushed himself to his feet, still staring at Louis’ back.

Louis laughed too loud at something Niall said, his hands not staying still for more than a second—tapping and pinching and rubbing whatever he was touching. Harry felt like complaining that Louis wasn’t playing fair.

‘Harry, catch,’ Liam called, and when Harry turned, he threw a new can of soda to him.

Harry caught it, and scowled. ‘You shook the can up, didn’t you?’ he accused.

Liam grinned. ‘Open it and find out.’

‘You tosser.’ Harry pegged the can at Liam’s head, but he ducked and it landed harmlessly on the bed behind him.

‘Hey guys,’ Zayn said from under Louis’ arm. ‘Wait, wait. Stop for a second, Louis. I wanna know, do you lot think the wait for the result tomorrow will be better, or like worse, from last time?’

They all thought for a moment.

‘I’d say better,’ Louis declared. ‘We know more of what to expect, and I think we are way too amazing for Simon to let go of.’

‘Nah, I t’ink worse,’ Niall said.

Louis narrowed his eyes. ‘Someone’s feeling rebellious.’

Niall laughed. ‘Nah, jus’ because the anticipation made the wait go really quick for me las’ time, but t’is time I kno’ how easy it could go wrong.’

‘Yeah, worse for me too,’ Harry said. ‘It’s too big for me to feel good about the wait.’

‘Oh, you’re a pessimistic bunch,’ Louis said, and he pulled backwards on Niall and Zayn, making them all overbalance onto the bed.

Liam sprawled back on one of the other beds. ‘Do you think we sang better than last time?’

‘Course we did,’ Louis scoffed.

‘I don’t want to get too cocky about it though,’ Harry said, sitting down on the floor. ‘Like, I don’t want to be thinking that we’re so much better than everyone else, just because we have more experience now.’

‘Yeah, but we’ve never thought that,’ Louis said, rolling his eyes. ‘The only people I think we’re truly better than right now, is our past selves, and that’s all that matters.’

‘Huh. Our past selves,’ Zayn repeated. ‘It sounds good when you put it like that.’

‘You know what sounds better?’ Louis asked, his knees bouncing. ‘Sneaking out. Like we did last time. I mean, last time which is now this time, so like we did in our present past time... but not this present, the other one.’

‘Don’t hur’ yourself, Louis.’

Zayn sat up. ‘Yeah, we had loads of fun last time in Spain, didn’t we?’

‘That we did,’ Louis said. ‘Who’s up for it then?’

Liam shrugged. ‘Alright, I am, I guess.’

‘Liam said _yes_.’ Louis punched the air, leaping up. ‘That makes it unanimous!’

Harry squinted up at him. ‘I’m pretty sure, that unanimous means everyone agrees.’

Louis ignored him, instead grabbing Zayn and hollering, ‘Tonight, lads, we’re going out!’

‘Tonight’s the night,’ Liam said.

‘Go out and smash it.’ Zayn grinned. ‘Like, oh my God.’

Niall leapt up, knocking into Louis and Zayn. ‘Let’s paint the town!’

‘Let’s do it, let’s do it.’ Liam joined them. ‘Let’s do it, do it, do it.’

‘Harry, you’re in, yeah?’ Louis twisted around to ask, squashed between Zayn and Liam.

Harry grinned as he shook his hair out of his face. ‘I gotta feeling—’

‘Woo-hoo!’ they all cheered.

**1D**

They snuck out quietly by the closed doors of the other rooms along the hallway and down the fire escape, making it out the back of the hotel where Zayn had gone the day before for a smoke.

As soon as they turned the corner to the street, Louis let out a shout and broke into a run across the dark street. The rest of them paused for only a second, before Niall let out a whoop of laughter, and they all sprinted after him. Louis leapt the small wall bordering the ridge before the beach, and dropped out of sight to the sand below. The four of them followed him without hesitation, hurdling over the wall and flying out into the soft sand.

The beach was empty except for the boys, with nothing but the sound of the dark waves lapping at the coast around them, and a sky of stars stretching above them.

Louis kicked off his shoes instantly, digging his toes into the cold sand. ‘How incredible is this?’ he said, and Harry could tell he was grinning in the dark.

‘Seriously amazing,’ Harry agreed, and Louis’ arm closed around his shoulders and pulled him in.

‘Hey, we should go find that twenty-four hour pizza place from last time,’ Zayn said.

‘Yeah,’ Louis said, before groaning. ‘Oh, where was it though, I can’t remember.’

‘It was down the beach a ways, I think. We’ll probably find it if we just start walking that way.’ Zayn pointed.

‘Alrigh’ I could go for some pizza,’ Niall said happily.

‘Is there ever a time you wouldn’t?’ Liam asked.

‘Maybe. But t’ere would ‘ave to be sex involved.’

‘Sex and pizza. Kinky,’ Louis said.

The five of them wandered up the dark beach together, and it struck Harry how they would’ve never been able to do this if they were still in 2012. It had been hard enough just for two of them to sneak out of their hotel rooms without their bodyguards or fans realising, let alone all five of them. Yet, here they were; Liam and Zayn joking and pushing each other near the water line, Louis’ arm still wrapped comfortably around Harry’s shoulder as they walked, and Niall just in front of them, singing ‘I Gotta Feeling’ under his breath.

Harry looked over at Louis, his eyes having adjusted to the dark, and he lightly squeezed the other boy’s side to get his attention. ‘This is pretty alright, isn’t it?’

Louis ran his fingers over Harry’s arm, and didn’t answer for a moment.

‘Lou?’

Louis cleared his throat. ‘Yeah, I think so.’

‘Oi! There it is,’ Zayn called, pointing up to a row of shops by the front, one of which has a glowing pizza sign stuck on the roof.

‘Excellent,’ Louis said, before pausing. ‘Hang on, someone brought money, right? Because I didn’t.’

**1D**

Luckily, Liam had the foresight to pocket his wallet before leaving, and Niall quickly deciphered the menu, ordering three of the most delicious pizzas Harry had ever eaten in his life. They all lounged back in one of the dark booths of the pizzeria, stuffed full and sides hurting from laughing too much.

‘Seriously,’ Zayn was saying, ‘she comes out holding these red panties up, and I’m sitting there like, thinking they’re for her.’

‘Oh, God,’ Niall gasped, tears leaking from his eyes as he collapsed back into the corner.

‘She’s offering them to me though, and I didn’t know how to tell her that I wasn’t into that kind of thing, so I just put them on instead.’

Harry had to rest his head on the table, his shoulders shaking, and Liam fell against laughing into Harry’s ear.

‘No, I seriously did,’ Zayn said earnestly.

‘We believe you.’ Louis laughed.

‘Why did you though?’ Niall asked, trying to breathe.

Zayn shrugged. ‘Cause she was hot. Also, they looked pretty good once they were on. She was one of the kinkiest girls I’d ever met.’

Louis eyes brightened. ‘Harry’s got an interesting kink, don’t you, Hazza?’

Niall groaned. ‘Yeah, we know. It’s exhibitionism.’

Harry hit him. ‘And yours is voyeurism.’

Liam snorted. ‘Voyeurism.’

‘No, no,’ Louis said. ‘I’m talking about his other kink. The one where he likes to be tied down.’

Zayn coughed hard, and leaned forward. ‘What? You’re into that?’

Harry smirked at him. ‘Yeah, with like the handcuffs and stuff. S’hot.’

Niall laughed again.

‘And how did you find that out?’ Liam asked Louis.

‘Well, I was a victim, wasn't I?’ Louis said. ‘We were just messing about and I, all innocent and naive, tied him up. The next thing I know, Harry has a boner and he comes in his pants like he’s twelve or sixteen years old.’

‘You caught me mid-wank!’ Harry protested. ‘And it only happened because you kept touching my crotch.’

‘Innocently touching, though,’ Louis said.

‘What? Seriously?’ Zayn eyes were huge. ‘Louis got you off?’

‘By accident,’ Harry groaned to the ceiling. ‘It was an accident.’

‘This ac’ually happened?’ Niall asked, looking from Harry to Louis and back again. ‘For real?’

‘It really did,’ Louis said.

‘But, wasn’t it—’ Liam flushed a little, ‘—you know, weird?’

Harry shrugged. ‘I liked it.’

Louis snorted. ‘That’s because you were the one getting your rocks off.’

A strange, weighty atmosphere came over the table and they fell silent.

Harry looked from Zayn’s wide eyes, flicking from face to face, to Liam’s red cheeks, and Niall’s open mouth—and he sighed, exasperated. ‘I was horny, okay? It’s not easy being sixteen again. I don’t remember it being this bad last time.’

Louis arched an eyebrow. ‘Lucky you have me to get off on, then.’

‘Harry’s right, though,’ Niall said, ‘about it being tough to be sixteen again. I swear I’m getting chafed from jerking off too much.’

‘Ask Louis to give you a hand then, he’s really good,’ Harry said.

Louis gave a strangled laugh, and he reached over to whack Harry on the head.

‘I can’t believe you said that.’ Liam put his head in his hands. ‘Now I have _images_.’

‘You think you have images,’ Louis said. ‘I’m the one who knows what Harry’s face looks like when he comes.’

Everyone groaned loudly, and Zayn pressed his hand over Louis’ mouth. ‘Just stop already.’

‘Please,’ Harry added.

Louis’ eyes glittered at him from across the table.

**1D**

They finally started walking back down the beach not long after that. The air outside was still fairly warm, with only a light breeze shifting the water and ruffling their clothes. Despite it being nearly three in the morning, Louis and Niall were still running high on energy, and Harry could barely keep up with them, hanging back instead with Zayn and Liam.

‘So, what’s your kinkiest thing, Liam?’ Harry asked.

Liam rubbed his nose. ‘Uh.’

‘What?’ Zayn smiled.

‘You’re gonna laugh.’

‘Nah, we won’t. Promise,’ Harry said.

Liam huffed. ‘Okay. Well, there was this one time…’

‘Yeah?’

‘This once where Danielle dressed up as cat-woman, and I was dressed as Batman—’

Harry and Zayn cracked up laughing.

‘—shut up, oh my God. Why did I even say anything?’

Eventually, Harry calmed down enough for a concerned thought to occur to him. ‘Hey, how are you going with that anyway?’

Liam looked at him, smile fading. ‘With Dani? All right, I guess. I mean, time heals all and the rest of that.’

‘Do you think you’ll get back with her?’ Zayn asked gently.

Liam frowned. ‘Maybe.’

‘Zayn! Zayn!’ Louis bellowed from further up the coast, and he shouted something else as well, waving his hands.

‘What?’ Zayn called back.

Louis threw his arms into the air in a way that clearly said Zayn was being hopeless. He said something to Niall and the two of them started running back.

‘All night!’ Louis shouted again once he was closer, and then he barrelled into all three of them. He caught Harry’s waist, and Harry found himself being spun about as Louis sang, ‘I wanna stay up all night and jump around, until we see the sun!’

‘Louis no,’ Harry laughed. ‘We can’t.’

‘But, _Harry_. I’m still wide awake,’ he whined, grabbing Harry’s cheeks and pinching hard.

‘Are you crazy, what are you doing?’ Zayn demanded, grabbing Louis by his shirt collar and pulling him off Harry.

‘I’m not going to assault him, Zayn, you don’t have to get protective,’ Louis said.

Zayn stopped, spluttering, ‘That’s—what? No, I meant the song. You can’t do that, mate.’

‘There’re no cameras, Zayn, and absolutely no one else around, see? Sing with me! We’ve got the floor now, so get outta control!’

Niall hooked his arm around Louis’ neck. ‘I wanna stay up all night, and do it all with you. Up all night!’

‘Liam,’ Zayn appealed. ‘I’m right, aren’t I?’

‘ _Like this, all night—Hey! Up all night!’_

Liam smiled helplessly and Harry grinned, stepping forward to join Niall and Louis.

‘Yeah-e-yeah!’ Louis grabbed Harry again, twirling him about until the dark sand and stars blurred together. ‘I wanna stay up all night, and jump around until we see the sun!’

Liam pulled Zayn down into a headlock, but released him as soon as he struggled, laughing as much as singing. ‘Hold onto that feeling, and don’t let it go! Cause we got the floor now, get outta control!’

Harry swung Louis’ arms up and ducked underneath them, pulling him around, and the two of them nearly stumbled into the water.

‘I wanna stay up all night and do it all with you,’ he sang breathlessly, hardly able to take his eyes off the older boy’s smile.

Niall jumped on Louis’ back suddenly, and he let go of Harry to catch Niall’s legs. ‘ _Up all night, like this, all night—Hey! Up all night!’_

Niall crowed as Louis spun about and charged towards Zayn and Liam, crashing into them and taking all four of them down onto the sand.

Harry laughed, and went over to them as they groaned and tried to untangle themselves; Zayn yelling from the bottom that their fat was crushing him. Harry leaned forward, offering Niall a hand to get up, and really he should have known better. Niall glanced at Harry’s hand, before grasping it and yanking Harry down on top of everyone.

‘Ow, Harry!’ Zayn cried.

‘It was Niall’s fault,’ Harry said, shifting as Liam rolled over.

‘E’eryone always blames me,’ Niall said.

‘It’s because you’re Irish,’ Louis said, sliding down and settling his head on Niall’s thigh like it was a pillow.

‘Cause t’at makes loads of sense. And what’re you doing?’

‘I’m sleeping here.’

Harry sniggered. ‘What happened to staying up all night?’

Louis waved his hand idly. ‘Same difference. Now shush.’ He curled over, pushing an arm over Harry’s leg.

Harry looked at the others, and realised after a moment that each was waiting for someone else to protest. When no one did, Harry shifted into a more comfortable spot on Liam’s shoulder and sighed.

‘Just for a while then,’ he said.

**1D**

Harry woke when someone elbowed him in the eye, and he pushed the offending limb out the way. ‘Oh, God. Whose brilliant idea was it to sleep here?’

‘That would be mine,’ Louis said, voice muffled. He detached his head out from under Niall’s arm, hair sticking up. ‘The sand is not as comfy as I remember it being last night.’

Zayn moaned and shoved at Liam who was sprawled on top of him. ‘My everything hurts.’

Niall rolled over with effort. ‘I have sand all o’er me,’ he said, shaking his hair, and a shower of grains fell out.

‘What time is it?’ Harry asked.

Louis reached over and dug into Liam’s pocket, pulling out the boy’s phone. ‘Ugh. Early still.’

‘Give me back me phone,’ Liam mumbled, still half asleep.

‘We should probably head back,’ Harry said. ‘Someone might notice we’re gone.’

‘Good, because I don’t think I can sleep here anymore,’ Zayn said, stretching.

Harry sat up, blinking at the sun just peaking over the horizon and turning the sky pink. ‘It’s the day we find out if we’re through,’ he said.

Louis patted him on the shoulder. ‘Yes, Harry. Now, come on, I need a shower.’

**1D**

No one said anything about their disappearance, so Harry figured they’d gotten away with it. Not that they’d been forbidden from wandering around at night, but it had been implicitly assumed they wouldn’t.

The results of their audition wouldn’t be announced until late in the afternoon, so everyone just lazed about the beach for most of the day. Harry was too tired to worry much about the result, and by lunchtime, he was resting his head on a table in the sun, drifting in and out of sleep. Liam and Zayn had gone down to the beach for a brief swim, no longer concerned with missing the audition because of a sting from a sea creature, but Harry had stayed right where he was.

Niall and Louis wandered back at that moment, chatting loudly, and making Harry squint up at them. They both had vanilla ice-creams in cones.

‘Hey. Where’s mine?’ he asked, without raising his head.

‘You were sleeping. And you aren’t stealing mine, so don’t ask.’ Niall said pointedly as he sat down opposite Harry.

Louis perched against the table between them, looking down at the beach. ‘Where’s the other two fifths gone?’

‘Swimming.’

‘Without me? How rude.’

‘You’d gone off with Niall, though, hadn’t you?’

Louis twisted his mouth; looking from the beach, to his ice-cream. He turned to Niall. ‘I bet you I can eat mine faster than you can eat yours.’

Louis didn’t wait for Niall to answer—he just opened his mouth wide around the top half of the cone, and chomped down. A bit of vanilla ice cream leaked from his lips as closed his eyes tight and swallowed, before he opened his mouth once more and shoved the rest of the cone inside, barely even chewing before he swallowed.

‘Ah!’ he screamed, folding in half. ‘Brain freeze!’ He spun around in a tight circle, and then dashed off towards the beach without looking back.

Harry and Niall stared after him, stunned. That had been—yeah.

Niall made a small noise, and Harry turned back around to find the Irish boy had gone red in the face and he was staring at his own ice-cream, which was melting slightly over his fingers.

Harry huffed a laugh. ‘You too, huh?’

Niall jerked, and squirmed under Harry’s eye. ‘You saw what he did. And t’is wouldn’t be a problem if you lads hadn’t been going on las’ night about jerking each ot’er off.’

‘I didn’t jerk Louis off. My hands were stuck to the headboard.’

Niall groaned and shifted. ‘Shut up. I don’t like being sixteen again.’

‘Tell me about it,’ Harry said, fascinated by Niall’s changing colour. ‘Are you still going to eat that?’

‘Huh?’

‘Your ice-cream.’

Niall pressed his lips together, eying the cone in his hand like it had betrayed him. ‘No,’ he admitted, and he held the ice-cream out towards Harry for him to take.

The urge struck Harry, and without really thinking about it, he reached up and clasped his fingers around Niall’s wrist instead, rising up a little from his chair to curl his tongue over the ice-cream, green eyes fixed on Niall’s widening ones.

‘Uh,’ Niall said, going bright red and letting go of the cone.

It fell to the table top, splattering right across Harry’s cheek and ruining another of his shirts.

Niall choked out, ‘Oh, God,’ and then he was up and moving towards the public toilets. Harry watched him go, before looking down at the wasted ice-cream.

‘Did you drop it?’ Liam’s voice came from behind Harry

Harry looked over his shoulder and blinked at Liam’s dripping torso, before looking up. ‘Hullo. Louis went looking for you and Zayn.’

Liam blinked at him. ‘Uh, you’ve got—on your face.’

Harry sighed. ‘It was Niall’s fault.’

‘Sure.’ Liam patted Harry on the back, sitting down next to him, and putting his towel on the table. ‘Where is Niall anyway?’

‘He’s having a wank in the loo.’

‘Uh—really?’

‘Go look if you don’t believe me.’

‘That’s… um. You should probably clean up.’

‘Why? Is it bothering you too?’ Harry looked up at him.

Liam smiled. ‘Not really, no.’

Harry pushed out a breath. ‘Then what’s the big deal?’

‘Hi Louis, hi Zayn,’ Liam said pointedly.

Harry lunged for Liam’s towel, and wiped his face roughly trying to get it all off. He turned around finally, only to realise neither of the other two members were in sight. Liam laughed next to him.

‘That was a dirty trick,’ Harry said, the corners of his mouth twitching.

‘Yes, it was,’ Liam said. ‘You know, this has been really fun here.’

‘Hmm,’ Harry agreed, before biting his lip. ‘Liam?’

‘Harry.’

‘You know how we said things were different now? Like, between the five of us?’

‘Yeah, what about it?’

‘Could it be a bad thing too?’

Liam gave him a quizzical look.

Harry plunged on. ‘What if, we get so caught up in each other that we’re not thinking about stuff the same, and not thinking about other people the same? Like, would that be bad?’

‘Are we shutting other people out, who we wouldn’t have before, you mean?’

Harry nodded.

‘Yeah, I think we are.’ Liam frowned, and he looked sad for a moment. ‘What’s really bad, to be honest, is that I don’t miss it at all. Of course I miss our past life, and the people there, but… I don’t want the same interactions with people here, who don’t know this is the second time we’re going through this.’  

'Do you think it might twist us, as people, though? Would we start doing things we wouldn’t have done before, just because we’re caught up in this… bubble thing?’

Liam pressed his lips together, thinking. ‘Yeah, probably,’ he said eventually, closing his eyes.

And that wasn’t the answer Harry wanted at all

 

 

[me](http://braincloud2.tumblr.com/)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope everyone had an awesome Christmas, and thanks for reading.


	6. Chapter 6

All too soon everyone was called back to get dressed and ready for the final results of their auditions. The others messed about; Niall was bouncing in and out of the room, talking almost non-stop, while Zayn was freaking out about what to wear, and Louis started smacking him with one of his toms and yelling, ‘Vain Zayn,’ over and over.

Throughout this, Harry could barely speak, he felt like his stomach was trying to surge up and eat his tongue. Any scrap of serenity he’d had during the day had vanished, and he found he didn’t know what to do with himself. He knew they’d sung better than last time, but what if Simon decided he didn’t like it? What if he’d wanted that raw, inexperienced group they’d been the last time, and had no place for _One Direction_ this time? Harry honestly didn’t know what he’d do if they got sent home this time, because it wouldn’t just be embarrassing or a waste of a good opportunity; it would be soul-crushing, and far more horrible than anything else Harry had gone through so far.

‘Heya, Curly! You ready to go?’ Louis jumped in close next to him, rocking Harry as he wrapped an arm around his shoulders.

Harry looked at Louis, and his arm tightened .

‘Oh, Hazza,’ he murmured ‘Don’t be scared.’

‘I just—God, I want it so much, Lou.’

‘We’re going to be fine,’ Louis said. ‘We were great, and we are absolutely going through.’

‘You can’t know that.’

‘I do though. Look at me, Harry. You don’t know how amazing you were, how incredible you sounded when we preformed. They would have to be flipping insane not to take us through after the way you sang, trust me.’ He set his jaw firmly, his eyes dead serious, and it made Harry’s stomach fizzle in a different way, enough for him to calm down a little.

‘Yeah?’

Louis ruffled Harry’s hair. ‘Yeah. Now let’s get going, we have history to make. Or remake, depending on how you want to look at it.’

**1D**

The X Factor crew filmed the boys on the same wall as last time. Harry stared out at the swelling tide in the afternoon sun, barely even registering the presence of the camera as Niall leant against him, all warm from the sun, and Zayn’s hand absently skimmed through his curls. They had been asked to sit in silence, which Harry could do easily enough, but Louis at the end kept shifting. Every now and then, he whispered to Liam next to him, and Liam had to duck his head to try and stop giggling.

Finally the crew had got the shot they wanted, and they were brought down to meet Dermot for a brief interview.

‘So how are you feeling boys?’ The man asked, crouching next to the camera, out of sight of its lens as he looked from one to another. ‘Could you tell us what this might mean to you if you got through? How much do you boys really want this?’

Harry squinted in the sun to look at the others, and his chest tightened so much that it felt like his ribs were going to crush his lungs.

‘I think all of us feel the same way,’ he said. ‘For us, it’s not about just getting through to the next stage of the competition, because—when you want something with every fibre of your being, but a simple “no’ could mean the end of it all, while a “yes” could change your life into something beyond fantastic—it becomes overwhelming, and so much more than just a competition. It gets to the point where you can’t focus on anything else, except for how much you hunger for it and the people there with you.’

‘Harry,’ Liam said.

Zayn’s face was creased with distress when his hand grabbed Harry’s knee. Harry looked away quickly, realising half-furiously that his eyes had gone wet again as Niall patted his shoulder and Louis’ fingers dug into his curls.

Dermot whooshed out a breath as he turned away, blinking. ‘Okay that was, wow. Thank you, Harry. Wow, you got that, right?’ he asked the soundman.

The man gave him the thumbs up.

Dermot nodded distractedly. ‘Good, that’s good. Okay, well,’ he leaned back in towards the boys, and his tone was kind. ‘It won’t be much longer now. I promise, they’ll be ready for you to go in soon.’

The camera crew shuffled back, giving the boys some space, and Harry ducked his head under the weight of the other boys’ hands. Fingers pulled at Harry’s fringe, tucking it away out of his wet eyes, and he glanced up at Louis, who smiled down at him with a strangely intense look.

‘What am I going to do with you, Hazza?’ he asked quietly, but Harry couldn’t answer that.

**1D**

Simon was sitting just like Harry remembered under the shade by the pool, all the crew standing silent off to one side as the boys approached, the cameras following their faces. Simon smiled at them as they lined up, and Harry instinctively reached for the others against whatever was to come.

‘Hello boys,’ Simon said softly. ‘So, I want to know, do you regret not going forward as solo artists?’

‘No,’ they answered instantly.

‘Definitely not,’ Louis added.

‘Good, because I think the difference from your solo auditions to the boot-camp stage of the competition is phenomenal, although, forming a group out of essentially strangers was an extremely risky move to make. Now, you’re competing with a lot of groups who’ve been together a lot longer than you, and whether or not that risk paid off, well…’

Harry looked down the line of faces. They all looked as young as they had been last time, but he knew how far they’d really gone; so much further than just this.

‘The connection you boys have is genuinely incredible, so while my head is saying it’s a risk, my heart is saying that you deserve a shot, and that’s why it’s been difficult. But I’ve made a decision.’

Harry could feel his insides tearing, and Louis’ hand on his shoulder was branding into his skin from how tightly he was holding.

‘Guys, I’ve gone with my heart. You’re through.’

The boys exploded into sound and motion, and Harry’s head was ringing with Simon’s words even as the other boys slammed into him.

Harry shouted, and pulled back from the boys, he found himself rushing forward with Liam and Niall towards Simon. Simon was grinning wide, so happy to be giving them good news, and Harry loved the man so much for believing in them, and continuing to giving them a chance. He threw himself forward and clung to Simon in a hug that was joined straight away by Liam and Niall. A second later, both Zayn and Louis added their weight, laughing their heads off.

‘Oh, Jesus,’ Niall said, pulling back and turning to Liam. ‘When he started sayin’ something different, I thought for a second we we’re goin’ home.’

Liam’s eyes went wide, and he jumped on Niall, desperately pushing him away from the soundman’s microphone as Niall protested, and asking loudly what he’d done to deserve that.

Zayn came up and hugged him, and Harry hugged back, wrecked from all the emotions going through him.

‘Thank you,’ Louis was saying sincerely to Simon. ‘Thank you so much. This means so much to us, you have no idea.’

Simon was shaking his head, smile so wide it crinkled his eyes. ‘I am so impressed with all of you, I mean it. I honestly think you boys have something special, possibly more than anyone else here. I’ve never seen chemistry like the five you have, not in the outside world and not on the show. I genuinely think what you boys have is extraordinary.’

Harry’s heart thumped in his chest, and he couldn’t believe the praise coming from the other man, because it hadn’t been like this last time. Simon was grinning as he looked from one boy to another, but his happiness was tinged with something like awe, like he couldn’t believe they were actually real.

**1D**

‘Girls up and down the nation will be jealous of me right now. I’m on the beach, with five very handsome boys who will be going through to the live X Factor shows!’ Konnie said.

The five of them burst into enthusiastic yells, Harry nearly falling off the wall they were sitting on as Zayn grabbed him and screamed in his ear.

‘So boys, tell us what it was like becoming a group.’ Konnie smiled widely, offering Harry the microphone as he steadied himself.

‘Erm, well, basically we met up at my house after the boot-camp, and just kind of lived there together for three weeks.’

‘We mooched off him,’ Liam said, smiling.

Konnie leant forward like she wanted them to tell her a secret. ‘Were there any conflicts during that time? Be honest, now.’

Zayn grinned. ‘Louis and I decided we should wake Niall up this one time.’

Niall reached over and slapped Zayn in the chest. ‘Oi, I’m defini’ely gonna get you back, don’t you worry.’

‘What happened?’ Konnie asked, an eager gleam in her eye.

Louis shrugged. ‘We dragged him from his bed and threw him in the pool. His girly screams were more than worth it.’

Niall laughed. ‘You’re t’e one who screamed like a girl that time we hid all the Yorks’ire tea.’

Louis gave him a deadly look. ‘A man’s tea is no joking matter, young Nialler.’

Harry sniggered, and Louis dug his fingers into Harry’s spine, making him yelp and twist to glare at him.

‘So, by the looks of you, you’ve all grown pretty close,’ Konnie said, and Harry turned his attention back to her.

‘You could say that,’ he said.

‘We’re the best of friends, really,’ Liam said.

Zayn wrapped his arm around Liam’s neck and pulled him down till he was choking him, cooing, ‘Aw, I just love you, Liam.’

‘I—can’t breathe, Zayn—’

‘Alright, and just quickly now, whose got a girlfriend? Just say yes or no.’ Konnie leaned forward, and went down the line of them.

‘Nope,’ Niall said.

‘No,’ Harry said.

‘No,’ Louis answered softly

They all stopped, and stared at him for a long moment.

‘Er, no.’ Liam coughed.

‘No,’ Zayn finished sharply, brow furrowing as he stared hard at Louis, who avoided their eyes, still with that small smile pasted on his face.

onnie declared them all free for the taking to the public, before thanking them all, and wishing them good luck. There was silence for a second after she left, and then Zayn turned and punched Louis in the arm.

‘You never said anything, you dumbass,’ he accused.

Louis rubbed his arm, wincing. ‘Yeah, well you never asked, did you?’

‘You broke up with Hannah?’ Harry asked slowly.

‘Ages ago,’ Louis said lightly.

Niall scoffed. ‘That’s great, Louis. Now, I feel like a shit friend.’

Harry couldn’t agree more.

Louis frowned. ‘Don’t be stupid. It’s not even a big deal. It’s not like I’m cut up about it or anything.’

‘Then why didn’t you say anything?’ Harry asked, green eyes intent.

Louis glanced at him, and then quickly looked away, groaning. ‘I didn’t want you all to get like this. Honestly, it’s not a big deal. It sucked balls that I had to hurt her feelings, but I wasn’t about to lead her along when I no longer felt the same way about her.’

Liam pressed his lips together. ‘I suppose that’s good then.’

Harry wasn’t as convinced. ‘But didn’t you want to try with her again? Or are you still thinking about Eleanor?’

Louis flinched under Harry’s hand. ‘Can we not talk about her? I don’t want to talk about her on a day like today. I just want to enjoy the time we have left before I have to go back home to my stupid fam—’ Louis cut himself off, and pushed up away from the four of them.

Zayn was quicker than all of them, and grabbed Louis first. Harry was there a second later, blocking the way and fisting his hand into the older boy’s white shirt, his shoulders tense.

‘What are you talking about?’ he asked, voice low as Liam and Niall crowded around them.

Louis huffed a laugh, and tugged at Zayn’s unrelenting hold around his shoulders. ‘It’s not that bad—talk about melodramatic. Look, I think we should all cool down with a lovely swim before dinner. Who’s with me, yeah?’

‘Louis, come on,’ Harry said, hating that smile on the other boy’s face. ‘Why are you hiding? It’s just us here.’

‘I’m not—’ Louis laughed, turning his eyes from Harry’s to look out at the beach. ‘Christ, I’m not trying to hide anything. It’s not even worth talking about, is all.’

‘I think it is,’ Liam said quietly.

‘Yeah,’ Niall nodded, his blue eyes piercing. ‘Come on, Louis, we kno’ you.’

‘Oh my God.’ Louis heaved a massive sigh, before saying flatly, ‘Fine. Look, it’s just my family okay? I don’t like being with them and living in their house.’

‘What?’ Harry stared at him. He thought again about how they might become twisted from who they used to be. ‘No. You love your family, Louis.’

‘I do,’ he admitted. ‘But I hate them too right now. I hate watching their marriage fall apart again. I hate watching them pretend for the girls and for me that everything is fucking peaches and cream, and I really hate watching them try to forgive each other, and trying to make it work when I _know_ it’s a wasted effort.’

Louis turned his glare on Harry. ‘And why are you looking at me, like this is all your fault? You didn’t do anything. It’s not that bad. I’m fine, I got over it a long time ago. I just really hate watching it happen again.’

‘You should have said something,’ Harry spat out, and he let go of Louis stepping back. He pushed all his hair back from his face. ‘All of you don’t seem to get it. You keep hurting yourselves trying to hide everything, when we’re all right here to help you. I can’t take it anymore. Liam with Danielle, and then Zayn and now Louis—I swear to God, Niall, if you’re hiding something, I will lose my shit!’

‘Er, t’ink it’s a bit late, mate,’ Niall said, staring at him.

‘That is _not_ appreciated,’ Harry said, pinching between his eyes.

‘Okay,’ Louis said, pushing free from Zayn to hook an arm around Harry and pull him in. ‘Sorry. So, maybe we stink at dealing with this stuff, but we’ll try the best we can, just to stop Harry from going bonkers. Alright?’

‘Suits me fine,’ Liam said, smiling, the others echoing the sentiment.

Harry inhaled, pulling in the smell of the beach and cologne from Louis’ shirt. ‘Good,’ he mumbled, feeling drained. ‘We can go for that swim now, if you want.’

**1D**

‘Harry! Harry, come on, it’s starting! You’re missing it again—come on, you’re on the telly!’ Gemma screamed.

Harry ambled into the living room where his family were crowded around the television, watching the second boot-camp episode. He sighed at the thought of putting himself through another round of his family playing spot-the-boys, yelling every time one of them came on screen.

This had been going on all through the auditions over the last two weeks, with yesterday being the first of the boot-camp episodes. Harry had watched it closely, worried there would be shots of him freaking out, but thankfully whenever the camera caught his face throughout the first half of the episode, he just looked stressed, and throughout the second half, his sister had nearly killed herself laughing over his dancing.

This time, Harry just he slumped down on the couch and pulled out his phone, only half paying attention as he texted the other boys to ask what they were doing.   

_‘…and the boys’ category started off smoothly, with each of them singing to win a place for the judges’ houses_ ,’ Dermot’s voice-over carried around their living room, and several shots of the various boys singing followed. ‘ _But we soon hit a snag in the competition when it came to Harry Styles’ turn._ ’

Harry’s gaze shot to the screen, and his family held their breath as he appeared on the stage, the other four boys in tow.

‘ _Hello, boys. What’s the problem_?’ A wary Simon asked on the screen.

A sick feeling grew in Harry’s gut. He was idiot. How could he not think of this? ‘Viva La Viva’ began playing, and Harry sat in absolute silence as he watched himself launch forward on stage, throwing his whole body into the lyrics and moving automatically in time with the other boys. His eyes flicked from the television to his family, who had all gone very still. It was devastatingly obvious how different the five of them were from their earlier auditions—there was no way his family couldn’t see something had changed.

The song finished and the Simon thanked them, and Harry still couldn’t breathe. His Mum made a sound, and Harry’s eyes snapped to her.

She looked dazed. ‘How—’

‘ _Well, I’m Liam_ ,’ Liam’s voice came from the screen.

_'I'm Zayn_ ,’

‘ _I’m Niall_ ,’

‘ _I’m Louis_!’

‘ _I’m Harry, and we’re One Direction_.’

Oh God, this just kept getting better. Harry’s heart was pounding right out of his chest. The interview continued in all it’s life-wrecking glory as the five of them messed about, being themselves but also so completely different from what they had been like when they were actually sixteen, and Harry had no idea how he was going to explain this.

Finally the interview ended and the show went to a break. There was silence for a second as everyone turned to stare at Harry like his skin had gone green.

Harry shifted on the couch. ‘Erm…’

‘Harry Edward Styles, where did on earth did that come from?’ his Mum said.

‘When did you learn to sing like _that?_ You’ve never sung like that before,’ Gemma accused him.

Harry hunched down further. ‘Uh—’

His step-father shook his head. ‘That was—incredible, I can’t believe that was actually you. How did you do that?’

‘Uh, we were just messing about? Like, having a laugh on stage and enjoying the moment,’ Harry trailed off at his Mum’s puckered expression.

‘If you mean to tell me that you were putting your careers on the line for a laugh—’

‘No! That’s not what I meant.’

‘Then say what you mean, Harry. I don’t understand how you did that. That was just…’

Harry’s voice went smaller than he intended. ‘Oh. Didn’t you like it?’

‘What? No, baby, of course we loved it,’ his Mum said, her hand running over his hair reassuringly. ‘I just can’t believe… I mean, I’ve always thought you were amazing but not that amazing. You were—’

‘Brilliant,’ Gemma cut in coming over to the couch. ‘You’re actually, like, a superstar and you never told us, you prat.’

Harry smiled as she leant down to hug him. ‘The other lads bring out the best in me.’

‘If by _best_ you mean your inner _five year old_ , then I agree,’ his Mum said. ‘I can’t believe how immature you boys are on camera. I wish you’d at least tried to act like professionals on telly.’

Harry shrugged, falling quiet and feeling very much like he’d just dodged a bullet.

**1D**

‘That’s not yours,’ his Mum said the next day, just as Harry was about to disappear into his room.

‘What’s not?’

‘That jacket. I never seen it before, who’s is it?’

Harry looked down. ‘Oh.’ He tried to remember and thought it was probably Zayn’s, but Louis had been wearing it at some point. Also it smelled a lot like Niall. ‘I dunno. Louis’ or Zayn’s, I think.’

His Mum rolled her eyes. ‘Honestly, you boys.’

Harry grinned at her and slipped into his bedroom to find his phone lit up with a new text by his computer. He settled down at his desk and scooped up his phone, pleasantly surprised to see the text was from Liam.

_Have you checked twitter recently?_

Harry blinked at the words for a second. He closed the inbox page and tapped the twitter application on his phone, thumbing down through the list of tweets, not really sure what he was supposed to be looking for. Eventually he gave up and texted Liam back.

_What about it?_

He received a reply within seconds.

_You nong. Go to your profile page._

Harry obediently went back to twitter and tapped the ‘Me’ icon at the top. He stared at the numbers for a second before minimizing the page and calling Liam.

‘I know, right?’ Liam said on answering.

‘How is that even possible?’ Harry asked, pressing his knuckles to his lips. ‘This didn’t happen last time.’

Liam laughed. ‘Tell me about it. Wow. Over 100,000 followers and all that’s really aired are the boot-camp episodes and the Xtra Factor.’

‘But… didn’t it take us ages to get this many last time?’ Harry stood up, from his chair. ‘We were half-way through X Factor before we got this far.’

‘Right, well, you couldn’t have honestly expected it to be the same,’ Liam said.

‘Yes,’ Harry nodded. ‘I could have, actually.’

‘Harry. It’s already been really different, though.’ Liam huffed into the phone. ‘We changed how we got together, we’re performing differently, and we’ve been acting completely unlike we did last time on camera, well, this early on in the competition, anyway.’

Harry closed his eyes. ‘Stop being logical.’

‘Stop freaking out, then.’

‘I am not. It just didn’t occur to me before now, that things could happen this time with our fans that didn’t last time.’

Liam made a sympathetic noise. ‘Look on the bright side. At least we’ll all be together again soon. Just a few more days.’

Harry sunk down onto the bed. ‘Not soon enough, then.’

**1D**

They all stayed at a hotel in London for a while as the X Factor house was being prepared for them. It was brilliant seeing all the over finalists again in one place, but it was a bit strange also, and Niall in particular had to struggle not to give away how well they really knew these people. So as a precaution, they were staying more to themselves up in their room, as much to save themselves from mistakes as to save the other contestants ears. The five of them were so happy to be back together, that at one point, one of the assistants staying at the hotel had to come down to tell them to be quiet. They did try to calm down, but all it took was one silly remark to set them off again.

Harry laughed from the floor as Liam and Louis shoved all their weight into the door, trying to keep Niall from re-entering their room. Niall yelled obscenities at them from the hotel hallway, dressed only in a white towel after the other four boys had ambushed him coming of the shower.

A girl’s shriek came from the hallway, and Harry collapsed back into Zayn, just about dying as they heard Niall’s hasty apologies to the girl. Liam and Louis started laughing too hard to keep up the pressure on the door, and Niall shoved it open, slapping at every part of them he could get.

Louis made grabby hands at Niall’s towel, but the Irish lad leapt away over Harry to get to his pants, and Louis tripped on Harry instead.

‘Hello there, Curly, fancy meeting you here,’ Louis sniggered, fingers dancing up Harry’s sides.

Harry squawked and tried to squirm away, pushing at the other boy’s hands, as Louis held him tight. At last, he reached up and swiping Louis’ hair in all in the wrong direction, making him jolt back.

‘Foul!’ Louis cried, as Harry scrabbled up and escaped to the dark bathroom.

He had no time to turn the light on, lunging straight for the door and nearly managing to close it in time but then Louis’ hand whacked into the wood, stopping it short. He slipped inside after Harry, leaving the door open so that the light from the main room flooded inside, giving his eyes wicked gleam as he advanced. Harry grinned unrepentantly even as he backed away—right up until his back hit the tiled wall—and the air seemed to change around them, turning thick as Louis stepped closer still until their chests were almost touching.

Harry stared Louis’ face changed as he pressed closer, his eyes shifting all over Harry’s face as his hand came up to his jaw—and Harry couldn’t breathe but he couldn’t tear his eyes away either. Louis’ thumb pressed against Harry’s lips and dragged along, before lightly digging his nail into the flesh at the corner of Harry’s mouth.

‘Christ. I’m losing my mind,’ Louis whispered, his breath skimming Harry’s skin.

There was a churning burn of feeling spreading from Harry’s throat through his chest and right down to his legs. Harry hauled in air, and his voice didn’t sound like his when he spoke. ‘I’m right there with you, then.’

Louis’ hand tightened on his jaw and he leaned closer as if Harry was drawing him in.

‘ _Fuck_.’

His mouth captured Harry’s and he made a small noise, pressing up and opening beneath him. Louis pushed him back into the wall, his hand sliding around his side and fisting into Harry’s shirt. His mouth moved with Harry’s, slick and consuming, and it hit Harry in a punch how badly he wanted to taste all of him, and he pressed up and licked back. Louis’ fingers tangled with Harry’s, and all his veins were standing out in his arms and neck as he pushed down on Harry, teeth catching on his lip, making Harry gasp and jerk.

‘Lou—’

He could feel all of Louis’ muscles pushing up against him, all harder and stronger than what he was used to. He tried to suck in a breath and Louis pushed into his mouth, the smooth wet muscle of his tongue thicker than any girl’s, filling all of his mouth, and Harry’s jaw was straining to open wide enough as he pushed back with his own tongue. A powerful need shivered at the base of his spine, building to high heights, and his legs trembled beneath him as Louis pulled him in impossibly tight.

Louis pulled his mouth away, and Harry dropped his head forward to the other boy’s shoulder, pulling in a shaky breath that was full with the smell of Louis. He shuddered when Louis pressed his lips to Harry’s neck and sucked hard, before nipping at the skin and pulling away completely.

Harry collapsed back against the wall, and he tried to breathe after the rush pulsing through his body. Louis stumbled to the side, looking destroyed with his hair mussed, and his mouth red and open.

‘God,’ Louis said, voice cracking. ‘What the actual fuck?’

Harry snorted against the wall.

‘You—are you laughing?’ Louis asked, voice going scandalised. ‘This is a—a giant change in the dynamics of our friendship and you—’

Harry laughed out loud. ‘Oh God, your voice! I think I made you go through puberty again.’

Louis punched Harry in the shoulder. ‘Cheeky. You’re not that good, Styles.’

‘Yeah? Pretty good, though, right?’ Harry let his head loll back against the wall.

A thrill went through his body as the older boy’s gaze fell to the line of his neck. Louis leaned forward to flick the reddened patch where he’d been sucking, and Harry had to close his eyes briefly to get a hold of himself.  

‘Well, if you think so,’ Louis said.  

 

 

[me](http://braincloud2.tumblr.com/)


	7. Chapter 7

They moved into the X Factor House down on Hyver Hill the next day, and it felt a little like returning to a favourite holiday home. The crew had set everything up perfectly and there were loads of snacks and drinks waiting for them on the main dining room table. Sunlight was shining through the large front windows, and the view of the hills outside was absolutely spectacular.

‘Vas happening, X Factor house,’ Zayn cheered, as all the contestants made their way through into the reception hall.

Louis darted from Harry’s side, seizing Zayn’s shoulders and shaking him. ‘We have to see everything. It’s all so new and amazing!’

‘I can hardly believe my eyes!’ Zayn grabbed him back and the two of them went hollering into the next room.

‘Oh, Jesus. They’re not going to be like that the whole time, are they?’ Mary said as they put down their bags.

Rebecca looked unsure. ‘I think they’re just a little excited.’

Louis and Zayn yells could be heard as they ran all through the house, before they burst through dining room door, and came leaping back into the front room, barrelling into the other boys. Harry laughed as Louis jumped on him, and he stumbled back under the older boy’s weight.

‘A little?’ Mary repeated to Rebecca, who shrugged.

‘The young boys vill be young boys,’ Wagner announced, dropping his luggage.

‘And that guy isn’t creepy at all,’ Sophia in _Belle Amie_ muttered to Esther, who giggled.

Louis tugged hard on Harry’s shirt, and he nearly overbalanced as he returned his attention to the older boy.

‘Come on, come on!’ Louis pulled him towards the stairs.

‘I am, I am,’ Harry said.

Louis dragged him all the way up the stairs, leaving everyone else on the lower level exclaiming over the house and wondering where to put their bags. Harry tripped over the top step, falling into Louis and trying to breathe through his laughter. Louis barely paused, lifting Harry right off the ground and hauling him down the corridor towards where they knew their bedroom was.

Harry wriggled unhelpfully. ‘Put me down,’ he yelled to the ceiling, and Louis promptly dropped him to the floorboards.

‘Look!’ Louis pointed at a door with a sign on it. ‘It’s _One Direction’s_ room, oh my God!’

Harry laughed and opened the door as Louis’ hand fell to his back, guiding him through the doorway. The room looked the same as the first time, only the five beds all looked neat and untouched and there weren’t yet any clothes or shoes on the carpet. Harry tried to stop for a moment, but Louis planted his hands on Harry’s waist and pushed—making him stumble into the nearest bed-frame.  

‘Quit manhandling me, you dirty animal,’ Harry said, flicking his hair out of his face and finding the other boy a lot closer than he’d thought..

‘Make me, baby-cakes,’ Louis said.

Harry’s protest was swallowed by Louis’ lips, so he hummed instead, arching up into Louis and letting his taste curl low in his tightening gut. He lost himself in pleasure for a moment before Louis’ words filtered through his mind and Harry bit into Louis, hard enough to make him yelp and jerk away. Harry kept pushing him back until the older boy smacked into the wardrobe.

‘Oh,’ Louis said, his eyes going wide and his mouth going slack in surprise.

Harry clasped down on Louis’ arms, pressing them to the wood, and he pressed forward to lick inside his mouth. Louis made a strained noise and his hips bucked. Harry dug his fingers into the smooth flesh and opened his mouth wider, wanting more and more, and Louis’ shoulders slipped against the wardrobe, his chest heaving up against Harry.

He ran his hands over Louis’ sides, and the older boy made another gasping sound as Harry pushed up the hem of his shirt, and scratched his fingers over the skin there, before he became aware that Louis was tapping hurriedly at Harry’s cheek.

Harry frowned, breaking off. The sound of approaching footsteps and Niall’s laugh filtered in through his fogged mind. Louis’ pushed his shoulders and he stepped back enough to let Louis right himself off the wardrobe, the other boy still breathing hard with his jumper skewed off one shoulder.

Niall and Zayn came into the room with their bags, still laughing over something, and Harry felt half-bewildered at their interruption. Louis slipped away from Harry’s side, slinging his arms around both of the other boys’ shoulders, and startling them.

‘Whoa, didn’t realise you were in here already,’ Zayn said.

‘You lads left your bags by the door,’ Niall said. ‘I t’ink Liam said he’d get them.’

Louis nodded quickly, breathing too fast. ‘I’ll—go help, shall I?’ He disappeared out the door, leaving Harry to wallow with the swirl of emotions in his stomach.

‘You alright, mate?’ Niall said cheerfully, throwing his bag on his bed.

Harry shot him a dark look, but Niall didn’t see, having already turned around to talk to Zayn. Harry closed his eyes momentarily. He swallowed as he adjusted his jeans, and slunk out of the room after Louis.

**1D**

‘Good morning, boys. How are we feeling?’ Simon asked the next day as he entered the small studio room.

‘Really good thanks,’ Liam said, putting on his responsible voice.

‘Behaving ourselves, are we?’

Zayn exchanged a grin with Louis. ‘Uh, sure?’

‘I don’t believe that for a second,’ the man said, and Harry tried to hide his smirk.

They had been left by themselves in the studio for the last hour, waiting for Simon to finish talking with each of the groups separately. They had already raided the soda machine down the hall and Harry had just been starting to go a little crazy from how Louis kept catching his eye. While they hadn’t yet said anything to the other boys, it seemed like part of them could sense it. The atmosphere in the room was charged high with all of them were being louder and sillier than usual, enough that Simon probably could have heard them in the next room.

‘Well, it’s time to choose your song, boys, so just settle down a bit.’

‘Focus, boys!’ Louis barked in a fair imitation of Paul, and Zayn dropped his head, shoulders shaking.

‘Yes, exactly,’ Simon said, pulling out a chair opposite them and placing a folder of sheets on the table. ‘Right. I’ve got a couple of suggestions and different songs to try out. We can have a listen to them and talk them over, just to find out what works and what doesn’t.’

‘Erm, actually,’ Harry said. ‘We kind of already chose something, if it’s okay with you?’

Simon raised an eyebrow. ‘What were you thinking of?’

Harry told him.

Simon frowned. ‘That’s rather a big song, boys. Look, you have to keep in mind that this is your first time singing in front of a large audience.’

Niall coughed, ducking his head and Louis patted him on the back.

‘Alright there, Nialler?’

‘Somet’ing in my throat,’ he wheezed.

Zayn leant forward on the table. ‘We’re not ones to shy away from a song, just because it might be hard.’

Simon was still frowning. ‘Boys, the harsh reality of it is that people are going to make up their minds about _One Direction_ just from watching this first show, so we have to make sure their opinions are good ones. If you chose a song that’s too big for you right at the start, you’ll lose a lot of potential voters, which at the end of the day is what matters most.’

Harry bit his lip. ‘The thing is… we feel like we need to do a big song. We want to prove that we got here not through just how we look, but because we can sing.’

‘I absolutely promise you, Simon, we can sing this,’ Liam said.

Simon sighed. ‘If you genuinely believe that, we can try it in the studio and see how it works, but I want you to know that you’re taking a risk.’

**1D**

The crew members hustled them into place as Nicolo left the stage to the cheers of the crowd. It was dark behind the huge X Factor doors, and Harry felt all jittery. It had been so long since they’d preformed in front of an actual audience like this, and his head was a tumble of nervous thoughts. He startled when Louis’ knuckles brushed the back of his hand. He looked at the older boy, and Louis quirked his lips, making Harry’s own pull into a smile.

The sound of their week’s introduction video started. ‘ _Getting through to the live shows was one of the biggest moments in our lives,_ ’ Harry heard his own voice say during the interview they’d given from the house yesterday.

‘ _The song we chose was one we all wanted to perform,_ ’ Zayn said. ‘ _There wasn’t any problems, we just got into it really quickly._ ’

‘ _We already knew the lyrics which helped our vocal coach, Savan, a bit,_ ’ Louis said.

Savan’s voice came through from when they were in the studio. ‘ _You mean, you boys have already worked out who’s singing which parts?_ ’

There was the briefest sound of them all singing, before the shot cut away to Savan laughing.

‘ _I can’t believe it, they’ve assembled it all themselves._ ’ Savan had said that to the crew after they’d sung, shaking his head.

‘ _It was quite fun really_ ,’ Liam said. ‘ _We had to put a lot of work in which we all enjoyed._ ’

‘ _At first, I was reluctant to let the boys sing this song_ ,’ Simon said. ‘ _Normally, it would be one that a lot of bands would have trouble with first off, but strangely it worked amazingly well._ ’

‘ _These guys really need to deliver this song._ ’ Cheryl’s voice came over.‘ _I honestly don’t know what Simon was thinking letting them choose a song so big, it’s a lot of pressure._ ’

The crowd broke into cheers, and then the doors were opening.

**1D**

‘Let’s dance in style, let’s dance for a while. Heaven can wait, we’re only watching the stars…’ Liam sang, as they moved into the spotlight

The glossy stage was spread out in front of them and Harry could barely see the faces of the audience through the lights, but the panel with the four judges stood out clearly. Harry pushed down the ball of nerves in his chest, and stepped forward.

‘Let us die young, or let us live forever! We don’t have the power, but we never say never! Sitting in a sandpit, life is a short trip, and music’s for the sad man…’ Harry smiled as he sang, catching sight of a camera lens in the audience and he winked at it.

 The crowd’s cheers tripled in volume, as the beat kicked up and all five of them descended down the stairs.

‘ _Forever young! I wanna be, forever young!’_

Harry stretched out his hand to the audience, closing his eyes as the spotlight shifted over his skin and he threw back his head. ‘ _Do you really want to live forever! Forever… forever young._ ’ He whisked the microphone away from his lips and looked to Niall in the centre.

Niall seemed to be shining in the light, his eyes incredibly blue as his voice soared. ‘Some are like water! Some are like the heat. Some are a melody, and some are a beat…’

Harry flicked his hair out of his eyes, and Louis met his eyes from Niall’s other side. A rush of warmth twisted in his stomach.

He stepped forward to sing, drawing that feeling into the words. ‘It’s hard to get old… without a cause! I don’t want to perish, like a broken horse! Youth is like diamonds in the sun…’ The words resonated through the auditorium; louder than Harry had ever sang in rehearsals.

They went into the chorus again, and Harry realised just how loud the crowd was cheering. He looked over to the judges’ panel, and saw them all watching, with growing astonishment.

‘ _Do you really want to live forever... forever… or never!_ ’

He pulled back and jumped, high on the energy, and punched forward with the beat. ‘ _Forever young! I wanna be, forever young!_ ’

Louis and Liam came together, slinging arms around each other’s backs and beaming out at the audience as they sang in duet; Louis’ high and clear voice perfectly harmonising with Liam’s baritone. ‘So many adventures couldn’t happen today! So many songs, we forgot to play. So many dreams, swinging out of the blue, we’ll let them come true...’

Harry gazed out the audience as he sang his deep solo chorus. Halfway through, Zayn reached over and poked him in the cheek, and a wide grin broke out on Harry’s face as he sang without missing a beat. ‘Forever young! I wanna be, forever young...’

The drums rolled and they all spread out again. Louis and Liam rushing out to the edge of the stage and getting the audience to join in and clap as Harry, Niall and Zayn took the centre and belted out the lyrics, rocking their shoulders into the music.

‘ _Do you really wanna live forever!_ ’

‘Forever…’ Zayn echoed.

‘ _Forever young!_ ’ they finished, Harry turned and caught Zayn in a tight hug as the audience screamed.

 ‘Wow! Boys, that was unbelievable!’ Louis Walsh shouted over the crowd. ‘I admit I was worried when I hear you were doing this song, but you look and sound amazing. I think you boys are the next big boy-band!’

‘Guys, the way you gel together is just wonderful,’ Dannii Minogue said, eyes wide. ‘If someone had said to me now that you boys hadn’t known each other two months ago, I wouldn’t have believed them for a second. You made that song your own, and you sang it amazingly.’

‘I seriously can’t believe it. I mean, did _you_ style them?’ Cheryl hand was covering her lips as she looked from Simon and back to the boys.

Simon gave a small knowing smile. ‘No, they did that all themselves.’

‘They look so good though, it’s absolutely devastating. I don’t know how there aren’t girls fainting in the audience. Honestly, I can’t stand to look at them, they’re just so—’

‘Okay, Cheryl.’ Simon patted her on the shoulder and smiling.

‘But, look at them, they are just—’

‘Calm down,’ Simon said, and the audience laughed. ‘Boys, that was so impressive I hardly even know what to say. Since you put yourselves together at the boot-camp, you’ve been wowing us at every turn. I think you are one of the most exciting things to ever come out of this show. You are absolutely flying ahead of the other contestants, so well done, boys.’

**1D**

All five of them burst through the doors into the corridors backstage. Zayn caught a beaming Liam in a tight hug, kissing his hair and making Liam laugh, before reaching out and hooking an arm around Niall’s neck and pulling him in to do the same.

‘That was brilliant,’ Zayn said into Niall’s hair.

Liam hugged them both. ‘It was really, really amazing.’

‘It’ll ne’er get old, not in a million years,’ Niall declared.

Louis had Harry clasped tight under his arm, and he kept Harry in place as he spun about. ‘Did you see Simon’s face? Oh my God, that was _incredible_.’

Harry could feel the Louis buzzing, his words vibrating through his chest. The older boy kept rubbing his hand over Harry’s shoulder in an extremely distracting fashion. Louis laughed at something Zayn said, and Harry stared at the line of his neck and the way his throat moved as he spoke. Louis grinned down at Harry, and his eyes seemed to sparkle. Harry watched the older boy’s lips move as he said something, but he was too caught up with the soaring in his chest to listen, so the words blurred into a jumbled noise.

He couldn’t stop smiling for a second.

**1D**

That night, once the after-show party had died down and everyone had retreated to their rooms, Harry still couldn’t relax. Niall had already fallen asleep, Zayn was lying on his bed pressing buttons on his phone, and Liam had slipped downstairs for a glass of water. Harry was trying to avoid looking over at Louis, because judging by the mood he was in, he would probably do something impulsive and stupid if he did.

Harry dropped his own phone he’d been playing games on and rolled off the bed. He hadn’t yet bothered to change out of his jeans and plain shirt he’d thrown on for their late dinner, and he wondered if he should shower before bed to save fighting over bathroom time in the morning.

Harry accidently looked over at Louis’ bed, and found the other boy’s eyes glinting at him. Yeah, a shower could definitely help.

He padded out of the bedroom and made his way quickly to the bathroom down the hall that was thankfully empty. He went over to the mirror and looked at himself for a moment, wondering if he could see any change in himself physically. He certainly didn’t feel the same, but the only difference he could see from normal was that his eyes looked darker than usual.

The door creaked open behind Harry, and he watched through the mirror as Louis slipped inside, closing and locking the door behind him. Louis stood by the door, meeting Harry’s gaze through the mirror, and rubbing his hands on the pockets of his trousers.

‘So, this is a bit weird, right?’ Louis asked, the corner of his mouth turning up.

Harry turned around to face him properly. ‘We could stop?’ he suggested eventually.

‘You really think we could?’ Louis asked, before wrinkling his nose. ‘Christ. Forget I ever said that.’

‘Said what?’ Harry smirked, stepping towards the other boy.

Louis’ eyes flicked away from Harry’s. ‘Also, you’re not allowed to speak to me with that look on your face.’

‘This isn’t a look. It’s just my face.’

‘Whatever it is, you can’t do it. I forbid you.’

‘You forbid me?’

Louis nodded. ‘Yes. It’s illegal. From now on, you shall have to wear a mask.’

‘Kinky.’

‘And one of those ball-gag things too.’

Harry leaned closer. ‘Anything else I can do right now?’

Louis’ gaze slid down to Harry’s lips. ‘I can think of a few things, yeah.’

‘Like what?’

‘Um, like—’

‘Hesitation,’ Harry said.

‘Oh, shut up, Hazza,’ Louis huffed, and he pushed his mouth into Harry’s lips.

His hands gripped his waist, and Harry made a pleased sound and he took hold of Louis’ shoulders, kissing hard and feeling that curl in his stomach. Louis pushed him until his back hit the bathroom counter. His hands rubbed Harry’s hips, moving in circles around to Harry’s arse and back again, unknowingly tightening the denim of Harry’s jeans every time he did it, and driving Harry mental.

He gasped into Louis’ mouth when the older boy gripped the back of his thighs and lifted him up onto the counter, knocking half the bottles and accessories off in the process, sending them clattering down to the tiled floor. Harry curved in on himself, and Louis tilted his head up, opening and meeting Harry’s tongue shamelessly, in what had to be one of the filthiest kisses ever.

Louis’ fingers tugged at Harry’s hips, and Harry widened his legs without thinking, letting Louis press up close between his thighs. He gripped Louis’ jaw in both hands, thrusting his tongue deep inside and he groaned when Louis not only took it, but sucked in on his tongue and pressed closer for more.

‘Ah, fuck,’ Louis gasped, pulling off just when Harry was beginning to see stars from the lack of air. ‘I need—I wanna—you’ll let me, won’t you?’ He tugged at the button on Harry’s jeans.

‘Yeah, yeah,’ Harry muttered, hardly even thinking about what he was agreeing to.

Louis opened Harry’s jeans, pulling the material down with his boxers. ‘Fuck,’ Louis said again, digging his fingers into Harry’s thighs before lowering his head and nuzzling the dip of Harry’s waist before his crotch.

Harry choked and his hands flew out to grip the sink and the side of the counter, eyes going wide as he looked at the back of Louis’ head, feeling his hair tickling his belly and his breath tease along his cock, and his lips barely touching the sensitive skin.

Louis’ biceps were straining and his shoulders looked too wide bending over Harry’s lap—but then his fingers pressed almost painfully into Harry’s flesh and he didn’t move any further. Harry exhaled harshly, fighting to get control, and place a hand on Louis’ shoulder-blades. He could feel the slight tremble that Louis was trying to hide.

‘Hey, s’okay,’ he said.

In the next instant Harry was the one to tense up completely, as Louis’ hand closed around his dick, and a moment later tight, wet heat slid over him. Harry’s head fell back and thudded into the mirror, and his hand tightened on Louis’ shoulder as the older boy opened around him, his wicked tongue licking at the underside of his cock.

Louis paused again and Harry looked down to see a frown of concentration cross the older boy’s face. He gasped and his hands smacked into the mirror, trying to find something to hold onto as Louis sunk down completely. His lips stretched until his nose was right up against his dark curls, and Harry nudged the back of his throat, a litany of curses going through his mind.

Louis’ throat tightened and he pulled off, coughing. ‘That’s harder than it looks. How do girls do it?’

‘Uh,’ Harry managed.

Louis wasn’t paying attention though, too focused on taking Harry down again. Harry shuddered, the muscles quivering in his stomach as he struggled to hold still and not thrust forward into the slick warmth fluttering around him. Louis pressed his mouth right into Harry’s crotch, and his fingernails scraped the inside of his thighs, pinching and spreading the skin unconsciously as he breathed through his nose and pushed his mouth down again. Louis dragged back to lick his tongue up over Harry’s slit and he twisted his head as he bobbed down again, pushing Harry right to the back of his throat, before pulling back and hollowing his cheeks as he sucked like he was trying to inhale Harry.

Harry pressed his hand flat against the mirror and gasped for air, his mind flashing with white, because _fuck_ was Louis a fast learner at this. His bare toes curled against the counter as he tried to spread his legs as wide as his jeans would let him. Louis kept up that overwhelming rhythm, stripping Harry of all sense and control, and his hips jerked forward, pressing into Louis’ throat as the older boy took him down again. Louis choked around him, lips tightening and teeth catching on his cock, and Harry was gone.

‘ _Lou_ ,’ he tried to warn, but his voice came out in such a high whine as every muscle in his body went tense. Louis pulled his mouth back as Harry’s hips bucked, and his lips and cheek were streaked with Harry’s release.

Louis stared up at Harry, his blue eyes scattered with green and grey like sea-glass, as white come dripped down his tanned cheek.

‘The fuck, Harry?’ His voice was agonisingly hoarse. ‘You ever heard of warning someone?’

‘Tried,’ Harry exhaled, body going loose. ‘Sorry.’

Louis huffed and grabbed Harry’s shirt, yanking the material forward to wipe his face.

‘Oi,’ Harry protested, weakly slapping at Louis’ arm.

Louis let him go, and stood up, avoiding Harry’s eyes. His face was flushed, and his lips looked used and wet and Harry couldn’t stop staring.

‘Okay, that was fun,’ Louis said brightly, voice still croaking. ‘What’s a quick blowjob between pals, eh? Practically business-like.’

‘What?’ Harry said, mind fuzzy.

‘Never-mind. Let’s get you up, Curly.’ Strong hands hauled Harry off the counter and he stumbled when his jellied legs touched the floor.

‘Wait,’ Harry said.

Louis tugged at Harry’s jeans, buttoning them up quickly, and thumping him on the back. ‘Come on, out you go. For God’s sake, Hazza, at least try not to look so fucked-out when you go back to the room.’

‘Huh?’ Harry nearly tripped on the doorway step as Louis pushed him out of the bathroom. ‘Wait. Aren’t you—? Don’t you want me to—’

The white door shut on his face. He stared, half-expecting Louis to open it again, even as he heard the lock click. 

He hesitated, and then knocked.

‘Kinda busy here,’ Louis called through the wood.

‘Open the door, Louis.’

‘Not happening.’ The other boy was out of breath.

Harry shuffled his feet, and looked over his shoulder down the dark hallway. ‘Um.’

‘Just—go to bed, already.’

Harry nodded slowly. ‘Okay. But, Louis?’

‘What?’ Louis sounded desperate.

‘I just wanted to say…’ Harry leant close to the door, lowering his voice further. ‘I think your mouth is fantastic, and I wouldn’t mind returning the favour.’

Louis swore from inside. Harry patted the door before moving off back to the bedroom. Nearly fifteen minutes later, Louis crept back in as well and Harry watched from his top bunk as the older boy crawled into bed, wondering if he should say something or if Louis would say something. In the end neither of them did, and Harry fell asleep thinking of Louis’ lips.

 

 

[me](http://braincloud2.tumblr.com/)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! You guys are wonderful, big love to you XX


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Harry’s on tour and he feels on top of the world—until he wakes up one morning to find himself at the first day of the X Factor boot-camp, just sixteen years old again, and absolutely terrified that he’s just lost the last two years of his life.

The rush before the results show was always the same. Everyone was stressing over how the group performance was going to work, and where everyone was supposed to go, and the crew were dashing back and forth with hardly any time to answer questions. Only the boys didn’t pepper the assistants with questions, something which they seemed relieved about, and the five of them were mostly left alone in the auditorium.

Harry had stretched out in one of the audience chairs next to Niall, occasionally dipping his hand into the Irish boy’s large packet of crisps. Liam was huddled in his purple hoodie and looked enthralled by twitter, and Louis had draped himself over Zayn a couple of rows ahead of the other three. Harry eyed Louis surreptitiously as the older boy ducked his head into Zayn’s shoulder and giggled at something he’d said. The older boy hadn’t exactly been avoiding Harry—kind of hard to do when they all lived in the same room—but Louis certainly hadn’t been showering him in attention, and it made him feel a little knotted and weird.

‘Harry stop,’ Niall groaned, catching Harry’s hand in his crisps. ‘It’s not like you’re hungry.’

‘How do you know?’ Harry grumbled.

Niall gave him an unimpressed look. ‘Cause I do. What’s wrong anyway? Are you in one o’ your snits?’

Harry didn’t think that deserved an answer.

Niall snorted. ‘Take ‘em, you big baby.’ He dropped the packet in Harry’s lap, stretching his arm along the top of Harry’s seat. ‘You’re never happy unless you have exactly what you want, are you?’

‘Not true,’ Harry said, crunching down on the chips.

Niall leaned in close to Harry’s ear. ‘Give you this, give you that. Blow a kiss, take it back.’

‘Shut up.’ Harry laughed, shoving the crisps back at him. ‘Tosser.’

Liam suddenly made a strange noise, loud enough that even Louis and Zayn turned around to look at him.

Liam was staring at his phone, but he looked up as they fell silent. ‘So, this is a bit different, but what if I told you, we’ve become an over-night sensation?’

‘What? Let me see.’ Harry pounced on Liam’s phone and scrolled up the page, eyes widening as article after article went by declaring _One Direction’s_ popularity boomingacross the UK. He found a video at the top of the page of their performance the night before.

‘Click it,’ Louis said over Harry’s shoulder, all of them now crowding around the phone.

He clicked it and sucked in a breath. ‘…it already has a ton of views.’

‘Holy crap,’ Liam said, as the video began playing. ‘How is this happening? They mentioned us on the news for pity’s sake.’

‘Dunno,’ Louis said, sliding his fringe out his eyes. ‘Guess they just really like us.’

‘That’s crazy though,’ Liam said. ‘We’ve only preformed once.’

‘More like three times,’ Zayn said. ‘Counting the ones at boot-camp and the judges houses, yeah? Even though we missed watching that one because there’s no telly allowed in the X Factor house.’

Harry had forgotten about that. ‘I wonder how that went down?’

Niall shrugged, pulling back. ‘Well, whate’er. At least it looks like we’re okay for tonight, lads.’

Liam gave an incredulous laugh. ‘Yeah, at least there’s that.’

**1D**

Harry finally caught Louis in the dressing room when they were changing into what Wardrobe had supplied for the all-contestant performance that night. He leant on the older boy’s back and Louis raised a questioning brow as he buttoned up his shirt.

‘Are you always gonna avoid me after?’ Harry asked.

Louis’ face went blank. ‘I’m not avoiding you.’

‘You are, though,’ Harry said quietly, watching the other boy’s face carefully.

Louis reached up and enclosed Harry’s hand, stroking it firmly. ‘No, I’m not,’ he said, a smile pulling at his lips. ‘Just having trouble not pressing you against the nearest surface is all.’

He frowned, and Louis slapped his cheek.

‘Cheer up, buttercup,’ he said, detaching himself.

Harry watched him saunter down the isle. ‘Want some milk with that shake?’

Louis laughed. ‘You wish, Curly.’

He swayed his hips even more and Harry watched, a low heat coiling inside him.

**1D**

Niall’s head knocked into Harry’s foot as he and Louis tumbled about the floor while Harry texted his Mum from the couch. They had already driven off all the other contestants from the bean-bag room by chucking the cushions at each other and trying to flatten the other. Liam had joined in at first, before his phone rang and he moved off to a quieter room to answer, and Zayn had just gone upstairs to change into some more comfortable clothes. 

Harry’s attention was drawn away from his phone when Niall cackled loudly. Louis pushed the blonde boy down flat on his back straddled his chest, trying to pin his arms down as well. Niall kept laughing, his face turning red from the lack of air. Louis kept Niall in place with his thighs, fending off the swipes for his face and laughing, completely oblivious to how obscenely taut his colourful trousers were from behind. Harry’s phone slipped forgotten from his fingers to his stomach, and suddenly Niall’s laugh seemed too loud and the room was too bright.

Harry slithered off the couch and left the room, unnoticed by the other two. He moved through the noisy kitchen, where most of the other contestants had congregated, and down the hall to their bedroom with only Zayn inside, quietly talking on the phone.

‘Yeah,’ Zayn said into the phone from where he was sitting on Liam’s single bed in the corner. He held his arm out and Harry took the offer, crawling up on the bed and settling under his arm. ‘Yeah, Mum. Alright. I gotta go. Okay. Okay, bye.’

As Zayn hung up, Harry said, ‘Another deep conversation with your Mum?’

‘I love my Mum.’ Zayn squeezed Harry’s shoulders. ‘So, what’s up with you then?’

‘What do you mean?’

Zayn scoffed. ‘You’ve been weird all day, and you looked two seconds away from attacking something when you came in here.’

‘I haven’t.’ Harry sunk down into Zayn’s side. ‘S’hard to explain.’

Zayn continued to look at Harry, his concern deepening as he waited in silence.

Harry fiddled with the hem of Zayn’s shirt. ‘Okay, so basically, Louis and I have been…’

‘You two aren’t fighting, are you?’ Zayn frowned.

‘Nah, it’s kinda the opposite, actually.’ Harry scratched his neck. ‘Like, we’ve sort of been snogging.’

Harry felt surprise move through Zayn’s body. He glanced up at Zayn’s stunned expression and had to look away.

‘You want to run that by me again?’ Zayn asked.

Harry’s shoulders hunched up. ‘Uh, snogging?’

‘As in a joke?’

‘No.’ Harry squinted. ‘As in with _intent_.’

Zayn stared at him. ‘What the fuck? That is massive deal.’

‘Mm, no. I think the blowjob is more of a big deal.’

‘A blowjo—? Fuck, Harry, are you for real?’ Zayn’s eyes looked far too huge to be healthy.

‘It felt pretty real.’

Zayn shook his head, and his arm felt tense at the back of Harry’s neck. ‘I just—are you together now or…?’

Harry heart thumped harder. ‘Uh, I dunno.’

‘Harry.’ Zayn groaned.

‘It’s not exactly like that.’ Harry frowned. ‘I guess it’s more for fun?’

‘Fun,’ Zayn repeated flatly. ‘You started snogging Louis for fun.’

‘Yeah.’ Harry sat up a bit, the idea building momentum in his mind. ‘Yeah, it’s just like that. It’s like, well you know you and me?’

‘Mate, do you even listen to yourself sometimes?’

Harry ignored him. ‘I mean, we’re so close that we can do a lot of stuff and our friendship will still be completely fine.’ He pushed up from Zayn’s arm and swivelled over his lap. His legs spanned Zayn easily as the other boy’s hands came up to grip his hips.

Zayn stared with something like panic beginning to edge onto his face. ‘What are you doing?’

‘Relax,’ Harry said, sliding his hands over Zayn’s shoulders as he bent down. ‘It’s not a big deal. It’s just…’

He nudged his lips into Zayn’s and his eyelids lowered, hands clenching into Harry’s waist, almost encircling it, and it made Harry’s blood pump harder. Harry pressed harder into Zayn, and after a moment, Zayn pushed back, biting at Harry and taking control. Harry shifted his hips slightly to keep balance and he almost moaned aloud from how good it felt.

Zayn kissed differently to Louis, more firmly and smoother, and Harry could smell his aftershave, which messed with his senses and he felt like he was melting into Zayn’s mouth. Zayn breathed through his nose as he kissed harder, and every shift and clench of his hands up Harry’s back sent another wave of heat through him, enough that he was started to get light-headed from the overload of sensations. Harry pulled back with a gasp, resting his forehead against Zayn’s as they breathed into each other, lips still connected by a glistening line of saliva.

‘Fun,’ Harry panted, closing his eyes.

There was a surprised squeak behind Harry, and he rolled his forehead on Zayn’s to look back at the door. Liam was standing there, his mouth open, and his brown eyes huge with confusion.

‘Liam,’ Zayn said, going completely still beneath Harry.

Harry sighed into Zayn’s lips and slid back off the bed. The other two stayed right where they were; Zayn with his shirt twisted on his stomach and trousers bugling indecently, and Liam who could have been wax model if not for the colour pulsing in his cheeks.

Harry moved to the door, slapping Liam on the chest as he went by. ‘Don’t worry. Zayn’ll explain everything,’ he told him, and left them to it.

**1D**

‘This is _One Direction_ and this is our video diary,’ Harry said, leaning forward onto his knees as he spoke to the camera.

Emma and Joel from the film crew at the house were crouched at the bottom of the stairs, with most of the other contestants having already disappeared into their rooms after the long day in the studio. Emma wanted them to tell the online show what it had been like performing their first week, and how the were doing the second week. Liam was answering her questions down the front next to Louis, and Harry was wedged in next to Niall on the next step.

Zayn put his hand on Harry’s shoulder from behind him, and Harry twisted around to share a smile with him. It hadn’t been the least bit awkward between the two of them since the day before. Liam, however, had gone pink every time Harry had touched him throughout the day—something which Harry tested over and over again, until Zayn made him stop for the sake of Liam’s blood pressure.

‘Okay, boys,’ Emma was saying at the bottom of the stairs. ‘So if you could just read these questions off this card and then everyone could answer, that would be really great.’

Louis went first, addressing the Joel with the camera. ‘Alright. So last week we asked for some questions, and we’ve got one here from Eloise—lovely name—who wants to know what roles people play in the band. Right, well, Liam pretends to be sensible but he’s really just immature,’ Louis said, pointing. ‘Harry, is a cheeky flirt and utterly shameless about it. Zayn is my partner in crime, and Niall is the most carefree, and loveliest lad you’ve ever met.’

Zayn cut in. ‘Aw, and Louis is the sweet one.’

‘The adorable one,’ Harry added, grinning.

‘He’s Mr. Sensitive,’ Liam said, and Niall laughed into Harry’s shoulder.

 Louis scowled at them petulantly. ‘I disown all of you.’

‘Alright, thanks,’ Emma giggled. ‘Liam, if you could read the next card.’

Liam leant forward. ‘Okay. Hey, Justine. You had a question that was… oh, no.’

‘What?’ Harry asked, trying to see.

Liam swallowed. ‘Uh, what do _One Direction_ look for in a girl?’

All of them fell quiet and looked at Louis.

‘Thank you for your great question, Justine,’ Louis said, smile turning wicked.

‘Don’t do it, Louis,’ Zayn said.

‘Because it just so happens, that I have an affinity for girls who like ca—’

They all yelled their heads off, and lunged for him. Harry slapped at Louis’ mouth trying to cover it as Niall yanked on Louis shoulders, Liam and Zayn latching onto his arms.

‘I have to, lads!’ Louis struggled to get free. ‘It’s part of my identity—part of who I am in this world!’

‘You fool, you’ll doom us all.’ Harry scrabbled for Louis’ face, and Louis wrenched his head away,

‘People have a right to know that I like—’

Niall grabbed around Louis’ throat and tried to throttle him, but Louis kept going.

‘—girls who like carrots!’

Liam’s head dropped into his hands and Niall moaned like he was dying. Zayn fell on Harry, pressing their cheeks together, and making sobbing noises as Harry clutched back at him.

Louis smiled at the camera. ‘Right. Next question?’

Emma and Joel just stared at them.

**1D**

The next day they went out to see the fans standing outside, and were met with ear-splitting screams. They signed as many autographs and took as many pictures as they could in their half-hour break and Harry loved every second of it. He pulled Niall into a hug as they stumbled back inside, and Niall returned it twice as hard.

Later that night, after dinner, Harry curled up on the couch next to Zayn and watched as Liam versed Louis on the PlayStation 3. Louis moaned that the 2012 version of the game was so much better than FIFA 10, and Liam hit him, hissing about the cameras still wandering about the house.

Zayn stroked the underside of Harry’s arm, where his tattoos used to be. Harry tilted his head to look at Zayn, and he smiled back wordlessly. Harry shifted and took hold of the other boy’s forearm. He turned it over to trail his fingers over where the life-like microphone had been; now only a smooth expanse of skin.

Zayn caught Harry’s hand and he looked up, meeting Zayn’s soft gaze. 

‘Yes,’ Liam cheered. ‘I score again, Tommo.’

Harry turned around just as the older boy threw his controller at a dozing Niall, and got to his feet.

‘S’it my turn?’ Niall asked drowsily, sliding down next to Liam.

Louis stalked towards their couch, grabbing Harry’s shirt collar, and yanking him away from Zayn. Harry yelped as he fell, managing to catch himself before he hit the carpet, but Louis didn’t pause.

Harry stumbled after him as he pulled him out of the room, and down the hallway, into the bathroom. He shoved Harry down on the edge of the two-person bathtub, and locked the door.

Flashes of the last time they were in this bathroom invaded Harry’s mind, and he sat quiet trying to will himself into calming down. Louis paced away from the door, biting his thumb as he looked everywhere but Harry.

‘Are you okay?’ Harry asked after a long moment.

‘Well, that’s the thing, isn’t it? I don’t know.’ Louis sounded strained, and he stopped in front of him. ‘What are we doing here, Harry?’

‘You’re the one who pulled me in here.’

Louis scowled at him.

A flush of affection for his friend went through Harry. ‘You’re not very good with talking about this.’

Louis took hold of Harry’s jaw. ‘You know what I mean, you prat.’

‘Yeah,’ Harry could feel his throat vibrate against Louis’ hand when he spoke. ‘I was thinking about it the other day, like about why now, and talking to Zayn made me realise something.’

‘Zayn,’ Louis repeated. ‘You talked to Zayn about this?’

‘Yeah, sorry.’

Louis’ voice climbed. ‘What did you tell him?’

‘I told him we’re doing it because it’s fun.’ Harry slid to his feet, stepping close to the older boy. ‘That’s true, right? You like kissing with me, don’t you?’

Louis’ throat worked, eyes flicking over Harry’s face. ‘Definitely.’

‘Why worry about it then? Why not just enjoy it and see what happens?’

‘But…’

‘Yeah?’ Harry touched the older boy’s side.

‘Things don’t work like that. You can’t hope everything’ll be okay, just because you’re in the moment and you feel like it.’

‘Says you,’ Harry said, smirking as he leant closer.

‘Fucking—will you quit being sexy for a moment? I can’t think.’

‘That was kind of my intention.’ Harry slid his hand over the other boy’s shirt to the waistband of his trousers.

Harry pushed Louis until is back bumped against the wall, keeping their lips close the entire time. He pulled at the sweats and slipped his fingers inside, and Louis’ breath hitched as he closed his eyes. Harry felt him hardening under his touch, which was sort of weird to feel happening to someone else. He thumbed at the head that nudged up against his hand and Louis shuddered, lips pressing together and eyelashes fanned across the top of his cheeks.

Harry shifted and took Louis fully into his hand, pulling up gently, feeling the weight of him as the smooth skin slipped through his fingers. A small groan escaped Louis, prompting Harry to curl his fingers down and pull up again, harder this time.

He twisted his grip, holding Louis tighter for a moment and caressing the soft skin in circles, entranced by the way Louis’ mouth opened on a silent whine. He moved his other hand to Louis’ neck to feel the muscles clench from the sounds Louis was trying to stop from escaping, and he pulled again, and again. Louis clutched at Harry’s shoulder, catching his lips and fiercely kissing him. Harry pressed back, meeting every lick and bite just as strong, while keeping his strokes slow and drawing every tiny noise he could from Louis.

Harry pulled his head back and dipped his hand lower into the other boy’s boxers, running his fingers over Louis’ balls and feeling how tight they were getting. Louis whimpered, his eyes opening again and a tear escaped down his cheek. Harry moved to catch it and wipe it away, leaving his thumb on Louis’ cheekbone.

‘Please _,_ ’ Louis whispered. ‘ _Please_.’

Harry couldn’t breathe. He leant forward and kissed Louis hard, bringing his hand back up, encircling him and squeezing, swallowing the other boy’s low cry. Louis’ hips thrust forward, pressing into his hand as Harry pulled faster until the older boy’s head dropped forward, his whole body quaking as warm liquid shot into Harry’s hand.

Louis breathed out brokenly, hand still clutching tightly at Harry’s shirt, and Harry held onto him, trying to keep control. Finally, Louis lifted his head and slumped back against the wall, and Harry pulled his hand out to look down at the sticky white on his fingers.

‘How much do you want me to lick this right now?’ he asked.

Louis groaned. ‘Fucking do it.’

So Harry did.

**1D**

‘All right boys, well done. Take a break,’ Brian called to them on stage.

Harry lowered his microphone and smiled at Liam next to him. They were rehearsing their new song this week by Kelly Clarkson, and having an absolute blast doing it. Brian was working with them this week on their stage presence and movements, and Harry had heard the man comment to Savan how easily they were following instructions and working with each other, and Savan had laughed saying, _I know, right?_

‘My goodness, I think the poor boy is ill!’ Louis jumped on Harry from behind, yelling across the auditorium, ‘Someone call the doctor!’

‘What’s going on?’ A camera crew that was filming them rehearse came up. ‘Is someone not feeling well?’

‘It’s Harry,’ Louis said. ‘The stress of performing is getting to him, he’s terribly sick.’

‘Yeah, he’s got a temperature.’ Zayn joined in, palming Harry’s forehead.

‘We think its stage-fright,’ Liam said, grinning.

‘I’m fine, you idiots.’ Harry shoved at them, and turned to the camera. ‘I’m fine.’

‘What?’ asked Niall, coming over. ‘Is Harry sick again?’

‘I’m not sick. It was one time!’

The camera man laughed, turning to the soundman. ‘We should have them put this in the intro video.’

‘You’re all against me,’ Harry said.

He escaped out of their arms and hopped off the stage to find his water bottle. Matt and Aiden were sitting in the audience watching their rehearsal, and they called Harry over as he finished drinking.

‘Yeah? How’s it going?’ Harry asked as he came over.

‘Great.’ Aiden lounged in his chair, smiling kind of self-consciously. ‘But I think you guys are better.’

‘Um, thank you?’

Harry looked at Aiden, suddenly feeling a horrible abyss between the friend he knew, and this boy in front of him.

‘No, we mean that in a good way,’ Matt said, leaning forward. ‘We were wondering something though. It’s just, everyone knows you boys put yourself together at boot-camp, but I’ve been performing small gigs for years, and I still don’t have the confidence or presence you boys have on stage. How do you do it? Can you give us older folks a hint?’

Harry’s mind kind of went blank. Matt was an amazing singer—he was the one who won X Factor for God’s sake—but was asking him for advice. He stared, and Matt looked more embarrassed by the second.

Harry floundered. ‘Uh, I guess when you perform to as many people as we—’ _Shit._ ‘Uh, I mean it’s different when you, like, have your best friends on stage. You just get used t-to—’ he stuttered to a stop.

‘You get used to it, did you say?’ Aiden frowned up at him.

‘You know, I should get back. Thanks.’ Harry hurried away, feeling their eyes all the way back, and he silently swore at himself again.

**1D**

Tension in the house always increased the night before the show. Some people like Paije and some of the _F.Y.I._ guys got really loud, while others like Cher and Rebecca got quieter, retreating to their rooms and shutting their minds off from the outside world. Harry usually didn’t get nervous about performing anymore, not until about an hour before they actually went on at least.

‘Guess this means you’re sorry,’ Harry sang under his breath as he checked the iron. ‘You’re standing at my door. Guess this means you take, back, all you said before...’ He smoothed his shirt out on the board, and started ironing out the creases, still humming and moving his hips.

‘Cause we belong… together now, yeah. Forever united… here somehow, yeah. You gotta piece… of me. And honestly… my life—my life, would suck—would suck, without you.’

He rocked backward, whipping his shirt away and switching off the iron, bopping his head to the imaginary beat. He moved down to the kitchen, thinking of maybe getting a glass of juice before bed, when quiet voices in the kitchen stopped him.

‘—I know you said it was just fun, but is this really something that you want to do?’

‘Liam, it’s not worth getting stressed about,’ Zayn answered.

‘I’m not. Okay, I am, but not because… Look, I just want to know. Why Harry?’

‘Well, it’s his irresistible charm, innit? I’m joking, Liam, why is this bothering you?’

‘It was stupid of me, let’s just go back.’

‘You’re not stupid, you’re brilliant.’

‘Let me go.’

‘Liam.’

They both went quiet. Harry stared into the dark for a moment before his curiosity won out, and he leant forward to peer around the corner. Zayn had trapped Liam near the stove, his hands up to Liam’s face as they pressed together in the dark kitchen, the silence broken by their clothes rustling and the slight sound of lips parting for air. Harry watched for a moment more, before pulling back, realising he wasn’t even surprised.  

 

* * *

Hey g'day! Sorry about the long wait guys, I've got everything sorted now.

The story is finished, I'm just moving it up here when I get the time. Working on something new too which is fun.

Please let me know what you think of this, if you like it or not, either here or on my [tumblr](http://louis-cuddle.tumblr.com/). I always appreicate hearing from you guys

Cheers for reading!


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Harry’s on tour and he feels on top of the world—until he wakes up one morning to find himself at the first day of the X Factor boot-camp, just sixteen years old again, and absolutely terrified that he’s just lost the last two years of his life

Harry rocked with the sway of the car as it went over a bump, shoulder knocking into Louis’ next to him. Louis shifted to curl his arm over Harry’s seat, and Harry sunk into his side. He looked up and caught the older boy’s eye, the streetlights outside playing over his face as they smiled at each other. They had performed and survived the second of the live shows, with the crowd screaming so loud it had been hard to hear what the judges said.

Now it was half-way through week three, and they were on their way to their first X Factor signing at the large HMV music store.

The boys had taken up a whole car for themselves, the other contestants filling up the three other shiny black vehicles as they all travelled to the signing. Niall had squeezed in next to Louis by the opposite window, and Zayn and Liam were in the back, both giving the other side-looks that were supposedly discrete, but massively obvious to Harry. 

Louis skimmed his fingers over Harry’s arm, making goose-bumps spring up and drawing Harry’s attention back to him. Harry’s mouth twitched into a smile again, and he raised his eyebrows in a silent question. Louis pressed his thumb into Harry’s cheek, his eyes following the patches of light as they slid over Harry’s clothes, and he said nothing. Harry’s toes curled in his shoes, but he didn’t look away until a blare of noise distracted him from the front seat. The X Factor assistant sitting there, reached for her radio.

‘Jane, we’re having some problems down at the store,’ a man’s voice crackled through the speaker.

‘Jane here,’ the assistant answered. ‘What kind of problems are we talking? I thought everything was smooth for us to come in?’

There was static for a second, everyone in car turning their attention to the conversation.

‘Uh, well, might be a bit bumpier than we thought.’ The man was shouting over noise in the background. ‘No one thought we would need barriers, and now we’re short on the man power we need.’

‘What do you mean? Are you saying—oh, Lord.’

The car turned the corner and a mass of people came into view, spilling out across the street. Now they could hear the screaming through the thick tinted windows of the car, the sound increasing as people saw the cars come around the corner. The crowd of waving hands and banners that pressed forward as the cars rolled to a stop wasn’t anything new to the five boys, but the obvious lack of any kind of barriers or security men trying to hold them back was worrying. Louis’ hand tightened on Harry’s shoulder, before pulling away as hands began to smack into the windows, so that Harry knew exactly how a goldfish felt when people pounded on the glass. 

‘Jesus,’ Niall muttered, shrinking back from the window.

 ‘Sorry, boys,’ Jane said, turning in her seat to look back at them. ‘Looks like we’re throwing you to the sharks with this one, hey? At least it’ll be exciting, it’ll be like you’re proper famous and everything.’

Zayn snorted, saying under his breath. ‘Sure it will.’

Harry twisted around to meet Zayn’s dark look. At least when they had been doing their world tours they had better safety precautions and teams of security to keep the crowds under control.

‘Alright they’re clearing a small path for you, just stick together and move towards the front doors, okay?’ Jane said cheerily.

Louis groaned. ‘This is gonna be fun,’ he said under his breath. ‘Alight, lads. On three, then.’

Harry unclipped his belt and shifted until he was half-standing in the car, Liam and Zayn both doing the same and leaning on the back seat, heads bent from the roof of the car. Louis had one hand on Niall’s shoulder, and Niall himself looked a little pale.

‘One… two… three!’

The door slid open, and screams flooded inside.

**1D**

Later, after the lights and noise had all died down and almost everyone had gone to bed, Harry found Niall watching a late night movie down alone in the dark.

‘Hey,’ Harry said, making Niall look around at him. ‘Fantastic day, huh?’

‘Yeah, buddy.’ Niall rubbed a hand through his hair, blonde tuffs sticking out between his fingers. ‘Haven’t had a day like that for ages. One o’ the girls nearly scratched me eyes out wanting a hug.’

Harry climbed over the arm of the sofa and sat next to him, the cushions bouncing as Harry settled. They were a quiet for a moment, watching the film on the screen, before Harry reached over and hooked a finger through one of Niall’s belt hoops. ‘You okay? You’re kind of quiet.’

Niall shrugged, not taking his eyes from the screen. ‘I dunno really. Nothin’ to worry about.’

Harry tugged oh his belt hoop. ‘Something’s bothering you.’

Niall sighed, leaning back on the sofa and finally turning his eyes to Harry. ‘I don’t really kno’ what it is though, I just feel weird.’

‘How do you mean?’

‘Well, so earlier, when we were all just messing about—‘ Niall paused, ‘—don’t get me wrong, you lads are me best mates in the world, but sometimes I feel weird when we’re just having a laugh like that. Like it’s not enough for me anymore.’

Harry pulled back, something dull twinging in his stomach. ‘You don’t want to mess about with us, are you saying?’

‘No, not like that. I’m not explainin’ well.’ Niall frowned as he jiggled his leg, trying to pick his words. ‘It’s like, I want to get closer, eevn when we’re right next t’ each other, I wanna be closer.’

‘Oh,’ Harry said, relieved. He pushed forward and sidled right up next to the other boy, curling an arm over his torso and a leg over Niall’s. ‘This better?’

Niall laughed a little. ‘Yeah, a bit.’ He hugged Harry tighter, blue eyes going bright with happiness.

His blonde hair looking incredibly fluffy from this angle and Harry reached up to touch it. Niall smiled wider, his hand moving to Harry’s curls above his neck, tickling his skin lightly in return. Harry compressed his lips, struggling to hold in the laugh that wanted to escape at the touch, but then Niall was leaning down, and softly pressing a kiss to Harry’s cheek.

Harry closed his eyes at the affection in the kiss, and he heard Niall laugh again. The Irish boy tangled his fingers through Harry’s curls, twisting them around his fingers until Harry reached up and stopped them, pulling his hand down holding it, rubbing his thumb over Niall’s soft skin. Red and gold explosions on the television threw flashes of light over the couch but they ignored it. Harry lightly pinched the under-skin of Niall’s wrist, and Niall turned his hand away swiftly, sliding it up Harry’s arm.

Niall ducked his head down again, and pressed a number of tickling butterfly kisses down his face, making Harry squirm and laugh. Every time he thought Niall would stop, he found himself attacked again like the other boy couldn’t help himself, and had to go back for more. Finally, Harry squeezed Niall’s arm in a silent plead, and Niall stopped and just rested his head on Harry’s shoulder instead. Harry nuzzled into the boy’s warmth in return. They stayed snuggled together like that until eventually Harry’s eyes drifted shut.  

**1D**

‘Harry,’ a voice whispered.

He opened his eyes and pulled his head off Niall’s shoulder, blinking up at the figure in front of him. The television was still on with the volume turned down, the screen flashing with glaring and bright with the movie menu title in the otherwise dark room, lighting Louis’ features.

‘Hey. Wondered where you two had gotten to,’ Louis whispered.

Harry felt like he drawing words up from a deep well. ‘Sorry. Fell asleep.’

‘I can see that.’ Louis tilted his head, examining them.

Niall still lost from the world, mouth separated, and fair-hair mussed against the couch, while Harry was curled into him, their limbs lost in a tangle of each other in the quiet dark. Harry continued to blink drowsily up at Louis, wondering at his silence and the strange expression on his face.

‘You look like cherubs,’ Louis murmured finally.

Harry frowned, trying to decide if he meant that as a dig or a compliment. ‘…cherubs?’  

The older boy crouched down, sliding his fringe to the side as his eyes shifting over all of them, drinking them in. ‘You just look beautiful together. All pure and untouched, like,’ he trailed off, reaching out a finger to lightly stroke it down Niall’s cheek.

Harry watched Louis look at Niall, his face close enough that Harry could see every change of emotion in his face.

Louis wet his lips. ‘Kinda gorgeous, isn’t he?’

‘Wass’it?’ Niall mumbled, coming awake.

Louis pulled away, sitting back on his haunches, and he spoke at a more normal tone. ‘Nothing, mate. You lads should come up to bed. You’ll get sore sleeping here.’

Niall groaned, detaching himself from Harry and sending his side cold. ‘Too late. Me arm’s already lost all feeling.’ Niall rolled up from the couch, stretching his arms as he moved to the door.

‘You coming, Haz?’ Louis asked, standing up and holding his hand out to Harry.

Harry searched his face for a trace of the emotion from a minute ago, but the lack of light was hiding most of the older boy’s expression. Harry didn’t move, a growing, apprehensive feeling inside him. Louis raised an eyebrow at him after a moment and Harry made himself move, unfurling from the couch, and reaching up and folding his pale fingers around Louis’ hand. Louis grasped him tight and pulled him to his feet. Harry caught himself as he teetered forward, and Louis’ eyes dropped to Harry’s lips as they came within an inch of each other. Louis had stopped breathing, Harry was close enough to feel if the other boy breathed out and there was nothing there. The atmosphere practically crackled between them as Harry kept his eyes fixed to Louis’, suddenly feeling as if they were trembling on the edge of a new giant chasm, questions rising in his throat like a wave that threatened to pull him down.

‘Are you boys coming?’ Niall asked by the door.

Harry dragged his eyes from Louis. ‘Yeah, all right.’ He squeezed Louis’ hand once before letting it slip from his fingers, turning away to follow Niall out the room.

Once back in his bunk bed, sleep came slowly to Harry; the rustles as the other boys slept seeming startling loud. When he did finally fall asleep, he dreamt he was on the beach in Los Angeles, and that the film crew wanted them to keep jumping off the painted rail of the stairs. In the dream, Harry dangled over the sand, looking up at his friends laughing as they lowered him by his wrist—and panic swelled within him as he suddenly didn’t want them to let go. He tried to tell them to hold on, but words weren’t coming out of his mouth properly. Louis and Liam’s smiles were bright in the sun as they leant over the rail, and Niall was laughing against Zayn, and none of them could hear Harry.

‘ _Please_ ,’ he said desperately.

They let go, he fell and hit the sand, rolling away down the slope towards the water line. His face smushed into the colder, wet sand and stayed there, his limbs losing the ability to move and leaving him stuck, inert on the sand. The water rushed forward, and he knew that when the tide came in, he would be completely swallowed. A shadow fell over him from behind and a moment later a hand touched his shoulder. Harry couldn’t turn his head to see who it was, and the frustration at this world writhed inside him.

‘ _Hey_.’ Louis’ voice came from behind him. ‘ _You didn’t think we’d leave you down here by yourself, did you? Look, we’re all here, you just have to turn around_.’

**1D**

The five of them knew the song for this week wasn’t working. It was one Simon had chosen again and they had tried it, but they just weren’t feeling the song, it wasn’t their style. They talked it over again during rehearsal that morning, sitting off to the side of the stage with Niall strumming a few familiar chords on his guitar, striking an idea in Harry that he suggested to the others.

Liam frowned. ‘Maybe. I’m not sure it fits into the theme for this week though. That song is hardly a guilty pleasure.’

‘The title might be considered one, in the right context, yeah?’ Zayn said.

‘Heads up, here comes Uncle Simon,’ Louis said, gesturing. ‘Let’s ask him if we can.’

‘Look, boys, we’re all in agreement, this one just isn’t working,’ Simon said as he came up. ‘Why don’t we try the back-up song you prepared, and see how that goes?’

The boys looked at each other, Niall accidently catching his thumb on the strings of his guitar and sending a twang through their silence.

‘It’s not a bad thing, boys. You’re not doing terribly. It’s just not at the level of your last few performances.’

‘No, we’re not upset,’ Harry said. ‘Basically, we were hoping to change to a different song, except not to the back-up one. We were thinking of, like a _Kings of Leon_ song, but we’re just not sure if it fits into the theme?’

Simon frowned. ‘ _Kings of Leon_? That band has a very distinct sound, Harry. Very different from what you boys have been singing so far. And I’m not sure ‘Sex on Fire’ is the right choice for your voter demographic.’

‘No, I’m sure it isn’t,’ Liam said, and Niall laughed next to him.

Harry caught Louis’ eye as the older boy put his hand up to his mouth to hide his smile. ‘No, not that song. We were thinking of ‘Use Somebody’ actually.’

Simon was shaking his head. ‘Changing the song at the last minute to one you’ve not even practiced is an extremely risky move—’

‘Nah, we ‘ave practiced it,’ Niall interrupted, and he gestured at the stage. ‘We’ll do it right now, no worries.’

‘Have you got the music for it?’ Simon asked.

‘Niall will play, won’t you?’ Zayn said, standing.

‘Yeah, buddy.’ Zayn leant down and grasped Niall’s hand, helping him up onto the stage.

‘We’ll just perform it acoustic so you can see. We can do it proper with the backing track later on,’ Harry said, hopping up onto the stage.

Louis jumped the ledge easily in one bound. Liam tried uncoordinatedly to get his leg up, before Harry grabbed his elbow and hauled him up to join them. Liam gave Harry a crinkly-eyed smile, patting him on the chest in thanks, and Harry smiled back, before catching Niall looking at him across the stage. Niall blinked, looking down to fiddle with his guitar. Harry gazed at him, remembering the light kisses from the night before. He could still feel the ghost of them shiver across his skin.

‘What’s going on?’ Harry heard Savan ask Simon from the audience, breaking his reverie. ‘Are they doing the back-up song then?’

Simon replied, ‘I have no idea what they’re doing. Singing something else they prepared themselves, apparently.’ He collapsed into his seat with a huff, and reached for his water.

They got some microphone stands brought over, and Niall strummed the first couple of chords, refreshing his memory of the chords Dan and Sandy had showed him so long ago now. The studio fell quiet as the crew and the few other contestants in the room realised something new was happening. Harry caught Niall’s eye and gave him a short count, before all of them broke into a burst of ‘Oh-wah-oohs’ as Niall began strumming the chords, and the sound floated out across the auditorium.

Harry gripped the microphone, closing his eyes and leaning in close. ‘I’ve been roaming around! I was looking down, at all I see! Painted faces, fill the places, I can’t reach…’

Opening his eyes showed Simon frozen in his seat. His mouth was open against his forgotten water glass.

‘You know that I could _use_ somebody… yeah. You know that could _use_ somebody, yeah-e-yeah.’

‘Someone like you, and you all you know, and how you speak,’ Louis cut in, brilliant and clear.

Harry looked across at him, wanting to watch him sing.

To his surprise, Louis was looking back, singing to him, ‘Countless lovers, under cover of the street…’

Harry’s hands tightened on his microphone from the need to touch Louis.

Louis closed his eyes. ‘You know that I could _use_ somebody, yeah. You know that I could use somebody, yeah-e-yeah. _Someone like you_!’

Harry burst back to life, to join Liam and Zayn throwing back their heads with the, ‘Oh-wah-oohs’ while Niall played, waiting for his turn.

‘Off in the night! While you live it up, I’m off to sleep! Waging wars to shake the poet, and the beat...’ Niall turned his head to look down the line of boys, and his eyes cut sharp into Harry’s. ‘Well, I hope it’s gonna _make_ you notice! Well, I hope it’s gonna _make_ you notice… _someone like me!_ ’

Harry broke into the ‘oh-wah-oohs’ head spinning from the intensity of Niall’s gaze. He tried to shake it off, and lose himself in the song, rocking to Liam’s, ‘I’m ready now,’ nodding his head and building again for the chorus, opening his mouth wide for every sound, hearing nothing but the other boys and Niall’s guitar, until finally standing still.

He lowered his voice for the final line, letting an ache of emotion through. ‘I’ve been roaming around, I was looking down, at all I see…’

They finished off to sound of Savan and most of the crew that were down in the audience breaking into cheers. Harry smiled at them, and then he realised that Simon wasn’t clapping.

He wasn’t even smiling.

‘Alright, boys, we’ll do that song then. Someone get the backing track for it, I don’t care who, just get it. And someone else get me a cup of tea.’ Simon unhooked the tiny microphone from his shirt and left his chair, running a hand over his hair.

Harry stared, not sure if he’d even seen the man look so stressed, but in the next instant, Zayn was hooking an arm around Harry’s shoulders and pulling him in close, reaching around to fist-bump Liam.

Louis was practically vibrating. ‘Your guitar skills are _the_ _sickest_ , mate.’

‘Nah, I was alright.’ Niall rubbed his neck, a pleased pink colour covering his cheeks.

‘Cheeky chappie, you know you were amazing. You’ve been practicing all secret-like, haven’t you?’ Louis reached to mess up Niall’s hair, before draping himself over the blonde boy as Niall laughed.

‘Okay, I ‘ave a bit.’

‘Knew it.’ Louis lurched forward with Niall until they connected with Liam and Zayn, forming a huddle circle on stage. ‘We’re doing pretty good for ourselves, aren’t we lads?’

The others loudly agreed, all of them talking over one another.

Harry soaked up their voices, trying to stop thinking about Simon’s reaction. He spent the rest of the rehearsal day keeping himself distracting from thinking on it too hard, there was too much to do to get concerned with something that was probably minuscule anyway.

Everyone had to work extra hard because of the last minute song change, and the boys didn’t get another second to themselves until it was time to head back to the cars out the back and return to the X Factor house. Before they could leave though, Simon appeared and touched Harry’s shoulder.

‘Could I talk to you for a second, please Harry,’ Simon said, gesturing towards a small dressing room off the corridor.

Harry hesitated, looking back at his friends laughing and chatting as they continued walking. ‘Uh, yeah, alright then.’

He followed Simon into the dressing room, where Simon closed the door quickly. Harry stood awkwardly as the man ran a hand over his mouth.

‘Okay.’ Simon’s voice was quiet. ‘I need you to be straight with me here, Harry.’

Harry’s heart stopped in his chest, and he stared at the man. ‘Straight with what?’

‘You know what, and I need to hear you say it. I need to know the truth, so that we can be prepared in case it ever gets out into the media.’

Thoughts pounded wildly through Harry’s mind, and tried to remember if they’d done something different on stage. The image of Louis singing to him flashed through his mind, how they had looked at each other. Oh _fuck_ , Simon must have figured it out.

‘Just tell me the truth. I need to know, Harry.’

‘Know what?’ Harry choked out. ‘What do you want me to say?’

‘I need you to tell me,’ Simon lowered his voice further. ‘Did you know each other before boot-camp?’

Harry mind went blank with relief. It took a few seconds for the question to compute in his mind, and panic washed in again when it did. ‘What? _No._ ’

‘Harry, please, I’m trying to help you. I wasn’t born yesterday. I have been in this business for a long, long time.’ Simon’s gaze burned into him. ‘At first I may have thought you just had good chemistry, but it’s become increasingly obvious that you boys have known each other far longer than you’ve pretended. Years, probably.’

Harry couldn’t breathe.

‘Be honest with me now, because let me tell you, there is no newly formed band in the world that can pull a new song out of their behind like you boys did today. It just doesn’t happen.’

‘I don’t—we did meet at boot-camp though. We did.’

‘Harry.’ Simon pressed his lips together in a white line. 

‘We really did meet at boot-camp. It’s how we met. That’s how we—’ He was going to be sick. He was _going to be sick_.

Simon sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. ‘Fine. Try to keep the truth under wraps then, whatever it is, because the media will have an absolute field day with the scandal if they find out you boys were lying to the public.’

‘We’re not. We’re just—’ He was lying. He was lying right now, to a man he respected almost more than anyone else in the world.

‘All right. I get it.’ Simon said, opening the door and guiding him out of the dressing room. ‘I must admit, I am a little disappointed with you, Harry.’

Simon walked swiftly away down the corridor, and Harry stared after him until the man turned a corner, his breaths coming short and quick.

He tried to walk down the corridor after the other boys, and staggered into the wall instead. Heaving himself up, he saw a sign pointed to a nearby bathroom and somehow managed to push himself towards it. He banged open the first stall, dropped to his knees on the cold tiles and promptly threw up all of his lunch.

The pristine clean tiles finally stopped spinning a few minutes later, Harry dragged himself from the floor and washed his mouth and hands at the sink. His phone buzzed with a message from Liam, wondering where he was because the car had to leave soon. Harry sent him a quick message, _coming now sry_. He made his way out the bathroom and down the corridor, avoiding the gaze of any person he had to pass.

‘Yeah-hey! There he is!’ Louis cheered, hanging off Liam’s shoulders. ‘Oi, Niall! Quit chatting up the ladies, we have to go now!’

Niall had been talking to a couple of the stylist women, but he came back over at Louis’ call. Zayn was already in the car on his phone, but he hung up as they piled in, everyone except Harry talking loudly. He sat silent as the boom-gates at the back of the studio lifted, the guards waving them through by a group of fans, who screamed and waved banners when they saw the car.

Louis noticed Harry’s silence after a few minutes, and nudged him. ‘Where’d you disappear to, Curly? I thought you were right behind me in the corridor, and then I turned around and you weren’t.’

Harry coughed, trying to clear his throat of the left over arid taste. ‘Bathroom,’ he rasped.

Louis frowned. ‘Did you strain your voice again?’

Harry gave a weak shrug, taking the out Louis had given him. He didn’t want to talk about what Simon had said. In fact, right now he never wanted to talk ever again.

‘Aw,’ Louis said softly, putting his arm around him.

Harry let himself be cuddled, pushing his face into the older boy’s side and smothering himself with Louis’ shirt.

**1D**

Harry watched the kettle boil, hunching over the counter as the dishwasher chugged next to him, cleaning the dishes from dinner. As much as he tried to blank it out of his mind, Simon’s disapproving look kept swimming before his eyes, and he couldn’t stop replaying the conversation in his head. He wished that he’d said something, _anything_ , different instead of blabbering on like an idiot and freaking out.

‘Heya,’ Liam came up behind Harry tapping his shoulder. ‘Is there enough water for me?’

Harry hadn’t realised that his shoulders had tensed up, and he tried to relax them. ‘Yeah. Do you want a cup?’

‘Yes please.’ Liam grabbed a cup from the cupboard and placed it next to Harry’s, a goofy smile on his face.

Harry eyed him, noticing that his mouth looked kind of red and bitten. ‘Huh.’

‘What?’ Liam leant against the counter, still smiling.

‘Nothing. Just, Zayn’s a good kisser, isn’t he?’

Liam’s eyes widened and he seemed to sink against the counter. ‘I—uh, how did you know we—?’

‘Saw you two the other night.’

‘Oh, God. Did anyone else see?’ Liam covered his mouth with his hand.

‘No, only me. Don’t worry yourself, Payne.’

‘Oh, Christ.’ A laugh escaped through Liam’s hand. ‘I don’t even know what to say.’

‘He’s a good kisser though, right?’

Liam nodded, still touching his lips. ‘Most definitely good. Yes.’

‘Somebody’s blushing,’ Harry teased.

Liam punched him hard in the shoulder. ‘Shut up.’

Harry laughed. ‘Ow, okay. Can you pass the tea?’

Liam grabbed the box of tea bags and slid it towards Harry as steam rose from the spout of the kettle. Harry picked it up and carefully poured two cups. Liam’s hand came up and ran down Harry’s spine, steadying at the small of his back and watching him pour the tea.

‘I’ve never been like this though,’ Liam said. ‘I don’t know what I’m doing.’

‘Yeah, you do,’ Harry said easily.

‘No I mean,’ Liam’s clenched at Harry’s hip. ‘With a guy. With a friend. I’ve never—I don’t know why—’

‘You’re doing what makes you happy.’ Harry picked up his mug, engulfing it in his hands. ‘That’s all that should matter.’

‘People shouldn’t always do the things that make them happy,’ Liam said. ‘They don’t always get the choice to do so anyway because it’s just not the way real life works.’

Harry frowned. ‘I think the rules for that sort of thing went out the window when real life screwed us over. Our world isn’t like everyone else’s, so why should we have to think the same way as them?’

‘Because otherwise things might go horribly for us, Harry.’ Liam rested his chin on Harry’s shoulder. ‘But I can’t help myself, I just, it’s so…’ His hands tightened around Harry.

Harry turned to gaze at Liam, his eyes roving over his raw-bitten mouth and stopping on a large red hickey on his neck. Harry’s fingers twitched around his warm mug, and he set it down on the bench so he could reach one hand up and press his fingers into the red mark.

‘Zayn got you good,’ Harry murmured.

Liam grinned, dipping his chin without dislodging Harry’s hand. ‘Actually, that was all Louis. He surprise-attacked me when we were waiting at the car earlier.’

‘Oh, okay,’ Harry said, and he pushed his fingers harder into the shape Louis’ mouth had made on the other boy’s skin.

Liam’s throat flexed. ‘Yeah.’

‘Oh.’ A surprised voice came from the doorway.

Harry craned his neck back to see Esther standing open-mouthed at the door, staring at them and looking like she didn’t know which way to turn.

‘Hey, Esther,’ Harry said. ‘Are you after some tea as well?’

Esther’s gaze moved over them, taking in the way Liam was curled over Harry, and down to Liam’s arm around his waist. ‘Um. Are you…?’

Liam filled in. ‘Finished here? Yeah, no problem, we’ll get out of your way.’ Liam’s arm slid off Harry and he grabbed his cup of tea to take back to their room.

Harry stood by the bench, stirring his tea and silence filled the room as Esther kept going to say something before cutting herself off. Harry realised why she was so surprised, how he and Liam must have looked to her, and he opened his mouth to defend himself. There was nothing going on between them, she was jumping to the wrong conclusion. Strangely though, he found himself reluctant to speak the words.

Estelle’s eyebrows were high as she looked at him, waiting for an explanation.

‘There’s uh,’ Harry started. ‘There’s enough water left in the kettle for you.’

He avoided her incredulous stare and followed after Liam.

 

* * *

Thanks so much you guys. Hope you enjoy it. Comments and kudos are always appreciated, cheers! 


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Harry’s on tour and he feels on top of the world—until he wakes up one morning to find himself at the first day of the X Factor boot-camp, just sixteen years old again, and absolutely terrified that he’s just lost the last two years of his life.

The crowds roared, forming a wall of sound that hit Harry’s flushed face on the final chords. The lights of the stage were blinding and brilliant, and the other boys’ hands on his back pounded what little air he had left, out of his lungs as they hugged him. People stood in the audience, cheering wildly and Harry couldn’t even hear the judges trying to talk over the noise. Louis Walsh’s face shone in excitement, and Dannii’s blue eyes looked huge in her make-up, while Cheryl and Simon rose from their seats to give them a standing ovation, though Simon’s smile looked to be more contrived to Harry.

The arm around Harry’s neck pulled him in tighter, and Zayn’s cologne filled his nose. He breathed deeper, concentrating on the scent and the sweat glistening on Zayn’s neck and the audience’s screams in his ears.

**1D**

The next day rehearsing for the group performance was just as hectic as always, with the added stress of Harry trying to avoid Simon they whole day. The man was somehow managing to be accusing without actually once talking or looking at Harry and it was making Harry feel strange and small. Not only that, but it felt like there was a weird vibe amongst the other contestants, and Harry kept turning around to find them looking at him. Finally the day was drawing to a close with most of preparations that the boys needed to do all wrapped up for the results show, and Harry couldn’t be more relieved to finally be backstage.

‘—almost unnatural though, am I right?’ Geneva from _Belle Amie_ was saying to her band mates as Harry approached for his water bottle.

‘ _Gen_ , shh,’ Sophia shushed her quickly, her eyes on Harry.

All four of the girls fell silent as Harry grabbed his bottle and took a long draught, guzzling the liquid for his dry throat. The silence seemed loud in his ears as he drank and he could feel their eyes on him—and suddenly all he wanted was to be away from here. He smacked the top back down on his bottle and thumped it back on the small table, turning to leave. He couldn’t help glancing at the girls though, and he saw them exchanging glances and raising eyebrows. A hot horrible feeling like betrayal bubbling inside his stomach. These girls had been perfectly nice last time around, why were they like this now?

He stalked away, following the sounds of Niall’s laughter off to the side of the audience seats at the door of the backstage area.

‘Yeah, yeah, Liam!’ Louis was calling, and as Harry got close he could hear the sounds of Liam beat-boxing. ‘Come on, come on, rock that body!’

Harry turned the corner to find both Liam and Louis shaking their arses in time at a cameraman set up off to the side. He blinked for a moment, not sure what he was seeing for a moment. Niall was clutching his stomach in one of the audience seats, going red with laughing so hard.

Louis spun around raising his arms above his head. ‘I wanna rock right now. I wanna, I wanna rock right now, yeah!’ He gave a massive thrust of his hips, and Liam broke off his beat-boxing, half-coughing through his laugh as he fell into the seat at Niall’s side.

‘Harry.’ Louis jumped over to put an arm around him, and with a chipmunk voice asked, ‘Did you like my dance?’

‘You’ve done bigger thrusts than that,’ Harry said.

Louis slapped a hand over Harry’s mouth. ‘Naughty. There’s cameras about.’

‘I meant on stage. And there’s always cameras about.’ Harry ducked out from under Louis’ arm.

Louis narrowed his eyes. ‘What’s with you? You’ve been all weird and quiet for ages, did something happen?’

‘No,’ Harry sighed. ‘Think I’m just tired, and basically want to get away for a bit. Clear my head or something.’

The cameraman moved off now that the boys had stopped doing anything interesting, and Liam and Niall were both engrossed in conversation as they watched the crew moved about on stage. Zayn was nowhere to be seen, but most of the other contestants were milling about unneeded for the moment.

‘Right. We’re sneaking out then,’ Louis said decisively, and he grabbed Harry’s wrist pulling him around.

‘What do you mean? We can’t go now.’

Louis arched an eyebrow. ‘I _said_ we’re going to sneak out. What does that mean, Harold?’

‘Erm... we’re going to sneak out?’ Harry guessed.

‘Exactly. Got it in one.’ 

‘What if they need us on stage though?’

‘They won’t notice we’re gone, we’ll just pop out to the shops real quick like and get back.’

‘Like ninjas,’ Harry said, smiling.

‘Yes,’ Louis whispered, grinning at him. ‘Just like ninjas.’

He ducked to the floor and scuttled through the backstage door in a crouch. Trying not laugh, Harry followed his lead and crept out through the door. For most part they managed to remain unnoticed, ducking out of sight, rolling swiftly past doorways and crawling on the hands and knees at points before reaching the back exit out of the studio. Louis flung the door open with relish, startling the two guards by the boom-gate.

‘Hello there!’ Louis said. 

‘Ello. Where are you two trouble makers off to then?’ Bob, the larger of the two guards asked.

‘Just off to the shops, don’t mind us.’

‘Best be quick while it’s not raining.’ Bob took a sip from the coffee in his hand, the cardboard mug dwarfed in his large hands. ‘Those girls that were waiting for you here all went round the front to join the others under the shelter. They’ll be back soon enough though now the rains stopped.’

‘No worries,’ Louis said. ‘We’ll bring you back something from the store. Donuts are your favourite, right?’

Bob raised his free hand in thanks, beaming smile digging into his large cheeks, and they slipped by the boom-gate and left the guards behind.  

They walked up the road and turned the corner, and suddenly it was just Louis and him with the street open and empty before them. Harry couldn’t remember the last time it had just been the two of them in the wide open like this, and as a whoosh of cold air came over his face, and it was like all the clinging thoughts from the auditorium just dropped away.

He breathed deep, letting all the cold air into his lungs. ‘We should get some bags of lollies to eat,’ he said.

Louis was looking into the windows of the shops, and he hummed without turning. Harry frowned and tapped the older boy’s hand to get his attention.

Louis’ bright eyes flicked around to meet his, but flickered away just as quick. ‘Yeah, sure,’ he said, pulling his hands away and sliding them into his pockets, going back to looking into the windows.

Harry was kind of bemused by the other boy’s behaviour, and he examined his face carefully, noticing how his eyes flicked about and the strange tension in his neck like he was aware Harry was looking at him, and didn’t know what to do about it. Like Louis had never been alone outside with Harry before, which was plain ridiculous. He was being ridiculous.

Harry walked quicker to get in front of Louis, turning to walk backwards with his hands in his pockets, and gaze fixed on the older boy.

‘What are you doing?’ Louis asked, raising an eyebrow.

‘What are you doing?’ Harry returned, a sly grin digging into his cheeks. He mirrored Louis movement, taking a step back every time Louis took a step forward.

Louis kept his face blank, but he started taking slightly larger steps, nearly catching Harry’s shoes before he could step away. Harry laughed, speeding up and moving quicker. Then Louis propelled forward, nose coming right up close to Harry’s before Harry jumped away, laughing harder now. Louis grinned properly as he watched Harry. Success zinged through him and he kept staring back, trying to drink the older boy’s smile through his eyes.

‘Whoa—’ His heel hit a step sticking out on the pavement, and his stomach dropped as he tripped backwards, yanking his hands out of his pockets to flail. Louis caught his hand at the last second and saved him from falling.

‘You idiot,’ he said through his laughter.

‘Shut up,’ Harry said, bumping his shoulder into Louis’ as they started walking normally again. ‘You love it, don’t deny it.’

Louis gave him a long look, smile going a little smaller. ‘Come on, Styles, the shops are just up here.’  

**1D**

They were only gone twenty minutes in the store. Louis filled one the plastic baskets with every kind of sweets he could find, while Harry grabbed a couple cans of soft drink and energy drink, and they finished by piling large bags of crisps on top.

Two girls in the chips isle recognised them and asked them for photos, and the boys obliged easily. As they left the girls behind, Harry heard them squealing and saying something about twitter.

The cashier was a balding man in his late-thirties, and he wrinkled his nose when Louis slung an arm around Harry’s neck chatting as he poked with his other hand at the celebrities faces on the magazines on display. Harry pressed back against him, grinning wider at the cashier as the man harrumphed, turning away with disgust evident on his face.

Louis laughed when Harry told him after they left through the side exit of the store. ‘Are you serious? I didn’t even notice.’

‘I know,’ Harry said. ‘I even brushed my hand up your neck, and you just kept talking, even as he full on scowled at us.’

‘You bugger, you kept all the fun for yourself,’ Louis accused him. 

 They turned the corner, the plastic shopping bags bumping into Harry’s thigh as he laughed at Louis.

A high-pitched scream cut through their conversation, immediately multiplying a hundred fold in volume. Harry looked behind him.

A mass of girls milling near the main store front entrance were screaming at the top of their lungs all staring at him and Louis, jumping and pointing as they grabbed at each other. The two girls from inside the store must have posted their location on twitter, and all the girls out the front of the X Factor studio had come looking for them.

‘Whoa.’ Louis stared.

‘Oh, the fan-girls found us,’ Harry said.

‘There’s like three hundred of them,’ Louis said, eyes wide. ‘I hate to say it, Haz, but I think we’re going to die.’

‘We’re not going to die,’ Harry said, laughing. ‘They just want a picture or something.’

‘Oh my God!’ a girl screamed. ‘Harry Styles! Oh my God!’

Another started running. ‘I love you, Louis! Please marry me! _Marry me!_ ’

The girls rushed forward, screaming as they spilled out across the road and charged straight for them, waving posters and phones. All of them wearing the same rampant expression as they shrieked.

Louis tugged at Harry’s arm pulling him backwards. ‘Okay, okay, we have to run now.’

Harry tried to pull his arm free. ‘We’re not running from our fans, Lou.’

‘Yes, we bloody well are!’ Louis yanked hard on his arm, and Harry jerked forward, losing his grip on his shopping bag, and it dropped to the pavement and slumped over.

‘Hang on, Louis, I dropped the—’ Harry bent to grab it.

‘What are you _doing?_ ’ Louis’ voice went high.

‘Getting the bag—’

‘Leave the bag, it’s gone! There’s nothing we can do for it, Harry—now run!’

He looked up as horns blew from cars as the mob of girls charged across the road, the noise becoming deafeningly loud as the mass reached their side of the road, gaining within fifty metres of the two of them. The girl in the lead had huge wild eyes fixed on him, pushing ahead of the other girls, as she screamed his name in one continuous sound.

‘Louis, I think maybe—’

‘Just run!’

Harry allowed himself to be pulled back, Louis hauling on his arm, and the wind was blowing his hair into his eyes as he stumbles and nearly fell as Louis pulled him. Louis was shouting in his ear, but the screams of the girls were now too close and too loud to be heard over. They broke into a racing sprint, and the girls shrieked behind them. Harry risked a glance over his shoulder and saw them reach his abandoned shopping bag, their shoes tripping over it and pounding it into the cement, before one girl snatched it up and another tore at it, both of them wanting whatever was inside it, getting overtaken by the crowd of girls swarming past them.

Louis’ hand came down on Harry’s shoulder, wrenching his attention back to the front as they sprinted together past the row of shop-fronts.

Louis was yelling what sounded like, ‘Oh my God, they’re insane!’

Harry couldn’t help laughing at him as he ran. Louis caught his eye, his face full of disbelief and his eyes alight with excitement, and Harry knew he wore a similar expression. Cars continued to honk in the streets, shoppers stopped in the path and stared, mouth agape at the sight behind the boys while others snapped pictures with their camera-phones. They reached the end of the street swiftly, and dashed around the corner, Louis finally letting go of Harry’s shoulder so they could both run faster.

He can’t have imagined what they must have looked like racing around the corner, their clothes and hair flying wildly in the wind, Louis still yelling one long sound as his legs and arms pumped like pistons, with all the screams of the girls rendering through the air, still out of sight.

Harry saw Bob by the gate stand up from where he was leaning, frowning up the street at them, coffee still in hand. He saw the change in Bob’s face the moment the girls came around the corner after them. The coffee cup fell from Bob’s hand and his mouth opened, staring behind Harry and Louis at the mob of girls that spilled around the corner—and just kept coming after the two of them. Bob fumbled for his radio and spoke into it rapidly, as the other guard moved forward, his usually stoic face full of horror.

‘Harry!’ a girl shrieked from right behind Harry, and he felt finger-tips graze his shoulder. ‘I touched him! I actually touched him!’

There was a swell of sound behind them, impossibly even louder than before, the girls realising that the boys were almost about to escape back into the studio. Harry had never been incredibly athletic, the other boys had him beat in most of the sports they played, and it was telling now as Louis pulled slightly ahead of him, and another hand tugged at the arm of his jacket.

‘Harry, I _love_ you!’

Bob and the other security man stepped forward from the gate, holding their arms out like huge human trees, barricading the way for the girls. Louis reached them first, ducking under their arms and the boom-gate and springing up on the other side before looking back for Harry. Hands tugged at Harry’s clothes, nearly pulling him over as he tried to keep running, voice screaming and pleading with him not to go in his ears. He ducked under Bob’s arms and the two guards stepped closer then, yelling at the girls in booming voices to back off.

Harry staggered up on the other side of the boom-gate, and Louis steadied him briefly before pulling him towards the side entrance door. More security guards burst out of the door, before they could reach it, and they flattened themselves against the wall quickly as three more men and one woman rushed to help to the girls from following the boys under the gate. Louis and Harry slipped through the entrance and ran down the corridor, dodging several wide-eyed people as they made their way back to the main auditorium. They crashed through the backstage door and out into the audience floor, nearly tripping over Zayn, Liam and Niall in the process.

‘Oh my God!’ Louis clutched at the first person he got to, a surprised Zayn. ‘You’ll never fucking believe it! You won’t _ever_.’

‘What?’ Liam asked, hopping to his feet. ‘What’s happened?’

‘You been runnin’ or something?’ Niall asked, frowning.

‘Our new fans are insane!’ Louis said. ‘They tried to kill us!’

‘They didn’t.’ Liam looked aghast.

Harry tried to catch his breath. ‘Mildly deadly ones.’

‘You mean absolutely bonkers!’ Louis said, clinging to Zayn’s arm like he was about to fall over.

‘I don’t get it, what happened?’ Zayn said.

 ‘You should have seen it!’ Louis stood up and clasped Zayn’s face. ‘It was just like when we did the _Red and Black_ concert but actually real.’

Simon’s voice cut in sharply. ‘When you did the what?’

Harry spun about to see the entire room had stopped, and Simon was less than five feet away from them. People were staring at them, the other contestants looking confused at what was going on, and most of the crew on stage were listening to the radios and exchanging worried looks.

‘Did you just say, the _Red and Black_ concert?’ Simon repeated, brow crinkled and his eyes narrowing on Harry for the first time that day.

Harry’s mouth went dry, and all the other boys had gone silent staring at the man. Louis had gone pale, and he was half-covering his mouth like he could take back the words.

‘What do you mean—?’

‘Mr. Cowell, sir!’ A crew member rushed up to Simon. ‘There’s an issue at the back gate, the guards need permission to put up a temporary barrier.’

Simon continued to frown at the boys for a moment longer, before allowing himself to turn away. ‘Alright, I’m coming.’

The five of them gazed at each other in silence after he’d gone, before Louis broke it hoarsely. ‘Shit. I am so sorry. I didn’t mean to, I swear.’

‘Nah ‘tis fine. We can prob’ly pass it off as a joke or the like,’ Niall said, waving his hand and shrugging.

Harry didn’t feel so sure, and Liam and Zayn exchanged frowns.

‘Yeah, hopefully,’ Zayn said.

**1D**

They didn’t get cornered by Simon that night like Harry was expecting, instead because of the emergency with the girls and because they had nearly been finished anyway, they had been packed up into the cars and sent back to the house early.

News spread of what had happened amongst the contestants, and now even Mary, Rebecca and Cher were falling silent around him, like they were just talking about him before he entered the room. While Matt and Aiden had joked around a little with Harry about him loving the screaming fans chasing him, there had been an edge to it that he hadn’t quite liked. Meanwhile, the _Belle Amie_ girls seethed with almost visible jealousy every time he saw them, making comments that became increasingly biting. The other boys noticed the strangely tense atmosphere of the house during dinner, and they retreated to the games room afterwards, playing more quietly than they usually would.

Harry couldn’t sit still on the couch though. It felt like his nerves hadn’t quit racing all afternoon, and soon enough he stood up and tugged at Louis’ shirt collar, meaning for him to follow him. Louis gave up watching Liam and Zayn play, and followed Harry without asking why, padding up the stairs in his bare feet behind Harry and up to their empty bedroom.

‘Crazy day, huh?’ Louis said, once Harry closed the door.

Harry answered him by pushing forward and digging his hand into Louis’ hair, capturing his lips in a hard kiss. Louis didn’t miss a beat, clutching back at Harry and pulling him in tight, he tilted his head back and let Harry just take what he wanted. Harry had his eyes closed tight as he licked further into the other boy’s mouth, and Louis dug his hands into Harry’s hipbones, a small moan vibrating in his throat when Harry thrust his tongue right inside his mouth and pushed it against the wet muscle there.

‘Har—’ Louis pulled back for air, and Harry took the opportunity to push them both forward to the beds.

He moved his hand to the top of Louis’ head and shoved him down so he wouldn’t hit his head on the frame of the top bunk, and Louis fell onto the lower bunk, spreading his hands on the mattress to steady himself and gazing up at Harry with dark eyes. Harry followed him down, climbing onto his lap, having to keep his body bent to stop his head hitting the top bunk, and kissing Louis again. He tugged at the hem of Louis’ shirt, but couldn’t stop kissing him long enough to pull it over his head.

Louis battered his hands away from the material, pulling free with a gasp. ‘Stop—stop it, you’ll rip it. Let me—’ Louis pulled his shirt over his head and threw it away.

Harry scrambled forward again, running his hands over every bit of Louis’ skin he could reach, from his broad shoulders down over his muscled chest the planes of his stomach. He dug his finger-nails into the dip of Louis’ hips where they met Harry’s spread legs and up again, thumbing over Louis’ nipples, and smoothing up to grip the back of his neck once more. Harry leaned in to bite into his lower lip, tightening his thighs, and rolling down on Louis’ lap.

‘Oh, fuck.’ Louis groaned. His whole body shivered, his arm coming around swiftly to grab Harry’s waist, stopping him from moving any more. ‘Wait, wait. Are we—?’

‘Yes,’ Harry said, capturing Louis’ lips again, his hands shifting down to the button of the older boy’s jeans and thumbing it open.

Louis jerked his head free again, his hair mussed and sticking up. ‘Hang on, you want to actually, like really—’

‘I’m saying I want you to fuck me, Tomlinson,’ Harry said into the older boy’s neck.

‘Jesus, _fuck_ ,’ Louis said, his hips jerking into Harry.

 He wanted to feel nothing else but Louis everywhere, wanted to be so close that he couldn’t breath anything but the other boy. He wanted to block everything else out and just be with Louis. He gasped wetly against Louis’ skin, the tight friction already feeling so fantastic, he almost didn’t want to move and he rolled his hips again, trying to get more of it as he mouthed along the other boy’s neck.

Louis’ arm around his waist tightened, and he huffed into Harry’s hair, stopping him from moving once more. ‘You need to get lube.’

Harry dug his teeth into Louis’ neck to show what he thought about that. Louis’ hand came up and shoved between Harry’s face and his neck, his fingers clawing into Harry’s mouth, pressing Harry’s head right back until they could see eye to eye again.

‘Get the lube, Harry,’ Louis repeated lightly, his eyes holding a wicked gleam.

Harry resisted, glaring down at him, but Louis just licked his lips instead. He pushed firmly at Harry’s throat, forcing him to lean further and further back on his lap, until he was uncomfortably bent backwards from his kneeling position.

‘The lube,’ Louis repeated.

Harry pants were painfully tight now. ‘Fine,’ he agreed.

Louis let go instantly, and Harry rolled off him to the floor. ‘In Liam’s bag, the far-left pocket,’ Louis said.

‘Why does Liam have lube? And how do you know?’ Harry said, yanking Liam’s bag towards him and rifling through the pocket.

‘Seen him use it, haven’t I? And trust me, a strapping, virile male like Payne needs it.’

Harry glanced back at Louis to see he had unzipped himself, pushing his hand down and lightly squeezing himself as he watched Harry bending over the bag.

‘Bastard,’ Harry muttered, finally finding the tube he was looking for. He stood up and chucked it at Louis.

‘Careful of the goods,’ Louis said, rubbing his chest where it had struck him.

Harry took no notice, shucking his shirt and trousers to five seconds flat, and freeing himself from the uncomfortable constriction. He threw his clothes across the room, standing up tall and moving back over to the bed.

Louis had one leg bent up and the other stretched out, his eyes still dark on Harry as his hand continued to dip into the open of his jeans. He raised an eyebrow as Harry just stood there watching him.

Harry raised his arms up to grab to frame of the top bunk and indulgently stretched his body out. He flexed his body into long line of pale muscle, his eyelids lowering and mouth parting as he put everything on display for Louis. The older boy’s cool façade faltered, his hand stilling on himself, and his eyes flicking all over Harry hungrily.

Harry said nothing, he only smirked slowly.

‘Shut up,’ Louis said, lunging up for him to grab him by the elbows and pull him down. Harry went easy, sliding down on top of Louis and resuming straddling the other’s lap. Louis and smoothed over his back and down to his thighs pulling him in closer and drifting up to play along the curves of Harry’s arse.

Harry breathed out into Louis’ mouth, goose-bumps going right up his spine. ‘Lou, please, can we—’

‘Yeah, it’s alright, babe, I’ve got it,’ Louis mumbled.

Harry blinked at the pet-name, curling warmth returning to slide around in his stomach, while one of Louis’ hands left his skin to fumble amongst the blankets for the lube. His other hand stayed firm around Harry’s bare waist keeping him there as he groped about.

‘Got it. Here just, hold out your hand.’

Harry held his hand obediently, and Louis unclipped the lid, squirting a generous amount of cool thick liquid on Harry’s fingers.

‘There, now just— _holy fuck!_ ’ Louis gasped as Harry dropped his lubed hand straight to Louis’ dick and slicked the stuff right up it.

Louis bent forward, straining to stop himself from bucking up into Harry’s hand. ‘I meant it for yourself.’

Harry sniggered at his outrage in his voice. ‘I don’t want it.’

‘What?’ Louis tried to sit up more and failed. ‘You have to, you’ll get hurt. You don’t know what you’re doing.’

‘And you do?’ Harry raised his eyebrows, and twisted his hand over Louis’ head, making the older boy’s eyes roll back.

‘Oh God—I looked it up, who cares? You just have to.’

Harry leant forward and to bit his neck, shifting his hips up so that Louis’ tip was just touching his opening. ‘Shouldn’t believe everything you read on the Internet,’ he murmured.

Louis’ mouth setting in a line though, his eyes turning to steal. ‘Not gonna hurt you like that.’

Harry gazed at him, before leaning forward, and gently bumping his lips into Louis’. ‘Want to feel you. I promise you won’t hurt me.’

Without waiting for an answer, he reached back to take Louis in hand again, guiding it to press up and breach inside him. Louis kept his gaze the whole time as Harry slowly let himself open, feeling the strange, thick intrusion spreading his walls. He closed his eyes and puffed out a breath half-way, his thighs starting to shake from the pleasure and pain of it. Louis free hand touched Harry’s face and he reopened them, surprising himself to find they were watering a little. Louis was looking at him with a kind of strained concern, but his eyelids fluttered when Harry slid another inch down, and his lips looking wet and raw left open like that.

Harry breathed out a curse when he slipped down several more inches, and found himself touching Louis’ lap once again, the whole of his length throbbing inside of him.

‘Oh, God,’ Louis said. ‘I’m fucking you.’

Harry laughed, shifting experimentally. ‘I know.’

‘Harry. I gotta—I have to, please—’

‘You can.’

‘Fuck.’ Louis arm tightened around his waist and he pushed up inside Harry. ‘Oh, _fuck_.’

Harry gasped as he felt Louis surge up thick inside of him. He curled his fingernails into the skin of Louis’ shoulders, trying to breath through the daze the feeling left him in, his insides reeling from the sudden flux of feeling where he’d never felt anything before. Louis gripped the back of Harry’s head and thrust up again, his lips parting on a groan as he did.

‘Uh—’ Harry bite down on Louis’ neck to stop sound escaping from him as he body parted and reeled in the wake of Louis again, feeling like Louis was pushing past his belly right up to his lungs.  He moaned at the feeling, unaware he was actually doing it, until Louis started swearing.

‘Fuck, you sound like a fucking—’

Louis’ hands stroked over Harry’s lower back, pushing harder up into Harry, his hips lifting him up in a rolling motion of skin and cut off breaths. Fumbling senselessly, Harry found Louis’ lips again, gasping into them. Gripping Louis’ shoulders, his eyes closed, he touched their lips touched on every upthrust, both of them too lost in the feeling to attempt more than that. His own cock was trapped between their bodies, sliding slickly on Louis’ stomach muscles and leaking all over them.

Louis moved, one hand coming up to grip under Harry’s arms, the other tightening on his waist. Pressing their lips together more firmly, he pushed up to his knees, and Harry’s mouth fell open, all the air whooshing from his body, and his eyes rolling back at deeper angle. Louis rolled them over and lifted Harry higher with separating them, wedging Harry’s body up against the wall. Harry’s bent his head as it nearly knocked into the frame of the bunk above them, and he lifted his hands off Louis to clutch at the frame and stop him bashing into it on every push. He was resting mostly on Louis’ lap now, the older boy keeping him up with every push and thrust as his mouth devoured Harry’s, stealing nearly all of Harry’s breath, his fingers nearly bruising in their firm grip.

‘Uh, oh, fuck, uh, uh—’ sounds slipped from Harry’s mouth as Louis just kept pressing up and up into him.

His limbs felt unattached, and a white glaze was taking over everything he could see. Louis was filling all of him, delving up into him like he was forging a place for him to always stay, and all Harry could feel was that thick length pressing right up inside him, owing all of him.

Then the door opened.

Harry’s eyes snapped to the white door as Zayn entered, the smile of Zayn’s face falling as his gaze met Harry’s, and a purely stunned expression taking over.

‘Close the door,’ Harry managed, as Louis who hadn’t notice, shoved right up inside him and hit a spot that made the world fizz out into pleasure.

He opened his eyes again in time to see Zayn smack the door shut right on a chatting Liam and Niall. He slammed his body right up against the door, blockading them from getting inside, eyes as huge as two moons.

Louis’ breath was loud in Harry’s ear, and Harry whined as he pushed up faster, the top bunk bed banging as Harry pushed on it hard enough to accidently lift it. Louis’ hips were working into him, and Harry suddenly wondered what Zayn could see; if he could see Louis’ naked arse clenching with every thrust. Then Harry had no air left, he was gone.

He closed his eyes as waves of pleasure spread over him, shaking and tightening his entire body so that he clenched down on Louis, sending streams of white up the older boy’s torso.

‘Fuck, fuck,’ Louis muttered, each thrust moving strongly and wildly inside Harry until finally he shoved right in and stayed there, and Harry had the odd sensation of warm liquid releasing and spreading deep inside him.

They breathed into each other for a long moment, muscles still twitching and eyelashes fluttering. Slowly, Louis let Harry down off the wall and even more carefully, pulled out of him. Harry moaned, suddenly feeling the rawness of his stretched muscle, and Louis rubbed his shoulder, hushing him quietly.

Remembering that they had a spectator; Harry lifted his eyes to Zayn, still standing like a mouse caught in a trap by the door.

Harry licked his lips, waiting for the daze to clear enough for him to talk. ‘Hey.’

‘Hi,’ Zayn croaked.

Louis twisted around, mouth opening in surprise. ‘What the hell, Zayn? When did you get there?’

‘Ah…at the—end.’ Zayn averted his eyes to the ceiling, his hand still gripping the knob of the door tightly, and the veins in his arms standing out.

‘Oh,’ Louis said, and Harry could feel his chest vibrate with restrained laughter. ‘So you, just walked in, right on us—’

‘Yes!’ Zayn said, closed his eyes, banging his head back against the door.

Louis rolled laughing to the side, his body all languid and sweaty, and Harry looked at him amused.

‘Zayn?’ Liam’s muffled voice came through the door. ‘Is everything okay?’

‘Yeah, we’re fine,’ Zayn called. ‘It’s fine.’

‘Why won’t you let us in then?’ Liam asked, and the doorknob moved slightly.

Zayn forced his weight back more firmly. ‘No. Keep the door closed.’

Harry crawled forward to the edge of the bed, grinning. ‘Why not, Zayn, what’s the problem?’ He stood up and instantly regretted it. ‘ _Fuck_.’ Pain shot through his insides, turning his legs to jelly, and he stumbled forward.

Zayn let go off the door to catch him instinctively. ‘You okay?’

‘Yeah, it aches a bit,’ Harry breathed. ‘S’fading though, so I think it’s fine.’

Zayn stared down at him; one hand low on Harry’s back, holding him up even though he was stark naked. ‘Hang on, was that—was that the first time you two have done that?’

‘Yup.’ Louis lolled onto his side, and propped up head to gaze at them. ‘Congratulations on witnessing the fine event.’

‘Fucking—’ Zayn closed his eyes again, breathing through his nostrils.

‘Lads? Can we come in?’ Niall called through the door.

‘No,’ Zayn yelled.

‘Why not?’ Harry asked. ‘I don’t mind, they should know anyway.’

‘No, you are not telling them like this.’ He pulled his hand away from Harry’s back, and Harry saw his finger-tips were glistening with white. ‘First you are going to clean up, because you are leaking everywhere.’

Harry heard Louis cackle from the bed, and he smiled sheepishly. ‘Whoops. Sorry.’

Zayn still looked kind of pissed, his eyes dark.

‘Here, I’ll clean it,’ Harry said, leaning forward and pulling the fingers into his mouth. The salty taste blooming through his mouth as he licked up every trace of Louis on Zayn’s hand. Zayn went very still as he did it, and then wrenched his fingers away, releasing them from Harry’s lips with a slight pop.

‘Great, I’ll leave you to it, then.’ Zayn muttered.

He let go of Harry quickly, moving to the door and opening it only a gap so he could slide through before closing it again. Harry heard Niall and Liam start showering him with questions about what was going on, but he couldn’t hear Zayn’s reply. He turned back to the bed, and Louis stretched out his hand, beckoning him. Harry took it eagerly, falling back onto the bed, and lying sidelong next to Louis.

‘Pulling moves like that does things to a man, Styles,’ Louis said.

‘Oh, yeah? How so?’

Louis raised himself above Harry, leaning over him while his deft fingers went below to press at Harry’s still leaking hole. ‘You know exactly how. Zayn’s right, you are leaking everywhere.’ He dug his fingers inside Harry, pressing right into him, moving the slick about inside.

Harry grunted at the sudden intrusion, now that he was lying down again, the soreness easing to something more pleasant again.

‘That okay?’ Louis asked, eyes curious.

‘Yeah,’ Harry sighed. ‘It’s great.’

‘Hmm.’

Louis moved up and above him more, pulling Harry’s legs a part as he did it, before suddenly pressing the head of his hard length inside.

‘Again?’ Harry asked, shifting, his leg wider.

Louis winked. ‘Guess you’re just that sexy,’ and he pushed right in once more.

Harry groaned, biting his lip as he was filled again. Louis moved more slowly this time, pressing in and out in smooth strokes that went right up deep inside Harry, pausing there straining inside him and tickling the very edge of a spot that made Harry whimper out loud. Louis reached up and folded one of his hands around Harry’s, clenching it tight to his as he shifted, while his other hand held himself up from falling on Harry.

Harry gasped and shifted as Louis moved with him, this time the two of them somehow, impossibly, felt even closer than before. They were both quieter this time, and Harry couldn’t take his eyes off Louis’ face. Harry could feel everything building to a point again, his every breath coming shaky and wrenching through him, as he gazed up at the older boy, whose now sweaty hair was falling forward into his eyes, and his neck tensed every time he pushed really deep.

‘God,’ Louis gasped. He lowered his head and nudging at Harry’s bottom lip. ‘ _Harry_.’    

Nothing seemed to matter except for hard Louis was clenching his hand, and that hovering moment when Louis paused deep inside him, leaving both of them unable to bring in air.

Harry realised, as his chest heaved beneath Louis’, that this didn’t feel like just fun. This felt like much more than just fun.

 

* * *

 

 

Hey thanks for reading! Tell me what you think either below or on my [tumblr](http://louis-cuddle.tumblr.com/).

I'm writing another fic atmo that's just Harry/Louis and I'm kind of excited about it. X


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi! I'd like to once more point out the tags above ^^ read on if you dare

Harry rolled onto his side, his head lolling as he pressed his open mouth into the pillow. Sweat covered his whole body, his limbs a heavy kind of pleasant like they were moving through honey and he couldn’t seem to settle on any one thought. He heard the door open and click shut as Louis returned, and a moment later the mattress dipped and sunk as the older boy sat down, rocking the bed enough to make Harry squint up at him even though the ceiling light was in his eyes.

‘What were you doing?’ Harry asked.

‘Just getting this.’ Louis held up what looked like one the hand-towels from the bathroom.

‘What for?’

‘To clean you up, Harold, you’re a mess now.’ Louis flicked to Harry’s bare arse-cheek.

‘Oh,’ Harry sighed, rolling onto his stomach. ‘Go on then.’

‘Such a charmer,’ Louis murmured.

A moment later the damp cloth touched Harry’s lower back, and he instantly tried to pull away. ‘Oi, it’s wet.’

‘Good observation. Stay still, this is a delicate business.’

Harry groaned. He rested on his elbows and let his head fall down to touch the pillow. ‘You should be nice to me. I can hardly move now.’

He could practically hear Louis roll his eyes. ‘That’s why I’m doing this, so you don’t have to. There’s stuff all over your thighs and you’re getting it everywhere.’

‘ _You_  got it everywhere,’ Harry retorted.

A sharp smack landed on his arse, causing his eyes to go wide and his mouth to drop open.

He spluttered. ‘Did you just— _spank_ —me?’

‘You should behave yourself, Styles,’ Louis said, trying not to laugh. ‘I’m in control here.’

‘If you say you’re going to punish me, I’ll get up and leave.’

‘Rubbish. Now, stay still.’ Louis pressed his fingers into the back of Harry’s neck, and again the wet cloth touched his skin.

Harry shivered but he held his position, his hair in his eyes and his shoulder-blades jutting out. Louis slid the cloth over his skin, dipping it down between the backs of his thighs and Harry closed his eyes as he waited. Louis rubbed his thumb lightly into Harry’s neck as he dragged the cloth back up and Harry let himself get used to the lull of the motion.

‘Ease up,’ Louis said softly, breaking the quiet a few minutes later. ‘Let me do the front.’

Louis pulled back so that Harry could push himself up, but his insides twinged in protest half-way there, and he had to stop and breathe for a second. Louis helped him the rest of the way up, moving his legs off the bed.

‘You alright? Is it really hurting?’

‘Nah. Just in pangs or something. I don’t want to move much though ‘cause it feels weird. All empty, you know?’

‘Right,’ Louis licked his lips. He slopped the cloth onto Harry’s stomach and wiped it through the white mess spread out across it, his other arm squeezing tight for a moment around Harry’s shoulders. Wiping the cloth quickly down over Harry’s navel, and then up to catch a bit he missed near Harry’s nipple.

‘There. Zayn said he’s gonna bring the other lads up in a minute to talk, so we should put some pants on or something.’ Louis got up and threw the cloth in the general direction of the pile of laundry clothes heaped in the corner.

‘Pants?’ Harry wrinkled his nose. ‘Why pants?’

‘We are not having this conversation without everyone wearing pants. It’s the polite thing to do in this situation.’

‘Did you research that too?’

‘Just wear these, Curly.’

Louis ditched a pair of his grey sweat-pants at him. Harry grumbled a little, but did what he was told and slipped them on since at least they would be loose on him. A knock on the door came a moment later as Harry gingerly sat down again.

‘Can we come in now?’ Zayn called through the door.

‘Yeah, okay,’ Louis called back, and a moment later the door opened and the other three members entered.

‘Urgh, it stinks in ‘ere,’ Niall said on coming in, and he didn’t seem to notice when no one answered him.

Harry brought this legs up and scooted back to carefully sit cross-legged on the bed. The other boys dropped themselves anywhere there was a comfortable place, Zayn sprawling out on his bed with Liam perching on the end next to Zayn’s feet, and Niall sinking down onto the floor and fiddling with his socks as he looked up at the other boys.

‘So, what’s going on?’ Liam asked. ‘Zayn wouldn’t say anything.’

Louis stood by the door, his arms crossed over his shirtless torso, and Harry eyed the way his biceps bulged when the older boy tucked his hands under them.

‘Louis?’ Zayn spoke up.

Louis shifted against the wall, his tongue nipping out to wet his lips. ‘Right, uh…’ he stopped, his eyes flicking to Harry.

Harry gestured with his hands. ‘See like, Louis and I kind of have this thing going on.’

‘Thing?’ Liam frowned.

‘Yeah.’

Niall and Liam gave him blank looks, while Zayn crossed his arms in a mirror of Louis.

Harry figured he just had to say it. ‘Basically, we’re shagging?’

Thick silence fell over the room.

‘Is this a joke?’ Niall asked after a moment.

‘No, for real,’ Louis said with a half-smile, looking back to Harry. ‘I mean, you gotta admit, it’s something that’s been coming for awhile.’

‘Why didn’t you tell us?’ Liam’s shoulders were tense and his eyebrows low. ‘You never said anything. When did this happen?’

‘About, um, seven minutes ago?’ Louis said. ‘On the bed Harry’s sitting on.’

Four faces turned towards Harry at the same time to stare at him, like they were all visualising how it had worked.

‘It was good, if you’re wondering,’ Harry said, and he didn’t miss the way Louis’ face turned smug.

‘Wait, that’s why it smells in here? Because you—’ Liam turned to Zayn, his eyes huge. ‘And you walked in on them?!’

‘Yeah, unfortunately.’ Zayn avoided Liam’s wide gaze, his nostrils flaring again. ‘It was a bit of a shock.’

‘Is it really though?’ Harry asked. ‘I mean, you knew something was going on between us. It’s like, the next logical step. Anyway you and Liam have your thing going on.’

Louis straightened from the wall. ‘Thing? You two have a  _thing_?’

‘So what if we do?’ Zayn shot back at him.

‘You never told me.’ Louis frowned.

‘Well, I can say the same of you,’ Liam said, steadfastly ignoring the red in his cheeks. ‘We didn’t plan it or anything. We just seem to snog sometimes, but nothing like…  _that_.’ He gestured at the bed Harry was sitting on.

‘What, not even blow-jobs?’ Harry asked.

Liam’s cheeks redden further. ‘No. Of course not.’

‘We’re not doing anything dangerous, not like you two are,’ Zayn said.

‘Dangerous?’ Louis repeated. ‘How is what we’re doing  _dangerous_?’

‘Exactly. You don’t think about stuff properly.’ Zayn scowled at him.

‘Excuse me, but what’s crawled up your arse, Malik?’

Zayn stood up to meet Louis. ‘I’m just saying, I wish you’d think about stuff before getting into it.’

‘Hey, it’s not any problem,’ Harry protested, looking between them.

‘So, wait,’ Niall spoke up from the floor, and Harry looked at him, suddenly realising the blonde lad had been quiet all this time. ‘Both o’ you are each together? You and Harry, and you and Liam?’

Niall’s face lacked any sign of emotion. It wasn’t a look Harry could remember ever really seeing him wear, and sickness rose in Harry’s gut at the silence that dragged out between them. Niall’s eyes went hollow, his shoulders slumping shapelessly, breathing like he had to remind himself to pull air in.

‘Niall…’ Louis dropped his arms.

Niall shook his head briefly. ‘Whate’er. Congratulations, I guess.’

He got to his feet quickly, avoiding any of their eyes and making for the door.

Zayn stepped in his way, catching his wrist. ‘Niall, come on, man, we didn’t mean to—’

‘It’s done now, so what does it matter?’ Niall pulled his arm out of Zayn’s grip and slipped between him and Louis to get out of the room.

‘Niall, no, wait!’ Harry scrambled up, feeling jittery with panic all of a sudden, and he leapt off the bed to reach the Irish boy before he left, but pain punched him from the inside out before he even took two steps, and all the air forced from his body in a whoosh as his legs failed him. Harry thumped to his knees and gasped for a second, clutching at his stomach.

‘Shit, what the hell?’ Zayn’s hand was on his back.

‘Harry?’

‘Is he alrigh’?’

‘Yeah. I’m fine,’ Harry wheezed, the stab of pain already fading and annoyance pressed into his tone. ‘I’m fine.’

He pushed off Zayn’s hands, glad that at least that Niall had stopped at his fall, the Irish boy’s expression clearly torn. Liam had stood up from the bed and was hovering anxiously, and Louis’ face had gone stricken as he looked down at Harry.

‘I’m fine.’ He scowled at Louis as he got up, reaching for Niall. ‘We didn’t mean to leave you out like that.’

‘Well, you did.’ Niall’s lips pressed together and his hand closed on the doorhandle.

‘No.’ Harry shoved forward, standing in the way of the door. ‘We really—I meant, I would never hurt you.’

‘Harry, come, on, just let me leave, okay?’ Niall’s cheeks were going blotchy and he as he looked away up to the ceiling, and Harry was devastated to see his eyes going wet.

‘Please don’t.’ Harry gripped Niall’s shirt. ‘Niall, you know we love you.’

‘Yeah, I kno’, and I can see how you lads have ended up doing this, but I jus’ wish—’ Niall stopped, licking his lips and he rubbed a hand at his eyes. ‘I mean, none of you picked me.’

‘Niall, no.’ Harry cupped Niall’s face between his hands trying to make the other boy look at him. ‘Please, listen.’

Niall tried to push Harry’s hands off, shaking his head. ‘Stop it, Harry.’

‘No, listen. We’re not leaving you out.’

‘Yeah, best of friends and all that.’ Niall moved to get past him.

‘No—’ He pulled Niall in, his shoulders tense up to his ears and he pulled Niall in. ‘I don’t want anyone left out. Please, don’t go, just, I—’ He met Niall’s lips with his own, putting all the words he couldn’t say into the kiss.

 Niall made a noise low in his throat, and the room went dead quiet for a third time as Niall briefly responded to him, before his hands were up and shoving Harry back. Niall glared at him, and actual tears were falling from his eyes now, his cheeks scrunching as he stared at Harry like he’d betrayed him. ‘I don’t need your pity, Harry.’

Harry almost shouted. ‘It’s not  _pity_.’

‘It is.’ Niall slipped past him and was out the door before he could stop him.

Harry turned back to look at the others, at Liam whose mouth was open and looked like he had no idea what had just happened, over a pissed off Zayn, and stopping on Louis.

Louis’s face had gone blank with shock, his hands limp by his sides. Harry couldn’t take it. He didn’t want to know what Louis was thinking—what any of them were thinking. He spun about and almost tripped trying to rush out of the room. He flung the white door shut behind him, blocking off the other three’s faces and hurried down the corridor away from them. His insides twinged in protest, and he curled an arm around his bare stomach, grimacing as he kept moving, suddenly really needing a glass of water to ease the burn in his throat. He turned into the kitchen, only to find half the other contestants there, all of whom looked up when he came in.

‘Why, ‘ello,’ Mary said from where she was sat at the table. ‘I ‘spose we should be thankful the famous star has some trousers on for once.’

‘I wonder if his fans would still love him if they knew he had four nipples,’ Geneva said, and the other  _Belle Amie_  girls laughed from the bar-stools.

‘You alright, mate?’ Matt frowned. ‘There’s been a lot of noise coming from your end of the house tonight.’

‘M’fine,’ Harry muttered. ‘Just wanted some water.’

‘Ooh, problems in boy-band paradise,’ Sophia called.

Harry ducked his head to hide his expression, quickly grabbing a glass and filling it up from the filtered water tap.

‘Oh my God, are you guys really fighting?’ Esther asked, leaning forward across the counter.

Harry swallowed his water, eyeing her steadily. Her expression was exactly the same as a gossip interviewer, eager for a story and wanting a quote from him. He frowned, and ignored her question.

‘Has Niall been through?’ he asked dully.

‘Niall?’ Mary raised her eyebrows. ‘No, I ‘aven’t seen the little blonde lad since we got back. Why, what’s he done?’

‘Nothing, forget it.’

He set the glass down, and went to leave, feeling stifled by all their expectant eyes and once in the hallway, he heard Sophia say to her friends, ‘Was Harry wearing Louis’ pants?’ and loud laughter flooded out of the kitchen a moment later.

Harry hunched over, their laughter loud in his ears as he escaped down the steps and out the back door. He stayed there in the cool night air until he couldn’t hear anymore noise from inside the house and all the lights had gone off.

When he finally crept back upstairs to the boys bedroom, he found the other four all silent lumps in the beds, faces each turned towards the walls. He climbed up into his bunk as quietly as possible.

All the problems from the day had come swamping back into his mind. He kept getting flashes of Louis’ touch and feel and Niall crying, and Louis’ shocked face after he’d kissed Niall, and the fans screaming at him and Simon’s face afterwards, and the contestants laughter—and all through everything was this heavy-sick feeling going— _you’re fucking it up, you idiot._

_You are fucking it all up._

**1D**

The next morning Harry woke to find Louis, Liam and Niall were up and gone from the room, only Zayn was still curled up in his bunk. Harry pushed his hair back from his eyes and he sighed. He could already tell it was going to be a long day.

Once finally rising from his bed, he was caught up in the usual rush and mess that happened before a results show, with most of the other contestants sinking into their own heads and picking apart their own performances, and everybody anxious for the night show to come already

For the first time as far back as Harry could remember the car ride was awkwardly quiet with all five of them inside. Louis had slipped his sunglasses on, despite the grey morning light, and Zayn next to him was gazing stonily out the window, his only movement when the car made his body sway. Niall had greeted Harry a good morning, but he couldn’t help noticing the Irish boy had then sat himself in the furthest seat away from Harry, leaving him to squish between the door and Liam, was who sat with his hands in his lap and staring at the floor, lost in thought the entire way.

Once at the studio it was back to business with last minute rehearsals for the group performance, and their last chances songs if they happened to be in the bottom two, and then they were rushed away to hair and make-up with everyone else. Harry managed to get away for a breather while the stylist was distracted with Treyc’s hair, and he made his way to a couple of vending machines down one of the hallways.

One of the security men was already there, reading a newspaper he’d folded in half as he chewed on a nut-bar. His greying eyebrows went up when he saw Harry.

‘Hallo there, young Styles. You must be pretty stoked today, eh? With your picture in the paper and everything.’

Harry stopped, confused. ‘My what?’

‘On the front page, that one of you and Louis Tomlinson, running down the street,’ the man said cheerfully. He flipped the newspaper over and showed Harry the front page. ‘See?’

On the cover was a giant picture of Louis and Harry in mid-run. Louis’ mouth was open in a half-laughing yell, his body twisted around as he ran and tugged on Harry’s wrist at the same time, and he looked perfectly excited and thrilled by the whole thing. Harry himself just looked overwhelmed, his own eyes wide with disbelief as he ran after Louis, limbs all lanky and hair flying everywhere. Behind them was a blurred flood of girls screaming faces as they chased the boys down the street, and above the whole picture the title screamed:  

X FACTOR STARS FORCED TO FLEE FROM FAN MOB!

‘Hey, can I get your autograph for my niece? She’ll love it, I know.’

‘Yeah, no worries,’ Harry agreed distractedly. He took the pen the man handed him and automatically signed the paper his brain skipping back to the fact that they were on the front page of a newspaper. Not just a tabloid magazine or a brief article just to sell more papers, but actual news about a stampeding mob over a music icon, something Harry couldn’t ever remember happening in his lifetime, and certainly not where anyone was forced to literally run away.

The man looked surprised when he got the paper back. ‘Well, that’s a right proper signature there, lad. Just like a celebrity’s.’

Harry thanked him and wandered back towards the studio, forgetting to get anything from the vending machine.

When he was nearly back to the dressing rooms though he saw Simon, with an entourage of assistants and people hurrying about talking on head-sets and tapping blackberries coming down the corridor. Harry pushed himself back against the wall, meaning to let them all pass him, but Simon slowed when he saw him there.

There was something cautious in Simon’s face as he asked, ‘Alright there, Harry?’

‘Uh, yeah?’

‘We’re going to be all good for tonight, so don’t worry about that.’

Harry nodded, not trusting himself to speak.

Simon paused for a second longer, obviously wanting to say something else and Harry waited with his heart pounding his thoughts skipping over all the things the man could say. Simon just nodded back in the end though, and continued on, his entourage shooting Harry curious looks as they went by, before getting distracted again by their jobs.

Harry breathed out, if they made it through the results show tonight, he had a feeling the conversation with Simon tomorrow wasn’t going to be any fun.

**1D**

The results show ended sending John Adeleye home, and everyone was back and eating pieces of a huge chocolate cake in celebration of making through another week. The kitchen was loud with most of the contestants crammed in talking loudly and over the top of each other, though Treyc was missing with Rebecca, who was probably comforting the poor girl after she’d been put in the bottom two. Also Louis and Zayn were missing, the two of them having pissed off somewhere else.

Harry sat in the far corner of the table in the kitchen, resting on his elbows and curled over his plate, watching as Niall chatted easily with Matt.

A hand came down on his head, and he looked up to see a Liam. ‘Stop glaring at him.’

‘I’m not glaring,’ Harry said, turning his attention back to his cup.

‘Then stop being surly or whatever you’re doing. You’re making me all stressed.’

Harry shot him a look. ‘You don’t look stressed,’ he accused.

Liam gave him a look that was a bit like a kicked-puppy, but he sat down next to Harry, nudging their shoulders together. ‘It’s going to work out in the end. This is Niall we’re talking about. He could never hold a grudge against you, Harry.’

Harry lowered his voice. ‘Why should he hold a grudge in the first place? I meant it when I said I don’t want him left out.’

‘Yeah, but,’ Liam looked at him helplessly. ‘What do you actually mean by that?’

Harry finished his last piece of cake. Liam was still watching him when he put the fork down.

‘What about Louis, then?’ the other boy eventually asked.

Harry stood up from the table. ‘I don’t know. He’s being an utter prat. He barely spoke two words to me today.’

He left Liam to put his empty plate in the sink and then left the room. He went downstairs with the vague intention of finding wherever Louis had gone and shaking answers out of him.

It was quieter downstairs except for the noise coming from the bean-bag room. It didn’t sound like FIFA or any game Harry knew, but it was loud enough to hear it from the other end of the corridor. He frowned, distinguishing two voices arguing, but as he approached the room went quiet. He reached the doorway and with one glance inside, he could tell something was wrong.

The television screen was off and Zayn, his shoulders all tensed up, was on one side of the room, while Louis was on the other side sitting on the couch, his arms crossed and his legs splayed wide, eyes cutting into Zayn.

‘Is everything okay?’ Harry asked, bewildered.

Zayn spoke like he was gritting his teeth. ‘Yeah. Everything’s cool.’

‘Absolutely peachy,’ Louis said scathingly.

‘I don’t get it,’ Harry said. ‘Are you two fighting or what?’

‘Ask him,’ they both said at the same time, and a second later Zayn was shouldering past Harry out of the room, and Louis was up and striding out the other doorway.

‘Right,’ Harry said to the empty room. He flopped down in the nearest bean-bag to sit by himself for a bit.

**1D**

The next morning nothing had changed.

Niall was still avoiding Harry, Liam was still wearing an expression like a kicked puppy, and Zayn and Louis were still being snippy, giving each other the evil eye and throwing out bitchy side comments for no reason. This morning the house was back it its usual chaos, with everyone up extra early so they could get into the studio and start working on their new song for the week.

Most of the contestants were ready to go, and were mingling by the front door when Harry realised he’d left his phone up in his room. He told Liam that he’d be right back, and left him with Niall as he rushed back up the stairs and down the corridor to their room. He paused when he was almost there though, realising he could once again hear sounds of argument coming through the door.

‘—he said he wanted it like that, so stop being a righteous prick already!’ Louis said.

Zayn replied, ‘Oh, come off it, you tit! If you can’t be responsible about this, and you just go around hurting everybody—’

‘That’s absolute shit. You know I care about you boys.’

‘—but he could barely walk afterwards, and it could have been anyone who walked in on you.’

‘Oh, and I’m so lucky it happened to be you.’

Harry opened the door and almost ran into Louis standing right inside, Zayn standing two feet behind Louis, his hands curled into fists and his eyes dark.

‘Look, what’s going on?’ Harry asked, frowning.

The older boys spared him one angry glance over, and then turned back to each other.  ‘Why won’t you listen to what I’m saying?’

Louis glared. ‘Come on, I know what this is really about.’

‘What’s that then?’ Zayn stepped closer till they were practically nose to nose.

‘Don’t _pretend_.’

‘Fucking twat, I’m asking you, ain’t I?’

‘Quit arguing already!’ Harry tried to cut in.

Louis prodded Zayn in the chest with one hand. ‘This is about you _—_ wanting _this_.’ He hooked his other around Harry’s neck, yanking him in closer.

Louis’ lips smashed into his, kissing him so hard that Harry was forced to lean back under the strength of it. Louis pushed closer, chasing after him and sense memory kicked in, leaving Harry’s stomach swooping low, and his heart-beat rocketing up.

Louis let go of Harry’s neck, turning back to Zayn, breathing harder with a triumphant gleam in his eye. ‘That’s it, isn’t it?’

‘You’re bloody crazy,’ Zayn said lowly.

‘That’s what you want. You walked in on me and Harry, and now you’re being a dick because you want in.’

‘Lou,’ Harry said, numbly.

‘Look at his face, Harry, he can’t even deny it.’ Louis grabbed Harry by his shirt-collar, pulling him stumbling forward until he was right before Zayn. ‘He wants you.’

Zayn watched them, so tense the veins were sticking out all up his arms, but he wasn’t denying anything.

‘Well? Give him a snog, then,’ Louis said, his eyes so intense it was almost scary.

‘Louis,’ Harry tried again.

Louis pulled back, his lips tight and breathing fast as he pushed Harry into Zayn. ‘Just do it.’

Zayn caught Harry’s shoulders, still glaring back at the older boy. ‘I’m not—’

‘You want to, so do it!’ Louis yelled.

‘Fine.’

One of Zayn’s hands left Harry’s shirt to curve, unexpectedly gently, along his jaw to move Harry to face him, and then he was leaning in and kissing him firmly. Harry tried to swallow his surprise, his hands moving up to grip Zayn’s arms and hold him there, as the other boy angled his head to the side and kissed him slow, and a heat burned through Harry’s mouth and melted into him. Zayn broke off briefly, and they both gasped for air before he caught Harry’s bottom lip again and sucked. Harry groaned deep in his throat and opened his mouth again, sinking into Zayn’s smell, his tongue slicking into Zayn’s—

A hand came between them and shoved Zayn back from Harry, and he frowned as the other boy’s lips were jerked away from his, leaving him blinking and half in a daze. In the next second though Louis had stepped in close to him, planting both hands either side of Harry’s face and kissing him fiercely. Harry floundered for a moment, his mind whirling to catch up as his hands landed on Louis’ waist and he gripped him to try and centre himself. Louis pushed closer until their thighs were pressed together, rubbing tightly into Harry, his thumbs rubbing over Harry’s cheeks, as he bit into the kiss.

Harry held on under the onslaught, one of his hands shifting down to grasp Louis’ tightly covered arse, and Louis made a weird noise into Harry’s mouth, his kisses growing stronger. Zayn yanked on Louis’ shoulder, forcing him away, and Harry staggered backwards from the sudden release. Before he even had time to take a proper breath though, Zayn stepped in close to him, pushing him back into the wall and capturing his lips again.

Harry moaned, his body feeling over-sensitised and his hips rolled into the other boy’s jeans, aware of Louis advancing again as Zayn’s hands ran up his sides, thumbs catching over his nipples. Harry writhed up trying to gasp for air, and Zayn’s kisses started to lose finesse as his breathing got uneven. He felt Louis clasp one of Zayn’s hands at his side and pull it away, and Harry opened his eyes just as Louis pushed in. Fingers latched onto Harry’s chin and pulled his head around, and Louis was kissing him again, his other hand bracing himself on the wall behind Harry. He used more tongue this time, making Harry open his mouth wide and powerfully pushing the wet muscles together.

Zayn’s fingers replaced Louis’ and Harry broke off for just a moment of air, before Zayn pulled his head away from Louis so to kiss him again—and Harry couldn’t take it. It was too much, they were both crowding him into the wall and he couldn’t breath, he just couldn’t—

‘Stop,’ he gasped. ‘Stop it.’

He pushed weakly at both of them, but thankfully they stepped back. Harry closed his eyes and just breathed for a second, his head spinning and his lips feeling bruised and his hands trembling. A cut off sound made him open his eyes again. His knees gave out and he slid to the floor at the sight that met him.

Zayn had gripped the sides of Louis’ denim jacket, pulling it up in bunches and forcing Louis to lift to his toes as their lips locked hard. Louis was clutching back at Zayn’s shoulders, scowling into the kiss with his eyes shut tight and mouth furious against Zayn’s.

He bit hard into Zayn’s lip and the other boy made an angry sound of pain, shoving Louis to loose him, and yanking him back in to take control once more. Louis twisted his head away, briefly showing his puffy and red lips before slamming his shoulder into Zayn’s, making him stagger back.

Louis jumped on him, his legs lifting off the ground as he wrapped his arms around Zayn’s neck. Zayn struggled to keep standing, his fingers digging into Louis’ denim jacket, but he stumbled over some clothes left in the middle of the room and tripped backwards.

Harry cried out as Zayn thumped to carpet, worried for half a beat if Zayn was hurt, but then Louis was shifting to straddle Zayn, and Zayn had slid his up inside Louis’ jacket, kissing back twice as hard. Harry pulled his legs out of the way, as the two struggled on the floor for a moment, before Zayn got a proper hold of the older boy’s shirt, using it as leverage to heave up and smack Louis down onto the floor. Louis gasped and surged up again, pulling at Zayn’s shirt as he tried to gain control back, but Zayn fought off the older boy’s hands as he rolled on top of him, pressing their mouths together again.

Harry heaved out a breath as he sat up against the wall, pressure rising inside him until he had to press his hand into the bulge of his pants, watching as Louis bucked his hips. The older boy’s jacket fell open, his shirt riding up above his trousers as he scrabbled at Zayn’s shoulders, who held tight to his position, biting back into Louis’ lips.

‘Fucking—’ Louis lifted his hips off the ground, arching his back as he tried to throw Zayn off.

Zayn released Louis’ mouth and reared back, slamming a hand into Louis’ stomach to shove his hips down and then keeping them there, his hand pressing into the soft skin. Zayn pushed his other arm across Louis’ collar bone, forcing him down to the floor. The air whooshed out of Louis and he was left lying flat out, eyes wide and his throat working against the tanned skin of Zayn’s arm.

Zayn barely gave Louis a chance to gather himself before pressing down again, this time opening his mouth and looking like he was trying to consume Louis whole, his tongue slipping into Louis’ mouth relentlessly. Louis closed his eyes, his hands were white-knuckled where they gripped Zayn’s arms, and his whole body almost shaking as his face flushed.

Zayn pushed his tongue right inside, and Louis trembled with the last of his resistance, and then Harry saw something fold within him. The older boy’s expression changed and his mouth opened up, just letting Zayn inside. Harry choked on a moan, shoving his hand into his pants to grip himself tight as he watched Zayn knead his hand into the soft stomach with Louis letting him, and gasping wetly into the other boy’s mouth.

Zayn kissed him as his other hand moved to tug up Louis’ shirt until it was bunched as far as the denim jacket would let it, revealing a teasing glimpse of Louis’ nipples, and he slid his hand over to find it without looking, rubbing his thumb over the nub and then rolling it. Louis sighed a high sound, shifting weakly as Zayn pressed down on him, and Harry could see how his lower back was trying to lift, his muscles stretching from the stimulation.

Zayn slid his hand from Louis’ stomach to the button on his trousers, unfastening it swiftly and tugging them open. Louis swore and rolled his hips up as Zayn’s fingers pushed inside, and Harry groaned, his head thumping back against the wall as Zayn’s hand came back up with the thick glistening head of Louis’ cock trapped within.

His hand pulling at Louis in a firm strokes, Zayn moved his other hand to grasp Louis’ jaw and turn his head up towards him. The older boy opened his eyes, his pupils blown and Zayn’s mouth came down again, moving strong against his, and his hips bucked up into Zayn’s fist, high gasps escaping him every time Zayn let him breath for a moment.

Louis let go of Zayn’s shoulders with one hand, dropping it to the floor and clawing into the carpet, his jacket constricted his shoulders, his shirt was still bunched up around his armpits, while his trousers slipped down further every time he rolled his hips, his entire torso straining under Zayn.

Zayn’s hand was sliding quicker now and Louis’ hips were moving like he had no control, his hair messed and sweaty as his head tilted back, showing the line of his throat and the thick veins standing out. Zayn leant over him, breathing hard with his dark hair falling forward as his hand worked Louis, eyes fixed on how the older boy’s throat flexed.

Harry pulled at himself desperately as Louis arched up one final time and jerked into Zayn’s strong hand covering it in white.

Louis breathed out a long sigh, his body sinking down to the carpet.

‘Fuck,’ Zayn muttered. ‘Fuck, let me—’

Zayn sat up a bit and pulled his own trousers open, revealing himself to be rock hard in his pants. He leaned back over, stroking himself with Louis all wrecked beneath him, his eyes glazed as he looked up at Zayn, and Zayn cursed again, aiming and groaning as he watched himself shot streaks of white across Louis’ stomach

Harry moved forward from the wall, crawling to Louis’ side. ‘Can I? Lou, can I?’

Harry hovered over Louis’ face, his need and pleasure peaking to almost painful heights as Louis looked at him, his cheeks flushed and his mouth open and wet right there—

‘Fuck—’ Harry bit his lip as he suddenly couldn’t hold on a second more, and released across Louis’ neck and cheek and into his mouth. Louis closed his eyes but didn’t move out of the way.

‘Christ,’ Harry breathed once he’d come down, and his hand shook as he touched Louis’ cheek. ‘Oh, God.’

Louis blinked and looked up at Harry with his pupils still blown, finally closing his mouth and swallowing heavily, not saying anything. Harry leaned forward, his breath loud in the room, and he touched his forehead to the other boy’s.

‘So. Hey,’ Harry said, his voice coming rough.

Louis paused before answering. ‘Hey.’

Harry pulled back and slipped an arm under Louis’ neck, lifting him to sit up more. Louis gripped at the sleeve of Harry’s shirt and he was still breathing heavy. Zayn in front of them had sat back on Louis’ legs, the fight that had possessed him having gone, and something like surprise taking over his features.

‘Is he okay?’ Zayn asked Harry.

‘Uh,’ Harry hesitated; Louis was leaning into his shoulder like he’d fall over if Harry stopped supporting him.

‘I’m woozy. Dunno,’ Louis mumbled, his lips and his bare tummy still splattered with white, and his trousers still trapped half-way off his hips.

Harry bit his lip as he brushed Louis’ sweaty hair away from his eyes. Louis pushed his head against Harry’s chest, and he instinctively curled his arm tighter around him. Harry widened his eyes at Zayn, who was who was still looking shocked like he couldn’t believe he’d done this.

‘Zayn,’ he whispered. ‘Get some towels. We’ll have to leave soon.’

As if on cue, they heard one of the X Factor assistants yelling from the hallway that they wanted everyone ready to leave in five minutes.

‘Shit, I forgot,’ Zayn said, looking down at himself and Louis.

Louis heaved his head of Harry’s chest, blinking again, and he looked a little more normal this time when he met Harry’s gaze. ‘Do you realise,’ he said, ‘that now I’m going to smell like _spunk_ the whole day?’

A surprised bark of laughter escaped Harry, and Zayn joined in a moment later, the tension left the three of them. Despite the fact that they were under-dressed and in a messy pile on the ground— with less than five minutes now to clean up—things felt like they were going to be okay.

 

* * *

 

 

Thanks for reading, I'd love to hear your thoughts! Also, next chapter will be up tomorrow~x  


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Harry’s on tour and he feels on top of the world—until he wakes up one morning to find himself at the first day of the X Factor boot-camp, just sixteen years old again, and absolutely terrified that he’s just lost the last two years of his life.

The  _One Direction_  car ended up being the last one to leave the X Factor house, passing the collection of paparazzi cameras all crowded outside the front gate. Louis and Zayn whispered and jabbed each other in the side, and when Louis laughed he accidently kicked Harry in the leg. Harry didn’t mind though; he couldn’t keep the grin off his face.

Every time he looked over at the older boy he kept envisioning him on the floor of the bedroom, and it was weird that not fifteen minutes later they were dressed and in the car like everything was normal. If not for the still flushed colour in Louis’ cheeks as he slapped Zayn’s chest and laughed at his stupid joke, or the loose satisfied way Zayn was sitting, there wouldn’t have been any way to tell something had happened at all

‘Hey.’ Liam poked Harry in the back of his head to get his attention.

Harry twisted around to face the other boy in the backseat.

‘I’m guessing they sorted their issue out then?’ Liam whispered, pointing discretely at Louis and Zayn still being ridiculous.

‘Um, yeah a bit,’ Harry said, his dimples peeking out.

‘Good,’ Liam gave a relieved sigh, sitting back in his seat.

Harry’s smile faded as he looked past Liam to Niall by the back window. Today, Niall had run some gel up through his hair into a quiff and he had his headphones in, his gaze fixed out the window as he ignored everyone else in car, and some of the lightness in Harry’s chest ebbed away. He sunk back properly into his seat, frowning as he looked out his own window. This couldn’t go on. He had to fix it somehow

**1D**

‘Right,’ Simon said as he folded into his chair at the table. He took some papers out of a yellow envelope, organising them as he talked. ‘Now, I’ve had a very exhausting last couple of days trying to deal with all the press and media attention you boys have attracted with that mob fiasco, and I’ve had to try to organise new security measures and expand our security team on short notice, while also dealing with the results show at the same time. Suffice to say, please refrain from anymore visits to the store, boys.

‘Sorry, Uncle Simon,’ Louis said, leaning on his arms on the table. ‘We don’t mean to make things hard for you.’

‘Yes, I know you don’t.’ Simon set the papers down and pulled off his glasses to rub between his eyes. ‘So, if you could please explain something for me then, that would be great.’

The five boys looked at each other.

‘Like what exactly?’ Zayn asked.

‘What did you mean with the  _Red and Black_  comment a few days ago.’ Simon looked straight at Louis, who went still and Harry’s heart thumped to his throat.

‘Uh,’ Louis’ gaze skittered away. ‘That, uh…’

‘It was just—a dream,’ Liam cut in, his eyes just a little too wide. ‘It was something Louis was talking about earlier, a dream he’d had of us at a  _Red and Black_  concert.’

Simon seemed unimpressed, his tone going dry. ‘Really?

‘Yep,’ Liam nodded. ‘Isn’t that right, lads?’

They all murmured words of agreement, avoiding Simon’s eyes. Zayn placed a hand on Liam’s back and Niall scraped his chair a bit closer, his arm pressing up against Liam’s, who gave him a quick glance filled with thanks.

Simon sighed, putting his glasses back on and frowning at the papers in front of him. ‘Honestly, you boys are the most confusing group I’ve ever met. On the one hand, you’re really friendly with everyone and genuinely nice people, but on the other, you’re so closed off and secretive, it’s—frustrating.’

Harry stared at the man, the hairs on his neck raising and a white noise starting in the back of his mind.

‘Don’t get me wrong, I really do like you boys, I think you’re one of the only contestants we have this year that will make it outside of the show. In a way, you’ve already made it, you’re a sensation on the internet and a media interest. You don’t understand the commotion going on about you out there in the real world, people everywhere are talking about you, but honestly I think part of it is that you five have this… inherent mystery that it feels like no one else can touch. Even looking at you boys now, I have no idea what’s going on in your heads, and that kind of worries me.

‘It’s ridiculous because really you’re just five teenagers, but there’s something different about you from everyone else. I think you know what that thing is, but you’re not going to tell me, are you?’ He picked up one pile of papers and shuffled them. ‘Just think about the path you’re walking down. If you shut people out, then it’s all on you to make the right choices. Anyway, let’s move on, shall we? It’s Halloween week, which is always loads of fun.’

Simon slid the pile of papers down the table to stop in front of them, and Harry looked numbly down at them. Louis slowly reached out to touch the papers, his eyes flicking back to Simon like he thought it might be a trick. The man only lounged back in his seat though, studying them over the steeple of his fingers. Liam exchanged a wary look with Zayn, while Niall kept watching Simon, his mouth in a flat line and his thoughts hidden in his eyes. Simon didn’t say anything else though, and the boys picked out their song quickly to end the uncomfortable tension that seeped through the room.

**1D**

Once they were in the studio room for rehearsal, the grim atmosphere lifted from the boys’ shoulders. They worked hard for nearly two hours, the lyrics returning from their memories and falling naturally into the arrangement Savan wanted. Towards the end of their session, it was easy to tell the man was pleased with how they were sounding, and he declared they should take a short break and come back to try it again without the lyrics in front of them.

Louis snatched the lyrics sheet from Harry’s hand. ‘None of this anymore, lad!’ he said, screwing the sheet into a crumpled ball. He snatched at Harry’s waistband, and shoved the crumpled paper down the front of Harry’s pants. Liam high-fived Louis through his laughter as Harry took the ball of paper out of his trousers and threw it at Louis’ head. Savan rolled his eyes at them, hiding his smile with his water bottle. The door opened and two security guards came in, scanning the room.

‘Can I help you, gentlemen?’ Savan called.

The guard with the shaved head replied, ‘Sorry to interrupt, we’re just checking everything’s okay. It’s part of the new protocol.’

Savan frowned. ‘Oh, yes. With all the people trying to get in from outside, right? Hang on boys,’ he said to the five of them. ‘Let me talk to these men for a minute.’ He went over to the security guards to speak in low tones with them.  

‘I’m goin’ to the loo,’ Niall said, not waiting for a response as he walked away. Harry watched him slip out, his good mood draining and he couldn’t stand this a moment longer. Liam, Louis and Zayn were distracted, absorbed with making silly voices and trying to give each other dead arms, and Harry slunk from the room without anyone questioning him. He went up the corridor and round the corner.

‘Niall!’ He ran up the hall after the other boy, sweeping his hair out of his eyes as he got close. ‘Niall.’

The blonde boy turned to regard him, his blue eyes cool and distant.

‘Please, I need to talk to you. Properly.’

‘Fine.’ Niall looked away, sliding his hands into his pockets. He stepped to the side into a small bare studio, leaning against a table there. ‘What’s up?’

‘Niall,’ Harry sighed, coming up close to him and moving to touch his shoulder.

Niall pulled back, twisting, and something of Harry’s hurt must have shown on his face because a moment later, the small amount of hostility faded from Niall’s eyes. ‘Alright, I’m listening,’ he mumbled.

Uncertain if Niall would flinch back from him again, Harry reached for Niall’s chin and turned his face up so that he had no choice but to look him straight in the eye. Harry took a deep breath, searching for the words and finally giving up and saying honestly, ‘You know I care about you. And I’m sorry that your feelings were hurt.’

Niall’s lips pressed together, and for a second Harry thought he would pull away again, before he nodded and his hands came out of his pockets as he curled forward to take him up in a hug.

Harry hugged back, fierce relief shooting through him and when he next spoke his voice had gone gravely. ‘And about the other day, it wasn’t out of pity, okay? I  _promise_ you.’ He lifted his head from Niall’s neck again.

‘Yeah, okay,’ Niall said. ‘I believe you.’

Harry smiled crookedly, doubtful for a moment that the blonde boy was just saying that to placate him. He shook away the notion since Niall was nothing but candid with everything he did, sliding his hand under Niall’s arm, and spreading automatically over the small of the other boy’s back, feeling the muscles shift as Niall’s chest expanded on a breath. His eyes fell to Niall’s lips.

‘Harry? Niall? Are you boys around here somewhere?’

Harry let go, stepping back hurriedly as a lady came past the open door, scowling when she saw them standing in the bare studio.

‘What are you doing? You can’t just disappear and not tell anyone where you’re going. We have a schedule to stick to and the way security is, we can’t have people wandering about willy-nilly, and I don’t have time to be chasing you around.’

‘Sorry, Linda,’ Harry intoned following after the assistant manager. He cupped his hand around the back of Niall’s head, grinning as he pulled the other boy through the door.

Zayn saw them first as they re-entered the main studio room, looking up from where he, Liam and Louis were talking by the piano. ‘Vas happing?’ he called, and the other two turned around. Savan huffed at them, stepping aside to speak with Linda for a second.

‘You trouble makers,’ Liam said as they came over.

‘Off having adventures without me? How very dare you,’ Louis added.

Niall laughed at that and all three boy’s eyebrows went up at the same time. Louis leapt forward, stealing the Irish lad away from Harry as he hooked an arm around Niall’s neck and patted his chest. ‘All right, Nialler?’

‘Yeah, yeah.’ Niall smiled back. ‘I’m good.’

‘Excellent, because I was thinking of starting a protest for an early lunch break. I’m absolutely famished today, and I’m a growing man.’

‘Now we know that’s not true,’ Liam said, and ducked away when Louis went to slap him in the head.

Zayn touched Harry’s elbow and beamed, before surprising Harry by darting forward and planting a hard kiss to his temple.

Harry blinked, looking over his shoulder in case at the camera crew, and his stomach clenched inwards to see that the lens was trained on the band. He tried to clam himself down, telling himself it was nothing Zayn hadn’t done a hundred times before, but he still couldn’t help the worry niggling in the back of his mind that it was obvious something was changing between them.

**1D**

Their concentration grew steadily worse over the next hour, both Louis and Zayn acting the silliest Harry had seen them do in a while, and it was easy to get swept up in their high. If their vocal coach had been anyone else but Savan, Harry was sure they would’ve been screamed at by now.

‘Seriously, what is with you boys today?’ The man said, watching Liam spin around with Louis clutching onto his back, while Zayn threw bits of sheet paper at Louis’ head and Niall laughed so hard he had to hold his stomach. ‘Did someone give you a whole crate of Red Bull and didn’t tell me?’

‘We’re just excited to learn new vocal exercises,’ Harry said with a winning smiling, and Louis and Liam broke into a series of wailing and siren noises.

‘All right!’ Savan covered his ears. ‘Enough, I give up. Go have a break and work off some of that energy or something.’

They all cheered. Liam stopped spinning, staggering to the side before falling and sending Louis sprawling over the floor.

‘I consider this protest—a success!’ Louis announced.

Niall pointed out. ‘You know, this lunch break isn’t earlier than yesterdays.’

‘It’s the thought that counts though,’ the older boy said, grabbing the hand Zayn offered and getting hauled up. Louis paused as he get his feet back under him, eyes going unsure as Zayn looked at him without letting go of his hand. He licked his lips, gaze skittering away and a wicked twist took over Zayn’s mouth. He let go of Louis’ hand to brush his thumb briefly over the older boy’s bicep in the smallest touch.

Louis’ lips parted on a intake of breath. ‘Uh,’ he stuttered out, moving quickly out of the reach of the Bradford boy. ‘Shall we, then?’

Zayn watched him go with a shark grin, before he turned to grab his drink bottle and moving forward out the door with Niall.

‘Come on,’ Harry said to Liam, who was standing where he’d picked himself up, looking lost in thought as he stared at the doorway the others had disappeared out of. ‘Liam?’

‘Oh, yeah.’ Liam seemed to shake himself out of it. ‘Sure. Let’s go.’

**1D**

Lunch wasn’t any better than rehearsal, with Louis refusing to stay still for more a second, and Zayn and Liam weren’t helping by throwing bits of food at each other, while Niall loudly tried to hoard his own from the thieving fingers. Only when a stray shot of chips accidently hit Katie instead of Zayn’s quiff did they settle and start eating the food on their plates.

Harry pushed his chair back and left the table to get a drink from the refreshments table, coming up next to a glum looking Paije as he poured himself a cup of juice.

‘All right, Paije?’

The boy’s eyes glanced to meet his before flicking away again. ‘Yeah. Sure, just stressing I guess. You know, it’s getting down in the numbers isn’t it?’

‘You’ll be fine, mate. You’re a good singer.’

‘Well, I have to be, don’t I? We can’t all be—’ He made a circular motion in Harry’s direction.

Harry frowned. ‘Can’t all be what?’

‘You know. It’s more smooth sailing when you’re in a pretty boy-band, isn’t it? You guys just have to stand on stage and smile, and the fans fall at your feet.’

Harry stared at him, all the words he could say to that building up inside of him. He took his cup of juice and turned his back instead, walking back to the boys table, only realising then how much of a wide berth the rest of the contestants were giving their table, of course that could just be because they’d been throwing food around but still…

He sat back down between Niall and Liam, looking across the table blankly. Zayn was reaching over and fixing the lie of Louis’ loose collar, the older boy’s hand curling against the wood of the table when Zayn’s fingers lingered on his neck. Nobody else here but the four boys in front of him understood what it was like to do day after day of thirteen hour rehearsals, with interviews piled on before and after, to perform to thousands of people and then fly to a new city that night instead of sleeping

An arm settled around his shoulders and Harry turned to meet Niall’s soft gaze. ‘Alrigh’ there?’

Harry nodded. ‘Yeah.’

‘Listen, sorry I’ve been a poo-head the last few days.’

‘You had every right.’

‘Yeah, well I’m sorry all the same.’

Harry smiled crookedly, huddling closer as his eyes fell again to Niall’s pinked lips. ‘Thanks, man,’ he said instead, trying to hide how his voice had gone a little choked.

Niall grinned back, shaking Harry’s shoulder before letting go and returning to his meal.

The boys were the last to finish, having messed around so long before starting, and finally an assistant came and asked them to hurry up so they could get back to the studio, and the boys obediently did as she bid.

‘Harry.’ Louis stopped him as Harry went to leave. ‘You left your phone on the coffee table.’ Louis brushed right up close to Harry, a pretence of innocence in his eyes as he stretched up slightly on his tiptoes to deliberately bring their lips nearly touching. He grinned bright and slipped by, trailing his fingers over Harry’s torso as he went. Harry released the air stuck in his lungs, turning to watch the smaller boy catch up to Liam and reach an arm over his neck, making Liam startle from his quiet pondering of his shoes.

Harry held in the groan that wanted to escape and loped back to the couch for his phone—which he couldn’t see anywhere. ‘Hey, was my phone over here?’ he asked Niall, who was putting all the empty plates and bowls back onto the tray to make it easier for the cafeteria staff.

‘Hmm? Oh yeah, buddy. Louis took it.’

Harry raised his eyes to the ceiling. ‘Right.’

**1D**

They were released from the studio earlier than usual that afternoon, and they bundled together in the car feeling the brisk chill to the air that hinted at the coming November. Louis called dibs on the shower as soon as they were through the door, and when Harry sniggered as he followed the older boy up the stairs, causing Louis to half-turn and poke his tongue out.

‘Well, can I go in first, I gotta pee,’ Niall said behind them.

‘No way, I’ve been desperate for a shower since this morning. I stink, and I absolutely refuse to wait any longer.’

‘Then I’m coming in with yeh.’

‘Fine, but no taking pictures of my bum, you hear me? I don’t care how sexy it is.’

Niall guffawed pushing at Louis to go down the corridor.

‘Hey, can a talk to you a minute,’ Liam asked Zayn from the bottom of the stairs, pulling at his shirt to stop him.

‘Yeah, what’s up?’

Harry left them, continuing on into the kitchen where he could smell a roast lamb cooking. He was shooed away from the oven when he got in the way, and was told dinner wouldn’t be too far away and to come back then. Deciding to go call his Mum instead, Harry moved back through the corridor, pausing as he saw Liam and Zayn were still on the lower floor, almost out of sight below the stairs

‘You  _what?’_  Harry heard Liam say, his voice gone high.

‘Keep it down, will you?’ Zayn replied, exasperated and Harry edged to the side, the pinched confusion on Liam’s face coming into view.

‘With Louis  _and_ Harry? At the same time?’

‘Shut up, already, it wasn’t a big deal.’

‘But I don’t understand.’ Liam covered his face. ‘I just thought—don’t you like me?’

‘What? Come on, of course I do.’

‘You like them more though,’ Liam said, muffled

‘No.’ Zayn pulled Liam’s hands away from his face, trying to look him in the eye.  ‘That’s not fair. You know I love you all the same. What happened this morning, it just—’

‘Meant nothing?’

Harry stomach clenched weirdly.

‘Uh, not really. I don’t know what it was about them, I couldn’t think properly, you know? Liam, if you’d seen what Louis looked like—’

‘I’ve seen him jerking off before. It’s not exactly a new thing,’ Liam said as pink bloomed across his cheeks and down his neck.

‘No, not like this.’ Zayn’s voice was getting rougher. ‘Not with Harry watching and just looking like— _fuck_. Just the way he kneeled over Louis’ face, I wish you’d seen it. Fucking amazing, man.’

‘…Yeah?’

A bang came from the back door downstairs, startling Harry.

‘—can’t wait to put my poor aching feet up.’ Mary’s voice floated from the back hall, getting louder as she entered with Rebecca.

Zayn and Liam stepped apart, and Zayn patted the other boy on the shoulder before they started up the stairs, Liam looking lost in thought again, his cheeks still pink. Harry moved away quickly, disappearing down the corridor before they realised he’d been there, a strange thrill running through his blood.

 

* * *

 

Thank you so much! My other story is coming along well, I can't wait to start posting it, but it's not quite ready for that yet. 

Please tell me what you thought either here or on my [tumblr](http://louis-cuddle.tumblr.com/), there'll be more soon.X  


	13. Chapter 13

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Harry’s on tour and he feels on top of the world—until he wakes up one morning to find himself at the first day of the X Factor boot-camp, just sixteen years old again, and absolutely terrified that he’s just lost the last two years of his life.

They found out they were having dinner early that night because all the contestants were being taken down to the _London Dungeons_  for Halloween, an underground ghost house that Harry vaguely remembered going to last time. The rooms were all filled with white smoke from a machine, angled lights on mirrors and sticky cobwebs that coated the walls. The costumes and actors were amazingly realistic, making Harry shout and the other boys laugh, and when a tiny zombie girl appeared from what they thought was a mirror, they all shrieked and tripped into each other. The excursion seemed to finish up too soon for the boys, but the crew were making eager sounds of heading home so they found themselves being rounded up and asked once, nicely, to stop running around. Then they were asked again, less nicely, as Louis stole Zayn’s hat and rushed ahead with it.

‘There’s a what?’ The assistant, Jane, said next to Harry, holding her ear piece and scowling. ‘Right now? You’re joking. No, we can’t do that, we’re just about to bring them up. Boys _please_! I’m serious, cut it out.’

Harry stumbled into Liam as Zayn bashed into him, trying to get by and get at Louis, spinning his hat on his finger.

‘Yes, sir. I mean ma’am, sir,’ Louis said, dashing away again with a laugh as Zayn got close.

‘Bloody kid.’ Jane touched her microphone to her lips, speaking clearly and loudly. ‘Look, Tony, get the men to come around from the front to help, and I’ll—just do it quickly then, I don’t care how!’

Liam bumped Harry forward with his shoulder, making him nearly smack into the door frame as they got to the narrow entrance hall. Niall followed behind, keeping himself out of the way as Louis and Zayn dashed around him and the other contestants. They went out the door into the cold night air—a blast of screams greeting them. Harry let go of Liam’s neck and stared at the all the people outside the  _Dungeons_ , crowding up the pavement before the black X Factor cars. They were all wrapped up in scarfs and thick jackets, cheering as the X Factor stars emerged up the stairs from the underground entrance, most of them younger girls with their parents, though a few camera crews were trying to push their way to the front to get a shot.

‘Oh, shii…’ Louis trailed his swear off as he saw all the young fans around them.

‘How did they find us?’ Niall frowned.

‘They know the  _future_ ,’ Zayn said, drawing the word out in a ghostly voice.

‘No, that’s us remember?’

‘ _Louis,_ ’ Liam cried.

Harry dug his elbow into the eldest boy’s side, smiling at the cameras.

‘Okay everyone,’ one of the X Factor staff called to the whole group of contestants. ‘This was unexpected, but we’ll get it sorted out quickly. Just please try to be calm and reasonable—’ the rest of the man’s words were drowned out by burst of screams when Niall winked at a little girl.

‘Harry! Harry, please will you sign this for me?’

‘Zayn! Give me a picture! Zayn, over here!’

They moved out towards the crowd, going along the lines taking pens and signing whatever was put in front of them, and pausing every few seconds when a camera phone was waved in their faces. Cars were still going past along the road, splashing puddles from the street on people’s legs near the back, but they didn’t seem to care, only pressing forward closer, trying to get to the contestants as they spread out. Harry found himself surrounded, having signed several autographs in a row and now near the front of the car. People pressed closer, each trying to be the next to get him to sign and he stumbled back as two girls pushed each other, before steadying himself on the bonnet of the car. A man’s hand fell on his shoulder and he looked around to see one of the security team trying to guide him away from the people, trying to pull him from the crowded pavement to the clear space in front of the parked car.

‘Okay folks, that’s enough now,’ the man spoke loudly, but the girls around them were yelling Harry’s name and he didn’t think they could hear the man.

He signed two more copies of his face that looked like from a magazine article, and tried to step back from the girls, looking over their heads for the other members of his band. He saw Louis smiling for a photo several feet away, with about twenty people crowded in the space between them. The other security guards were also shouting for people to back away. The X Factor staff were trying to get the contestants into their cars, and the group around Harry surged forward as they realised their time was being cut short.

‘Harry, please I need to get his autograph! Harry!’

‘Back off,’ the guard barked, spreading his arms wide to block them as they surged forward. ‘Stay on the curb! Do you hear me?’

The girls cried their objections, and the babble of voices and different people shouting meshed in to this harsh blanket of sound that turned everything into a confused rush. No matter how many times Harry experienced this in his life, it never got easier to sort out, and he usually ended up just going with the flow of wherever he was being pushed by security members

‘Hey! I said get back on the curb! Where are your parents? Oi!’

The guard tired to stop the girls circling round him off the curb, each of them reaching for Harry like it might be the only time they would see him. Two girls managed to grab his wrist, and pulled him forward, nearly making him loose his balance again. Someone stepped on his shoe, trapping it and a third pair of fingers yanked at the band on his wrist as he tried to pull his arm back.

‘Hey, wait,’ he protested, trying to shield his bracelet. ‘Wait, that’s mine.’

He looked around for help, and he caught Louis’ face over the heads of the girls, a frown forming on the older boy’s face.

‘Oi!’ The guard bellowed, cutting in front of Harry. ‘ _Back off!_ ’

The girls all let go in surprise and Harry suddenly got his arm back, stumbling backwards—only his foot was still trapped beneath someone else’s and he tripped backwards instead, arms whirling to catch himself and his elbow hitting the bitumen hard. A terrible long sound wrecked Harry’s ear-drums and his eyes were blinded by a twin pair of headlights, brakes squealing as the oncoming car screeched to a halt, and Harry watched the tires stop right in front of his face. Screams exploded around him a split second later, but Harry could barely hear them from how his ears were ringing. He stared at the tire in front of his face, the smell of burnt rubber rich in his every heaving breath, and there were lots of men shouting behind him now and over it one familiar voice he picked out.

‘Harry!  _Harry_.’

He shoved himself up, a meaty hand grasping the back of his shirt and helping to haul him to his feet, and Harry briefly registered the security guard’s wide eyes, before his gaze fell on Louis behind him. He had a flash of how pale the older boy’s face had gone, before Louis was on him, arms wrapping right around him and squeezing, Louis swearing into his neck.

‘I couldn’t see what happened, fuck. I thought—are you okay?’

‘M’fine,’ Harry mumbled, but he didn’t know if the other boy heard him

More people were shouting now, the guards having increased in number and all sounding angry as they moved the crowd back. Cameras were flashing, and the lights and colours were melding together in Harry’s eyes, his mind replying the surge of the car’s headlights as someone pushed him and Louis back to the pavement.

‘Harry!’

‘What happened?’

‘Is he alrigh’?’

Zayn, Niall and Liam were suddenly in front of him, touching his face and shoulders and pulling him into a tight hug with all of them. Harry focused on their faces, feeling like that was all he could manage, and there were more camera flashes and shouting and he could just imagine the headlines being made up right now. Harry shook his head to clear it, but the fans were still screaming, the noise pressing in on his ears. They sounded crazy.

 ‘Yeah, I’m fine. Nothing happened, I’m good,’ Harry said slowly. The other boys shifted around him, forming a wall of shoulders that blocked most of the cameras from getting a shot, Zayn frowning and Liam exchanging a look with Louis.

‘Jesus,’ Niall said. ‘Can we get back now?’

‘Yeah, lets.’ Harry nodded, folding weakly under the push of Zayn’s hand towards the car door. The noise went up another decibel as people saw they were leaving, and security had to form a semi-circle around them, to hold off the crowd pressing forward. Harry turned from the blinding flashing of the cameras and crawled inside the dark safety of the car, nearly getting crushed beneath the weight of Louis and Liam’s bodies, with Niall complaining of Liam’s hard elbow in his ear while Zayn shut the door behind them all, muffling the noise and clamour outside.

**1D**

It was getting late that night and everything had wound down. Zayn was listening to his headphones in his bed, and above him on the top bunk Niall was strumming his guitar idly, occasionally delving into various riffs, and Liam was tapping at the keys of his laptop from his own single bed. Harry had wedged himself next to Louis and the wall on the lower bunk, and was drifting comfortably from thought to thought, naked except for the blanket. Next to him, Louis was propped up on the pillows, texting his Mum. Harry quietly watched how the light from the screen fell on the older boy’s features for a few minutes, before he couldn’t help himself and he reached up to tug on Louis’ shirt.

Louis looked over and quirked an eyebrow at him, and Harry smiled in return, tugging more firmly on his shirt. Louis’ eyes lit up as he understood, throwing his phone off to the side before rolling over him, and Harry couldn’t help the dimples that stuck in his cheeks at how easily Louis had switched his attention.

Louis pressed him thumb into the impish dent. ‘You think you’re so irresistible,’ he murmured.

‘Yep, pretty much.’

‘You’d be right then,’ Louis said, closing the short distance between them.

Louis kissed him soft and lazy, like they could do this forever and Harry felt like he was sinking into the mattress. Louis pulled back an inch to breathe, sliding his hand across the pillow to stroke through Harry’s hair, pushing it back from his forehead, before he was leaning in again. Harry kept his eyes closed, letting himself get lost in the slow rhythm and motion of their lips. He pushed a hand up the back on Louis’ shirt to skim the warm skin beneath. Louis shifted his weight, leaning more comfortable on Harry’s hips.

Liam cleared his throat, and Harry broke off as he realised Niall’s guitar had stopped playing and the other boys were all looking at them.

‘Uh, right.’ Liam said. ‘Is this going to be a regular thing then?’

‘Yeah, I reckon so,’ Louis said, raising his eyebrows with a smile.

Liam nodded. ‘Right, okay,’ he said, and stared again as Harry leant up to nose at the underside of Louis’ jaw, feeling the light stubble there scratch his cheek.

‘Why?’ Louis asked, his hand curling into the sheets at Harry’s attention. ‘You’re okay with it, aren’t you?’

‘Yeah, of course, yeah.’ Liam said. ‘It’s just a bit different to see, I guess.’

A pillow walloped Louis in the head. ‘Don’t go making Liam uncomfortable,’ Zayn said.

‘Excuse me.’ Louis picked up the offending pillow and hurled it back up to the other bunk. ‘I was not.’

Zayn caught it, sliding off his bunk to the ground and in the next moment, Louis was hauled off Harry’s lap.

‘Hey,’ Harry said, and was ignored as the two boys started grappling and laughing, trying to whack the pillow in the other’s face. Harry groaned and rolled to sit up, glancing back at Liam frowning at his hands in his lap. Harry considered him for a moment, before getting up and flopping down next to the other boy.

‘It’s really okay, you know,’ he said, nudging his shoulder.

Liam spared him a look, his gaze flitted down Harry’s bare legs. ‘I know. I’m fine with it, I am. It’s just different, that you and Louis are going to be thing now.’

‘Not just us.’ Harry frowned.

Liam’s mouth opened and he looked towards Zayn, who’d tackled Louis onto Niall’s bed, and the Irish lad was complaining loudly, trying to protect his guitar from their wild swings with the pillows. Liam shook his head. ‘I don’t understand what’s going on here.’

‘What do you mean?’

Niall got up from the bed and placed his guitar against the wall. Louis grabbed him from behind, causing both of them to fall over as he clutched Niall to his chest, yelling at Zayn, ‘You can’t get me, I’ve got a Niall! You’re not allowed to touch me.’

‘That’s cheating, man,’ Zayn said, pointing a warning finger from the bed.

‘The way everyone’s acting,’ Liam said. ‘It’s just so confusing and it’s like none of you care.’

‘Oi,’ Harry said, taking Liam’s hand. ‘I care.’

‘I know you do, that’s not what I meant.’ Liam huffed, and the bed bounced as he shifted to take Harry’s hand properly. ‘I just don’t think you realise what you’re doing.’

'I know what I'm feeling though,' Harry said. Making a split decision, he pushed himself up and caught Liam in an open-mouthed kiss, stealing Liam’s noise of surprise. The other boy’s hands came up to grasp Harry’s waist and a thrill ran up Harry’s spine, though Liam’s mouth was mostly slack at first, barely returning the kiss like he wasn’t quite sure this was happening, but as and Harry pressed down harder, he grew firmer and his thumbs pressed harder into the skin of Harry’s stomach.

‘Ooh, Li-am,’ Zayn called, laughing.

‘Harry, you absolute  _slut_ ,’ Louis said.

The pulled apart; Liam’s neck and ears had gone red and his hands were now holding Harry’s waist like he wasn’t sure where to put him. Harry looked over his shoulder at the other three, trying to judge their reactions.

‘Whatever, I don’t need you anyway,’ Louis said, hugging the boy in his arms closer. ‘I’ve got a Niall now.’

‘This is exactly what I’m talking about,’ Liam burst out. ‘You shouldn’t be able to just do that, and for it to be okay with everyone, except it obviously is okay. I don’t understand, because this basically feels like we’re all  _together_  which is completely…’ Liam trailed off as the room went quiet, everyone looking at each other.

Harry shrugged one shoulder awkwardly. ‘I think we’ve probably been something like that for a while, it’s only now that things are actually getting physical.’

‘Neglect,’ Louis interrupted.

Harry smiled at him. ‘Okay, some of it has been physical already, but I meant with all of us. It just, feels good, doesn’t it? When it’s just the five of us, like right now, I know I wouldn’t want to be anywhere else.’

‘Yeah, I feel exactly the same,’ Zayn said.

‘Yup, me too,’ Niall said, leaning comfortably against Louis now that the older boy had stopped squeezing him.

‘I’d have to agree, actually.’ Louis nodded.

‘Liam?’ Harry asked quietly, when the boy only frowned.

‘Look, I—I’m the same too, but I just don’t see how it could ever work. If someone found out, or if we started this thing and it turned out it wasn’t what everyone wanted, or what we’d thought it would be—’

‘Liam, stop,’ Harry laughed, pressing his hand to the boy’s mouth to halt the words. ‘You worry too much, mate.’

‘Yeah, I think you need to chill,’ Zayn said, his voice suddenly much closer, and a moment later his arm wrapped around Harry’s neck. Zayn pulled, strangling him as he was forced to lean backwards away from Liam. Harry’s hands flew up to pat weakly at the boy’s forearm, and yelled as he was pulled off the bed and sent crashing to the carpet. Harry coughed as the air entered his lungs roughly, but before he could catch his breath entirely Zayn was leaning over him and mouthing a hot line up Harry’s throat. He choked on a moan, his hips bucking up involuntarily and Zayn pressed down on them, preventing them from moving again

Liam protested faintly, ‘Uh, I think that was mine actually.’

Zayn laughed into Harry’s neck, and he pulled off to grin over his shoulder. ‘Too late. You should have appreciated what you had.’

‘Jerk,’ Liam said, crossing his arms. His face was still pink.

Zayn’s grip softened on Harry’s hip as he looked at Liam, and he sat back a bit. ‘Come here, babes.’

Liam slid forward, halting before the edge of the bed and brushing his hands against his sweat-pants, before finally getting up and coming over to stand between Zayn and Louis on the ground. Zayn reached up and tugged Liam down to his level, smiling through the kiss he gave him.

‘Can I?’ Harry heard Louis asked on the floor next to him.

‘Yeah, alright,’ Niall answered.

Harry turned to see what they were talking about. He stared at Louis holding himself up over Niall, before pressing down and kissing him. Both their eyes closed and Niall reached up to hold onto the older boy’s arms, his neck arching back and Niall made a cut-off sound as Louis shifted to run a hand down the blonde boy’s slim torso.

Zayn pushed too close to Liam, making him overbalance into Louis, who broke off from Niall. ‘Watch it, Payne,’ he said, grinning.

‘Sorry,’ Liam said, disbelief clear in his tone. Louis sat up to hook an arm around Liam’s shoulders, pressing their foreheads together, both of them giving breathless, giddy laughs.

Harry twisted on the ground reaching around for Niall lying next to him, and wriggling close to grab his collar and reel him in. Niall came easily, a returning arm coming around Harry’s chest as he kissed back. His hand wandered down over Niall’s stomach, dipping below Niall’s waistband without hesitation.

‘Oh, fuck.’ Harry heard Louis’ voice crack, but didn’t turn to look.

Niall pressed his lips together, the muscle in his jaw jumping as he kept any sound from escaping as Harry took the boy’s cock in hand. Harry rolled closer, dipping his hand right to the base and circling it completely, his lids lowering as he watched the struggle playing out on Niall’s face, watching how the boy’s eyelashes fanned across his cheeks. He moved his hand faster, biting at Niall’s bottom lip and the smallest sound broke free from the boy’s throat. He nipped at Niall’s mouth, but he only gasped soundlessly, clutching at Harry’s side as he clenched his eyes tight.

Liam and Zayn hadn’t seemed to have noticed, and Harry felt Zayn leave his legs and heard Liam breathe the boy’s name, and a thumping sound off to the side, but his attention was taken by Niall again as he began to get close.

‘Come on, Niall,’ Harry whispered, squeezing his hand tighter around him.

Niall bent back, his open mouth bumping up against Harry’s jaw and his hot breath puffing out in short bursts, before he ducked his head down, curling into Harry’s collar-bone and clutching at him as his hips jerked up in Harry’s hand. He worked him through it, kissing the top of Niall’s head as he came down and went lax on the carpet.

‘Harry,’ Louis sounded desperate now as Harry pulled back and rolled onto his back again, his hand coming down naturally across his belly to skim over the hard length of himself curving up his stomach. ‘Fucking—’

Louis whipped his own hand out from where it had been working in his own pants, his eyes dark and his hair still a mess as he slid forward on his knees, and batted away Harry’s hand from himself, replacing it with his own. Louis’ trousers had slipped down his thighs to crumple about his knees, leaving him just a long line of toned flesh and Harry couldn’t tear his eyes away from the delicious curve of his thighs and hips, but then Louis splayed on hand on Harry’s chest and folded over, moving Harry’s cock right to his lips and all thoughts and breath left Harry in a white flash of pleasure.

‘God.  _Louis_ ,’ he moaned as the older boy took him right down. Harry moved his fingers into the light, soft hair of the boy feeling his head bob down and up and watched in half-agony as his length disappeared into the his slick, pretty mouth. ‘Fuck. Oh,  _fuck_.’

He must have caught Zayn’s attention because in the next moment, he heard a laugh and then a slap of flesh, and Louis jerked against Harry, his eyes going wide from the unexpected spank, and he pulled off Harry with a slurp. ‘Oi, rude,’ Louis said.

Zayn barked another laugh, his nose and eyes crinkling as he clenched the older boy’s arse and pushed—and Louis squawked as his face-planted Harry’s stomach. ‘Hey, Liam. Get your lube out, will you?’ Zayn gestured at Liam’s rumpled bag in the corner.

‘What?’ Liam yelped. ‘No way.’

Zayn picked up a stray shoe and threw it at the other boy. ‘Come on, man, just get it.’

Blushing to the roots of his hair, Liam hesitated a moment longer, but when no one else said anything, he turned to his bag and rooted through the corner pocket and returning to Zayn’s side.

Harry heard the cap being opened, and his breathing was speeding up rapidly as he wondered if Zayn was really going to do this. Zayn planted on hand on the tanned slope of Louis’ back, his gaze focused on his other hand out of Harry’s sight.

‘Wait, is this really okay, Lou?’ Liam fretted. ‘I mean, this is kind of—’

Harry couldn’t see, but he could tell when Zayn’s fingers entered the older boy, as Louis’ mouth went slack and a shudder went arching up through his body, his hands searching for a grip on Harry’s skin and the carpet. Zayn caught Harry’s eye, a strand of his dark hair having fallen into his eyes, and a hint of a smirk in the way that his mouth parted, just before the muscles bunched in his arm and he pushed his fingers forward into Louis again. Harry grabbed at Louis shoulders, catching him as the older boy was shoved forward with a sob of pleasure. Zayn’s shoulder rolled as he worked his fingers deeper, purposefully making Louis’ whole body rock with the motion, pushing out more sounds from Louis’ lips as the boy curled over Harry’s forgotten cock.

‘Louis, come on, please,’ Harry begged, tugging lightly on his hair.

‘Uh, I, yeah,’ Louis managed. His arms tremulous from attempting to hold himself up, he shifted himself feebly down again, his body still pitching with Zayn’s movements. Louis spread his knees a bit wider, frowning as he concentrated on keeping his hips still by flexing backwards whenever Zayn went to push down.

‘Ah, fuck,’ Zayn muttered.

Louis carefully took Harry in hand, his eyes fluttering shut as his breath hitched on a moan—but his hand didn’t move. Harry clenched his fingers into the older boy’s hair as Louis rested his mouth against him, mindlessly mumbling Harry’s name into the thick of his cock. Zayn had lost his smirk now, something like trepidation climbing across his features as no matter how hard he shoved his fingers down, Louis rolled his hips with the thrust, taking it easily.

‘Liam.’ Zayn said suddenly. ‘Liam, hold him, I gotta—’

‘What now?’ Liam’s throat sounded coarse.

‘Just come here, yeah? Fuck, I’ve gotta—’ Zayn pulled away and Louis made a high sound of protest that travelled right though Harry before he pulled off.

‘No, wait,’ Louis said, his thighs clenching on empty air and nearly falling over. Liam caught him, gripping Louis’ side and looking completely out of his depth. Zayn sat off to the side, yanking down his sweatpants and leaning against the bed as he jerked himself harshly, looking like sin itself as he pulled himself off. It drove Harry mad just watching him.

‘Louis,’ Harry said, so close to the edge now that he might actually lose his mind if the older boy didn’t take him back in.

‘I know, I just.’ Louis gasped. ‘Can I?’

‘ _Yes._ Whatever it is, yes.’

Louis sat up and moved forward. ‘Liam, get my trousers,’ he said, and kicking the sweats off his feet and Liam hurried to throw them out of the way, his eyes still too wide. Louis straddled Harry, his thick thighs spreading either side of his hips, as he reached behind himself to grasp Harry’s length. Harry clasped onto Louis’ knees tightly, his mouth falling open as Louis guided him between the slicked up muscles of his cheeks. The older boy’s face was flushed and he was rushing, and nearly overbalanced again before Liam caught him once more, watching him with huge brown eyes and leaving his hand on Louis’ side to steady him as Harry’s tip slipped inside.

‘Oh, God,’ Harry’s eyes rolled back into his head at the fluttering, wet warmth taking in his cock.

‘ _Ow-ow._ ’ Louis stopped, his face scrunching up and going tight.

‘Baby,’ Harry said.

Louis whacked him in the gut and Harry made a winded sound, mouth gaping for air like a fish. Liam smoothed a hand over Louis’ side comfortingly, his other hand pressing gently on Louis’ hip, trying to ease him through it. After what seemed an age, Louis rested on Harry’s legs again, his chest heaving and pink with effort and he leant back against Liam for support. ‘You’re fucking big,’ Louis accused him.

‘I—’ Harry squeezed his eyes shut, feeling the tight heat of muscle fluttering around him. ‘Louis, Louis.’

‘All right, you can move.’

Harry gripped the other boy’s hips and pushed up, Louis bouncing up on a quick intake of breath and coming down so firmly and amazing Harry that it was whiting his vision and singing in his ears. He moved into Louis again and again, and he see when he opened his eyes that Liam was still hovering by their sides, a hand still placed on Louis’ back as the older boy rolled his hips down on Harry, face tensing and going loose as he went. Harry’s muscles strained, going red as he gave over to the overwhelming feeling, pulsing up and holding Louis strong against him as he came inside the older boy.

‘What—Harry!’ His nipple was caught and twisted viciously. ‘Oh my God, you’re such a fucking teenager.’

‘Sorry, sorry,’ Harry gasped, coming down and feeling himself softening. ‘Get Liam to help you.’

‘Help with what?’ Liam asked.

Louis considered him over his shoulder. ‘Only if you’re up for it, mate,’ he said.

‘Oh! Oh, I—well, I’m not—’ Liam started, stopping as Louis’ expression changed. ‘I mean, I’m not doing anything without a condom.’

‘ _Liam_ ,’ Zayn said, from where he was slack against the bed.

Liam shot him a look. ‘I don’t know much about gay sex, but I’m pretty sure you’re supposed to use a condom.’

‘Fine,’ Louis said. ‘Get the man a condom, for pity’s sake.’

Niall rolled onto his stomach, grabbing a bag stashed under his and Zayn’s bunks. He rooted through a pocket and rolled back a second later, a square foil in hand. ‘There you go.’

Liam took it and fiddling for a moment with it, before opening in and shifting closer again, eyeing Louis. ‘Are you sure about this?’

‘Liam. I will smack you if you don't get on with it.’ Louis said, slipping Harry out of him and shifting forward.

Liam grasped the back of Louis’ neck with one hand and pressed down, making him bend back down to lie over Harry, who curled his arms around Louis’ torso and pressed his nose into his hair, watching through drooping eyes as Liam shifted the older boy into place, and then moved in close behind, stripping off his shirt at the same time. Harry’s gaze roved over Liam’s sculpted chest, as he clasped Louis’ arse firmly in place and pushed forward. Louis made a small sound into the skin below Harry’s ear, his body being compressed down. Harry stroked his fingers through his soft hair, holding his tight through every push. Liam’s face creased in bliss and the vein in his neck stood out, but his hands remained steady and every downwards roll of his hips was as strong as the last.

Louis clutched back at Harry, his breath being pressed from his lungs in sobs, growing progressively louder and Harry couldn’t stop staring at his face, at his closed eyelids or the smooth lines of his cheeks and jaw, and how beautiful he looked as he completely lost control.

‘Buddy, quiet down or you’ll bring someone in here,’ Niall said, glancing at the door and back again, watching them like he had the best front row tickets ever.

‘Lou?’ Harry rubbed his shifting shoulder blades.

Louis closed his mouth, folding his lips into a strained line. He managed to hold any sound in for a couple of Liam’s relentless thrusts, before bowing his head and turning his face away from Harry as he burst out in a shout when Liam pushed in deep.

‘Shit,’ Zayn groaned.

‘Liam, hurry up,’ Harry said.

Liam curved forward, spreading one of his hands in the centre of the older boy’s back and changing the angle as he began fucking Louis with powerful, fast drives. Louis cried out again helplessly, his hands weak on the carpet as he was pushed right into Harry’s chest. Liam’s fingers dug dents into Louis’ skin. Harry kissed his shoulder and neck, trying to shush him—and finally Louis did go quiet, his body squeezing tighter and his breath shuddering to a halt before Harry felt him come. Liam groaned above them, his thrusts going jerky and losing rhythm as he chased his own finish and he pounded to a standstill, his mouth opening as his body shook.

‘Oh, God,’ Liam gasped, his limbs losing strength.

He pulled out slowly, breathing hard and covered in sweat as he lowered Louis down and sat back. Louis settled limply on top of Harry, and he held him smoothing his hand down the boy’s back, not caring at his weight as a quiet filled the room. No one came barging into their room, wondering what the noise was, and after a minute they began to breathe easier. Louis groaned as he slid to the side, allowing Harry to sit up first, before he pushed himself up, trying not to show his wincing. Liam stared at them; looking a little floored and Zayn reached over and rubbed his head fondly. Niall rolled to his feet, grabbing a towel hanging on a bed end and passing it to Harry to clean up, his blue eyes bright and awed.

They cleaned up as quickly as possible, bursting into weird little laughs when they met each other’s eyes. Realising how late it was once they finished, they climbed back into bed. Harry crawled into Louis’ bed and the other boy smiled at him, tired and content, as they cuddled close in the dark.

**1D**

Harry woke from a nightmare where headlights raced towards him, and found himself staring at Louis’ tanned back. He snuffled closer, trying to put the dream out of his mind, sleepily pushing his face into the warm skin, and breathing in the other boy. A small noise disturbed him, and he frowned. He turned over and squinted behind him.

The cameraman stared back, seeming frozen in his crouch next to the bed, the lens of his camera like a huge, cold eye surveying the two boys in bed.

 

* * *

Hey, thanks for reading! Tell me if you liked it, you guys are great :)

 


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